Wrapping up the Defining Decade

Nothing makes me more excited than the opportunity to reflect on the year (the good, the bad, and the ugly), celebrate accomplishments, think about lessons learned, and plan ahead for a fresh new start.

This year is especially exciting because I'm also saying goodbye to my twenties - arguably some of the most transformative years of my life. According to Meg Jay, it's also known as the "Defining Decade" - the foundation of your life for your 30's, 40's, 50's, and beyond.

My biggest takeaway from the "Defining Decade"? To "get along, get ahead, get happy," and to be kind to your future self. In the most uncertain years of my life, this book encouraged me claim my twenties. Like flying an airplane, small course corrections can have significant impact on the trajectory of your life. You are defining your future right now in your decisions and choices - developing your personality and habits, earning identity capital, focusing on career growth, and investing in relationships.

As I close out the "Defining Decade" of my twenties, I wanted to share the 9 ways I survived (and thrived!) in the midst of uncertainty, challenges, and constant change:

1. Find your support system: My support system consists of God, my family, and my friends. I cannot stress the importance of having a strong support system, especially during times of change. When the whole world feels like it's falling apart, look for the people who you can be vulnerable with - the ones who advise you and support you no matter what. "The best kind of people are the ones that come into your life, and make you see the sun where you only saw clouds. The people that believe in you so much, you start to believe in you too. The people that love you, simply for being you. The once in a lifetime kind of people."
2. Live as an essentialist: Simplicity is the key to happiness and fulfillment. By pursuing less, you have the time and energy to make the highest contribution to the goals and people who matter most. For me, this also meant minimizing relationships and interactions with people who didn't add value to my life. As tough as this may be, time is your most precious resource - spend it wisely. To add on to #1, it's just as important to identify the people who don't love you and believe in you. Let go of the toxic relationships so that you have the time and energy for people who actually deserve it.
3. Stay fit - mentally and physically: Research shows that staying physically fit increases your confidence, willpower, and focus. It makes you determined, passionate, and dedicated to develop your mind, body, and soul. I can't thank my personal trainers (hey Debbi Paige and Peter Moya!) enough for motivating me and keeping me grounded both physically and mentally. Dance, hot yoga, pilates, trampoline, and ballet were some of my favorite activities this year. Try every single possible physical activity until you find something you LOVE and stick with it.
4. Have your "Best Year Yet": I deleted the word "resolution" from my vocabulary and created goals and plans after reading this book. I had a pretty significant personal breakthrough with this one - you can reflect on your values, the roles you take on in your life, and most importantly, your vision and how to achieve it. More on this in last year's blog.
5. Find your FLOW state(s) and optimize for it: Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi asks, "What makes a life worth living?" What are the activities that give you lasting fulfillment - so much so that time stands still - when you're completely focused, immersed, and energized? Then, think about how you can incorporate these flow states into various areas of your life.
6. Design your life: What if you can build your way forward in life, using the principles and concepts of design thinking? Instead of fearing failure, what if you can design a series of prototypes and experiments to take small steps towards your biggest goals? What happens when you examine your biggest dreams (the ones that scare you) and actually started working on them?
7. Get yourself a Bullet Journal: "Track the past, order the present, design the future." Nothing says accountability like a good bullet journal. After setting my yearly goals, I break them down into monthly ones, and track them on a weekly and daily basis. I journal, I meditate, I ideate... bullet journaling has transformed my life in more ways than I could have ever imagined. It's my way of being honest with myself at all times.
8. Tackle your "First 90 Days": Starting a new job? Promotion? Lateral move? I can't recommend this book enough for any transitions you might be going through at work. Known as the "Onboarding Bible" in the business world, it guides you through the questions and checkpoints that you should be looking for at 30 days, 60 days, and 90 days into your transition.
9. Never stop learning: Adopt a growth mindset in everything you do professionally and personally. Whether it's at work, in school, or even a hobby - have confidence in yourself and in your abilities. Things that may not work well at first can improve over time. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable, and step into every challenge and fear knowing that you can always get better. Work hard, keep learning, and keep growing.

If I learned anything in 2018 (and in my twenties), it's that the only thing constant is change. Whether the change is positive or negative, it can be really difficult if you're going through constant changes for a long period of time (thanks 2018!).

But even with the extreme uncertainty, I also experienced incredible professional and personal growth, and I feel stronger than I have ever felt before. I'm grateful for my twenties - the ups and downs, the lessons learned, the people, and the impact. In the words of Ariana Grande, thank you 2018 and my defining decade.... next!