Would it help?

Bridge of Spies

In this article, I must thank a movie: Bridge of Spies, and that's pretty weird since I will talk about a principle we face in many occasions in our lives and in much better and sophisticated ways than how is presented in Matt Charman and the Coen brothers' movie.

I am not a cinema expert so here's the trailer, watch the movie and have your own opinion regarding it. For the purpose of this article, only a few scenes interest me.

During the movie, James B. Donovan (Tom Hanks) asks many times Rudolf Abel (Mark Rylance) if he is worried, and the soviet spy always answers:

Would it help?

I remember watching this movie and loving how he was answering that question, the calm and the real peace of mind he managed knowing that many people were willing to send him to the electric chair.

Ok ok, I know it's an extreme situation and it's a movie with super good actors, the point is that, trivial or not, those few scenes triggered something in me that made me start applying that approach: stop worrying about stuff I can't control or change, to put it simply.

Well, I started to try to apply that approach. Is not that easy as it sounds.

The Stoics

When I say that we face this concept many other times in life is because somebody analysed it in deep some thousands of years ago. I am talking about the Stoics who delivered us excellent life principles around 3 centuries BC.

For sure I studied them in high school, but at the time they did not strike me as much as a Hollywood movie. I know, I'm sorry Marcus Aurelius, my bad.

Anyway, the Stoics believed that complaining and worrying about things that cannot be changed is insane. Epictetus summed it up masterfully:

There is only one path to happiness: to stop worrying about things that are beyond the power of our will

This stoic philosopher thought that worrying, complaining, and wasting emotional energy on things we cannot change or control is the quickest and most direct path to depression and nervous exhaustion. Instead, he encouraged you to focus on what you are in control of, such as your actions, habits, responses, words, thought patterns and emotions.

Actionable advice

I try to apply this principle in my daily life and at work, and even though in many situations is not easy, I find it really efficient and gratifying when I manage.

Part of my job today is related to business development, without entering into details, let's just say that it inevitably involves receiving many NOs back after having put effort on something. Often those NOs are due to external factors I couldn't control, so why worry?

Would it help?

No.

If I do worry, I would lose precious time that I can instead use to work on something else that hopefully will turn into a YES next time. It is not just about being resilient, but also about improving time management skills, focusing on more virtuous actions than complaining about something that went wrong.

So when I find myself in an unpleasant situation I always ask myself:

Is there something I can do to change the current situation?

If the answer is yes, I try to identify what are those actions; if the answer is no, I just focus on something else and try to get the best out of it.

For instance today the COVID-19 crisis forces us to stay home, impacting many businesses and the economy as a whole. The implications of the lockdown will be disastrous and many of us will need to reinvent themselves. Unless you are someone covering strategic roles making decisions regarding how to deal with this situation, probably you cannot do anything to change it.

I know it, 2020 is going to be bad and for sure not as I planned it to be, but worrying about it won't give me anything apart from stress and unproductive overthinking. The best thing I can do today is focusing on what is bringing me value, try out new and innovative ideas on how to carry my daily tasks at work.

Eventually, strive to reach my new contextualized and redefined goals.

What do you do to stop worrying about external factors you can't control?

If outside is raining, you can't make the sun come back. So either enjoy the rain or stay home.

Today stay home.