WTF 4:03am

4:03 am.

Not once, not twice, but 3 to 4 times per week for 3 weeks straight last fall.?

Wide awake.?

Acutely aware of the cat’s high-pitched snore at the foot of the bed.

Yes, the gal whose job it is to help people sleep and stress better still goes through phases of disrupted sleep.?

#reallife.??

(If any expert ever tells you they never struggle, they’re lying.)

AND…

I wasn't worried about it.?

For ONE big reason:?

Worrying makes it worse. And can lead to actual insomnia.

(A dysregulated nervous system can be one of the underlying causes of sleep struggles, and eventually lead to chronic insomnia -- when you have trouble falling and/or staying asleep. Insomnia is chronic when it happens at least 3 nights a week for 3 months or more. It's most often caused by stress, anxiety, or depression.)

The common misconception is that good sleep means falling asleep and then magically waking up 8 hours later.

Nope.

Here’s why…

Waking up is normal.

It’s so normal in fact, that every human on the planet does it multiple times a night thanks to sleep stages and cycles.

I made some tweaks to my routine, worked through my tools, and started noticing fewer wake-ups. ("noticing" is a key word there... keep reading.)

Trouble starts when you’re not able to easily fall back asleep.?

Here are a few reasons why that could be happening for you, and (importantly) how to handle it.

?? Stress & Anxiety.

When you feel stressed, your brain kicks into fight-or-flight mode, flooding your body with hormones, including adrenaline and cortisol, to prepare your stress response.?

While cortisol is a stress hormone, it’s got an important role when it comes to sleep, naturally increasing between 2 and 3 am. No big deal. Unless you’re already stressed out, in which case, adding that extra kick of cortisol could wake you up.?

Added bonus... if you’re already stressed, once you wake up, your brain is more likely to go into worry mode, making it harder to fall back asleep.?

What to do: Addressing your stress during the day can make a big difference to how it affects you at night (if you need help with that, DM me and we'll chat).?

The calmer you are, the easier it’ll be to fall back asleep.?

In these moments, my first line of defence is my breath, in through the nose for 4 counts, out through the mouth for 6. 4-5 times.

Or I got to one of my favourite ‘fall asleep faster’ techniques.?

????Menopause.

About 40-60% of menopausal women have sleep difficulties, with waking after falling asleep being the most common.?

It’s even been suggested that sleep difficulties are the core symptom of menopause that makes all other ones worse (a great reason to get help with your sleep if you’re in the menopause transition age range).

What to do: While we can never control exactly how much sleep we get or how well we sleep, improving your sleep behaviours can increase the likelihood of quality shuteye. (Bonus: when you’re sleeping better, other symptoms may calm down too).?

????Create a bedtime ritual (winding down in whatever way works for you 15-60 minutes before bedtime)

?? Practice good sleep hygiene (basically habits and practices that are conducive to getting good sleep).?

Here are a few ideas:?

• If you like a glass of wine in the evening, drink it 3 to 4 hours before bed (alcohol can disrupt your sleep cycles)
• Dim the lights in your home an hour before bed (or when it gets dark outside)
• Exercise and eat at roughly the same time each day (to help regulate circadian rhythms)

?? Optimize your sleep environment

Here are a few ideas:?

• Keep the bedroom dark and cool (I swear by my eye mask!)
• Use the bed for sleep (and sex) only
• Keep the bedroom quiet. Earplugs, a fan, or white noise machine can help reduce disruptive noise (hello, snoring cat)

(Menopause Hormone Therapy can also offer some women relief and improved sleep. Talk to your doctor to see if it’s right for you.)

?? Trying to get more sleep than you need.

Yes, my exhausted friend, it’s a thing. ?? Just because you spend 11 hours in bed doesn’t mean you can sleep 11 hours. Often, a middle of the night wake up is a subtle hint that your expectations are a little too high when it comes to the hours of sleep you need.

What to do: A little easy math goes a long way. The average adult needs between 7-9 hours of quality sleep.?

I typically recommend adding an hour to your sleep goal to get the total time you should be in bed. This gives you wiggle room for falling asleep and short wake ups.?

So, if you want 8 hours of sleep and need to get up at 6 am, you’re ideally in wind down mode by 9 pm.?

There ya be.

If you’re having trouble falling or staying asleep…?

First, I’m sorry. Sleep difficulties are stressful.?And stress makes sleep difficulties worse.

Second, I’m here. DM if you want to talk sleep, stress or both.