In a world where people often disagree, we need to find a way to prevent conflicts. Restorative Resistance could be a solution.

We are 8 billion people inhabiting the same planet. And each of us has beliefs, values, backgrounds, and expectations. It is easy to assume that it is impossible to accommodate so many interests and worldviews. The consequence of the absence of this alignment is conflicts.?

Conflicts are not necessarily harmful when this force changes what needs to be changed for a better world; however, it often involves confrontation, which can lead to loss of control.

Since schools are simulacra of adult life, where students learn to live with differences, develop hard skills, and understand the dynamics of life in society, disputes are inherent to this environment. What is left to the school is to decide how to manage them.

A technique that is becoming more prevalent in school environments is Restorative Resistance, which consists of tools and strategies to understand and solve conflicts under a more positive perspective through respect, inclusion, cooperation, accountability, and responsibility.

Restorative Practice prioritizes comprehending why conflict happens rather than assigning blame and promoting victimization. Using this tool, the school promotes emotional and behavioral self-regulation, making those involved accountable for the outcome and finding healthy and constructive alternatives to adjust the social relationship.?

When the responsibility for resolving a conflict is assigned, those involved are compelled to empathize with the other person. Emotional regulation and compassion are the ultimate goals of this tool.??

But before discussing how to use Restorative Resistance in schools, we must reflect on what we have done to solve a conflict. Take a moment to reflect on a past conflict event and ask yourself: why did it happen? Were there signs of stress that I ignored? What did I do to control the situation? What were the consequences? Then, according to your answers, were your actions as a teacher or principal more authoritarian or compassionate??

If, while resolving a conflict, the focus is on determining who is the rule-breaker and who is to blame, using punishment to correct the wrong, the actions are authoritarian.

On the other hand, restorative schools nurture relationships through empathy and mutual respect, see conflicts as learning situations, and, above all, recognize the implication of repairing damaged relationships, avoid scolding, judging, lecturing, or blaming and implement proportional and fair outcomes.

Restorative practices must be applied whenever there is friction: fights, resistance to rules, bullying, harassment, reactions to manifestations of injustice, romantic relationships, discrimination and intolerance of differences, etc.

And how to use it? First of all, parents, teachers, and school personnel must be aligned with the proposal since the tool's success relies on the participation of the entire school community. It's vital for the person responsible for guiding the conflict resolution process to follow all stages outlined by the tool. It includes understanding the timeline of events, carefully listening to all parties involved, and identifying any triggers.

Yet, resolving the conflict involves more than just providing a safe environment for the students. Ideally, the students should develop skills that make them capable of dealing with problems without escalating to confrontation. Therefore, schools must devise strategies to welcome their students in moments of emotional fragility. And to do it properly? You can start offering:

- Informal restorative practices: help students use "I" when describing their emotions and encourage them to express how others' actions impact them. The focus is always on the behavior, not the person.

- Circle time: in a circle, ask the students to talk. There is no hierarchy in this circle; the members hear and see everyone. Specify rules that define the time to speak and the time to listen and make it clear that this is a safe environment.?

- Social-emotional learning and conflict resolution programs: with the help of specialists, the school community can learn how to recognize and manage emotions, handle challenging situations, and manage conflict.

We must remember that feelings considered inferior must also be exercised to increase the emotional range. Through Restorative Practice techniques, the school community serves as a model of society for children, promoting the values of respect, tolerance, and accountability. The focus is on positive reinforcement rather than punishment.