Writing our story with co-authors

Life does not come with an instruction manual.

[It actually does but that is for another deeper post]

We are born into this world fresh and new.

?Where we go from there is dependent on three basic periods of our lives.?

We will look at these periods through the work of Dr. Morris Massey’s well-researched perspective, “What You Are Is Where You Were When.” from his book The People Puzzle.

The basis of this research is three periods in a person’s life, which he defines as:

1. The Imprint Period. 2. The Modeling Period. 3. The Socialization Period.

The imprint period is considered from birth to about age 7.

You are a sponge and take in everything from your environment. We absorb pretty much everything around us and take it as truth. Especially when it comes from our parents and those very close to us.?

The modeling period is from around age 7 to age 14.

During this period we copy people. We look at those we respect and get respect and act as they do. This period now comes with some filters and we are no longer just blinding accepting their behaviors and making them our own but we try these things on like a suit of clothes and see how they feel and if it is right for us.?

The last period (according to Dr. Massey) is the socialization period. This is roughly between the ages of 14 and 21.

In this period we are largely influenced by our peers. As we develop more as individuals we look to get away from our earlier “programming”. We tend to look towards those that seem more like us. We are also very influenced by media such as books, music, television during this period. The things that speak to us are things that seem to align with the values of the peer group at the time as well.?

There is a fourth period that comes from Dr. William James, who is considered the father of modern psychology. That is our work persona and that comes from the ages of 21-27.

We build our foundations based on those around us and other external models for how we are to “be” in the work world.? Keeping in mind that Dr. James said that by the age of 30 ?“the character has set like plaster, and will never soften again.”?

It is a good thing that he is not correct and the fact we are capable of change is the key point to this article.?

Keeping in mind how we build our filters (which lead to our external behaviors and so called personality)? in this life as we grow, you can see that there are many points in our lives where we may have gained limiting beliefs that do not serve us.?

Just because someone in your life that you respected or were around during your imprint period had a belief or acted a certain way does not mean that same behavior will be what allows you to live your life's purpose.?

As we go through these periods in our lives we also come across emotions (and beliefs around them) and we learn what each means and how we are supposed to respond to each. This will also be addressed in another article.?

The great thing is that around the age of 30 is when a lot of people are really starting to live their lives. They have gone through the fundamental developmental stages and are starting to truly become themselves without the influence of others.?

This is why I happen to choose this age as the youngest age of clients I work with. I tend to work with people between the ages of 30-55 (I will help all clients that see the value in working with me but this is my focus).?

People can go through their lives and? not see their purpose. Or they see it but are held back by limiting beliefs from the past that tell them that they are either over ambitious or just fooling themselves for one reason or another.?

There is also a group of people who feel that life is good enough. They can't see their purpose or find passion around it even if they did. They just know that something is off. There is more to life than the life they are currently living.?

This was my story. I had a calling from a very young age and it was screaming at me my whole life to live that purpose. It was something that wasn't acknowledged when I was younger so I figured that it was foolishness and not something to be gone after.?

The calling was so loud that I found ways to kind of live that purpose but not fully and not in the way that I was being called on to do.?

It took many years for me to let go of all of the limiting thoughts and beliefs from my past about my calling and about my ability to step out and be successful on my own.?

Now I work with others who are on that same path and are not sure what to do about it.?

I help people start from where they are currently at in their lives. Building that awareness that they are not where they want to be. And that can be that they have no idea about that purpose but just feel there is more out there or it can be they are trying to get on their path but can't figure out why they are not getting there. I also work with people that are working to live their purpose but that last step just feels a bit out of reach.?

Have you ever felt that there was more to this life for you but couldn't quite figure out how to move towards that bright future?

Maybe you are living a life that is “pretty good” but not as fulfilling as you would like it to be. Maybe spending a lot of energy (time, money, mental energy) trying to keep yourself busy to avoid these thoughts.?

I would love to share more about these processes and how I can help you live your life of purpose.?

Contact me either through email or DM to set up a time to talk more about this and your current situation.?