The World is both cruel and beautiful - But today is indeed a gift

Today I have attended the funeral of a inspiring, beautiful young woman, who has tragically died aged just 22 years old. 8 weeks ago we attended the funeral of another talented, beautiful 22 year old young lady, again tragically taken too early this time by Cystic Fibrosis. Today I have sat amongst so many young people who look bewilded, for many its their first taste of death, maybe their first cremation and the obvious sadness that it brings to anyone connected, is overwhelming. I look at the faces of my own family, my wife's tears and my three children all dazed, it's hard to take in and it's impossible to know what to say to the parents, our friends, except we're all thinking of you.

As our children were born and grew up, our friendships and bonds with the families who we of course met because of the kids, also grew and you make friendships that last many years. However as the kid's grow up and start their own life journeys in to adulthood, going off to university, or on to work, you're not seeing these friends just quite as much. You were with them at the play park when your kids were together, when you bumped in to them at the zoo, at the numerous birthday parties, at soccer, hockey or rugby or whatever activity they took up or in your favourite cafes for a coffee, while the kids ran riot and you read the paper - even for a minute!

Yet amongst all the grieving and the feeling of hopelessness, you suddenly wake up and realise that there's something good to come from this and that is, the reminder of the importance of living in the moment and of your friendships, because today has indeed been a gift. Today has brought old friends back together, it's reinforced old bonds, it's made us realise how lucky we all are to have each other in each others lives and how the answer to cementing our friendships forever is simple, we just need to work harder and stop making so many excuses for being busy - not difficult is it? Let's get busy with friends and making life long memories together, rather than worrying about work and all that other crap in our lives, because our family and friends are far more important! We all need family and friends and especially times like these, therefore why does it take times like these for us to realise that?

Our young friend, she lived in the moment, she regretted nothing and was a beacon of light for so many and that was obvious from the outpourings of grief. She didn't know what she wanted to do in life (she'd already achieved so much), but why should she, she was young, adventurous and had her whole life ahead of her. She didn't bend to the pressures that this world seems to putting on our young people - the materialistic world of the constantly connected, bombarding them with social media, telling them how their lives could be/should be, what they should look like, where their friendships are formed at the click of a button, but taken away by the same simple click of the same button, without a thought! We seem hell bent of frightening the next generation with stories of AI taking over the jobs they haven't even got yet and get a university degree, or else? So much pressure! Why cant they just be kids, because they're adults for a long time?

It made me think hard and yes I have regrets, because there are things I didn't do when I had the chance. Maybe I was scared, fearful of what might be, of how people might perceive me, will my street cred get damaged? But I realise now I was scared of nothing and so it's time to take chances again and f**k regrets!

But do I regret the past, not at all - hey not even my tattoos - they're part of me now!

So if we only took the time to watch out for each other, to try and show compassion and understanding for our fellow human beings, to make sure our family and friends are ok by talking more and just being there when they need us, even just as an extra ear to listen. And for me the lesson learnt, to practice living in the moment, because surely wouldn't the world feel like a better place if we did?

For Abby and Nicole