Workplace Vulnerability in Assessment Conversations

The Hidden Depths of Organizational Interactions

In organisational life, where decisions and assessments shape careers and destinies, the question, "In undertaking our tasks, what are we truly accomplishing?" offers a profound lens through which to examine our actions. It challenges us to look beyond the mechanics of our work and delve into their deeper implications, both for ourselves and others. This inquiry becomes especially pertinent in high-stakes conversations, such as providing feedback in an assessment centre.

The scenario—an observer is tasked with informing a candidate of their unsuccessful performance—serves as a microcosm of human interactions filled with vulnerability, power dynamics, and the unspoken. On the surface, it appears to be a professional exchange, structured and procedural. Yet beneath it lies an intricate tapestry of emotions: the candidate's shame and fear, the observer's anxiety and self-doubt, and the coach’s relief in moving towards closure. This interplay of unspoken feelings invites us to ponder: Are we merely completing a task, or are we engaging in something far more profound and transformative?

The Observer's Dilemma: Beyond Professional Protocol

The observer’s anticipatory anxiety mirrors the universal discomfort of confronting another’s disappointment. While the meticulous gathering of evidence and data ostensibly prepares for questions, it might also serve as a shield against the emotional weight of the task. The observer’s fear of the participant’s response highlights an often-overlooked aspect of such conversations: the vulnerability of the one delivering difficult news. In doing what they are doing, are they seeking to inform—or to defend themselves against the participant’s potential pain? The need to stay rooted in facts might obscure the deeper need to connect to acknowledge the shared humanity in this difficult moment.

The Participant's Journey: More Than Just Performance

For the participant, the assessment is not merely a professional exercise but an encounter with their self-worth. The stakes are not limited to a performance review but extend to identity, aspirations, and the ever-present fear of judgment from peers and subordinates. When the participant is told, "You have not succeeded," the response is shaped as much by internal narratives of failure as by external realities.

The Unspoken Emotional Landscape

Yet, the conversation largely overlooks the emotional landscape. The participant’s shame, fear, and potential humiliation remain unacknowledged, lingering in the unsaid. By concentrating on actionable next steps, the coach and observer may inadvertently reinforce the notion that these feelings have no place in the professional realm. The unrecognised becomes unresolved, leaving emotional residues that influence future interactions and self-perceptions.

Surface Resolution vs. Deeper Understanding

The coach’s role—to guide the conversation towards a structured conclusion—seems effective. The participant departs with a plan, the observer feels supported, and the coach experiences closure. Yet, one must ponder: What has truly been accomplished? In their eagerness to progress, have they overlooked an opportunity for a deeper, more meaningful engagement? The lack of a discussion about shame, fear, and loss signifies a broader cultural tendency to evade vulnerability, to prioritise results over emotions, and to confuse resolution with resolution.

The Lingering Impact of Unaddressed Emotions

When shame, loss, and fear are not addressed, they do not simply disappear. Instead, they linger, unacknowledged and unresolved, shaping behaviours and relationships in subtle yet significant ways. The participant may carry this moment as a scar, influencing their confidence, trust, and willingness to take risks. The observer may internalise their own discomfort, avoiding future difficult conversations or approaching them with detachment. The coach, satisfied with procedural closure, may fail to recognise the deeper impact of their role. What are we truly doing, then, when we neglect to engage with the unspoken? Are we shielding ourselves from discomfort, perpetuating a culture of avoidance, or denying others the chance for genuine growth and connection?

Creating Space for Authentic Connection

The true work in such moments lies not in the efficient delivery of feedback but in creating a space where the full spectrum of human experience can be acknowledged. This requires courage: the courage to sit with discomfort, to name the unnameable, and to resist the impulse to move quickly towards resolution. It also requires presence—the ability to be fully attuned to the other person, not merely as a candidate or a participant, but as a fellow human being navigating their own complexities.

Transaction to Transformation

This approach transforms the conversation from a transactional exchange into a relational encounter. It enables the participant to feel seen and understood, rather than merely assessed. It challenges the observer to confront their own vulnerabilities, promoting personal growth. It invites the coach to expand their role from facilitator to co-journeyer in the shared pursuit of wisdom and understanding.

Choosing Depth Over Surface

In moments like these, we shape cultures, relationships, and self-perceptions. We are deciding whether to perpetuate surface-level engagement or dive into the deeper waters of human connection. We are choosing whether to prioritise tasks or honour the shared humanity that underpins them. When we ask, "In doing what we are doing, what are we really doing?" We are not just questioning our actions but our very being. Are we content to remain observers, or will we dare to participate in the profound, messy, and beautiful process of human growth? Answering this question begins to uncover the true meaning of our work—and, perhaps, of our lives.

This insightful piece was written by Steve Correa, one of our distinguished panelists for the upcoming webinar on the SaptaSwara Coaching Framework. Interested in exploring how yogic principles can transform your coaching practice? Join us for an enlightening session with Steve Correa and Raghu Ananthanarayanan on Thursday, 23rd January at 7:30 PM IST.

In this transformative webinar, you'll discover the 7 fundamental principles of yogic coaching that create harmony in both personal and professional spheres. Whether you're a coach looking to enhance your practice or a leader seeking a deeper understanding of self-mastery, this session promises valuable insights into integrating ancient wisdom with modern coaching approaches.

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