World Mental Health Day - my call to action is SELF AWARENESS

As I type, I am currently visiting family in the north of England. I've not been so well this week - I have sinusitis and feeling a little under the weather from it. As I'm physically unwell, mentally I'm tired and have generally less energy and motivation. I expect this - poor physical health = poor mental health and visa versa, there simply isn't one without the other.

Today is World Mental Health Day and this week alone I've seen a wealth of activity across social media, TV, magazines, newspapers, and I attended the wonderful Make A Difference Summit this week too which was inspiring and motivational. This time of year always provides me with an opportunity to take stock, be grateful, and to reflect on the work that has been/and is still being done. Most importantly for me are two things:

1. The narrative of both 'mental health' and 'mental ill-health', and the normalisation (including building tolerance) of the human condition
2. How we enhance our own mental health, as well as support and treat those who struggle.

To me, this incorporates 8 core pillars that provide the structure and the building blocks to overall human resilience - and I'm not talking here about sending you all on a training course aimed at asking you to 'working harder, with the same resources'. Resilience actually covers a much wider range of activity - these fundamental pillars are:

• Biology
• Self Awareness
• Self-regulation
• Mental agility
• Optimism
• Self-efficacy
• Connection
• Positive institutions

Now we can be wishy-washy around each of these - but if you want good mental health - if you want to be the best version of yourself, you need to ACTIVELY participate in the process and you need to develop each and every pillar.

It's not the five ways to wellbeing - it's deeper than that. I'd even go as far as to say it is the next step in human development.

The supercomputer - the tricky brain

You see the first thing we all have to understand is that we are all walking around (at times like headless chickens) with the greatest supercomputer ever to exist in our heads. The second, and the most exciting thing is the recognition of how far we have come knowing very little about how it works - none of us have been given a manual - nor asked for a brain like ours - we've just found ourselves here. Imagine, therefore for just a second, how far we can go if we did - the possibilities are endless and so is the human potential.

Why being deliberate matters

If you wanted to learn to drive, play the piano, be a writer, a dancer, a golfer, or an elite sportsman - one thing we'd all have to do, and what they all have in common is deliberate practice. I mean you can't read Beethoven and then play like him 5 minutes later (although I'm pretty sure technology is working on this).

Strangely, we don't seem to have a problem practicing many things in life - especially when we are motivated by achievement. Of course, we can't ignore the fact that as human beings even though we have evolved so much - the earliest part of our brain (200 million years old) isn't motivated by happiness, but instead survival. Survival to this part of our brain is simple - get resources, hold on to resources.

Over time, of course, resources (and our ideas of such) have changed. Family, partnerships, love, and community all used to be what soothed this early part of our brain (which hasn't evolved much at all) - giving us security so that we didn't need to be afraid - we held the belief there was always someone/something which had our backs - we felt secure and we were motivated by long-term connection and reward. Fast forward to today and instead, our brains are drowning in dopamine as we continue to be manipulated and influenced by behavioural scientists and our own mindless activity. Instead, we crave consumerism, material possessions, job titles, power, wealth, admiration, and validation as we struggle to manage our pleasure receptor which has no internal inhibitor. Self-discipline is often top trumped for the easy quick fix. The more we feed it of course with our greed for more, the more it numbs the excitement we once had - leaving us with feelings of failure, low self-worth, emptiness and discontentment. None of which as you can imagine brings health, sustainable happiness, nor a life of thriving.

I tell you all of this for one thing only - my call to action is that I want you all to begin building your own structure of resilience. One which starts with the pillar of self-awareness.

Self-awareness

I mean how often do you sort of hit the pause button, just for a second, to ask yourself what's going on internally? What is the beat of your own drum? What do you tell yourself every day? Do you have an inner critic? Are your thoughts helpful, or do they get in the way and stop you from living the life you want? Do your thoughts make sense, are they rational or illogical? Do your thoughts make you anxious, do they tell you that you are not enough, or a failure? Your brain listens to you daily, as do those around you - what is the narrative you infect both with?

What about feelings? Talking about our emotions has always been a big taboo that causes many of us to hide from such vulnerability. This can cause us a whole hold host of problems - and can cause us to distrust how we really feel.

As human beings, it is essential that we FEEL, and not only that, but that we are able to validate, and be validated by others for own experience. No one can take your experience away from you - own them.

So, right now, do you know what you feel? Can you reflect on your experiences and identify how you have felt? How emotionally literate are you - do you have a broad lexicon to describe your feelings? Are your emotions black or white - I feel good/I feel bad, I feel successful, or I feel a complete failure? What can your feelings teach you - are they helpful or unhelpful?

Another important factor when it comes to self-awareness is the recognition and acknowledgment of our own behaviour. You see, tracking your thoughts and feelings is not enough, you also need to be mindful of your reactions. What are you doing in any given situation? What drives your behaviour and does it help you or harm you? What is your part to play?

I started this article by telling you how I felt physically. That is because it is important for me to appreciate and understand my body. When I did my Common Foundation Programme when I trained to become a nurse, I can't underestimate the impact of this learning was for me.

Believe me, when I say this - we are a walking miracle and our physiological abilities simply BLOW MY MIND!

I don't have time to talk today about our nervous system - but it is this very thing, along with our tricky brain that can cause us distress - neglecting this aspect of self-awareness would be not only silly BUT stupid.

So, even if you think you are really attuned to your thoughts, feelings, and reactions, what you also need to be mindfully aware of is that if you don't know what's going on in your body then you are missing a vital ingredient that contributes to your daily life. At a very basic level, the breath and the heart rate alone can provide substantial information when it comes to our mental and physical wellbeing.

The good news is, using self-regulation, self-efficacy, and mental agility we can begin to learn how to thrive. We can learn to change, adapt, and accept our thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. Amazingly, sometimes all we need is a small change in one of these areas to make a HUGE difference to our wellbeing. Sometimes there is no mountain to climb, but rather just some side steps to find a new route.

I want to end this article on a positive note and talk about strengths. I know in the world we live in, it can often be hard to see the wood from the trees. Comparing ourselves to others can be a daily struggle. But each of us has great strength - we are all unique and fabulous. Looking for ourselves in others will only lead to confusion and false truth. Take time to become deeply aware of what your strengths are and how to leverage those strengths to overcome the challenges we will all inevitably face. This is equally, if not more important than knowing your weaknesses and it is what will help you move from problems to solutions. As we move forward - we have an opportunity to not only use our own strengths but also take courage from each other - moving beyond the difficulties we face currently, to one of growth.

I ask you all therefore to go forward my friends with kindness, responsibility, and love.