Workplace bullying: Silent but deadly.

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In hindsight, I’d never been that person that empathized with people who experienced bullying in workplaces. I sincerely believed that the issue was less important and should be suppressed at the lower rung of the priority ladder. I held the view that people ought to grow tough skin as a general survival skill. They should be grateful that they had jobs and should stop whining about little workplace politics. Now, I still shudder at how ignorant, insensitive and dreadful my thoughts were, and how much conviction I had.?

From where I stand today, it is easy to understand that my insensitivity was borne out of inexperience and somewhat indifference to what I did not understand has inflicted so much pain to millions of people in the world. This reminds me of the African adage, “when the corpse of another person is carried along the road, it looks and feels like a stack of wood to strangers”. Maybe if I had paid a little more attention. Maybe if I had cared a little more. Maybe if I did some research to understand how people felt, rather than rushing to invalidate people’s painful workplace experiences, I might have acted differently and probably helped.?

Workplace bullying is repeated, unreasonable actions, utterances or omissions which are directed at an employee or employees with the deliberate intention to intimidate and create a health risk. It can be subtle or obvious. While it is not so problematic to recognize the obvious kind of bullying, subtle workplace bullying can really be tricky to identify.?

Both forms of bullying are psychologically harmful and can lead to a litany of tragedies. Sadly, we are in a society where people’s mental health safety is viewed as inferior when compared with physical health. As farcical as it may sound, it is quite common for people to speak more freely about cancer than any mental health problem. The stigma associated with mental illness encases psychological violence, hence the natural recourse to silence.?

The obvious kind of bullying manifests in different forms. It includes but is not limited to verbal aggression, intrusion, coercion, threats, offensive communication and actions designed to embarrass. In the course of my research, I interviewed Charity, a young woman whose story I found extremely infuriating. My anger was channeled to the system that tolerates this level of foul and malevolent ill-treatment of staff. Charity is a young woman who felt lucky and grateful to find a job as a personal assistant in a law firm in Abuja, Nigeria. Her direct line manager was also the founder of the firm.?

“I never would have associated her with bullying. She was extra kind and always wanted to hear about my personal life. It did not bother me so much because I was mostly flattered by her profound interest in my family background”, Charity said. This is a classical move adopted by most bullies. They begin the execution of their despicable plan by studying their prospective targets. They are very much aware of their strategy and like cats, they play with their prey to subdue them before finishing them off. Charity was taunted by her boss in front of other colleagues for her poor family background, most times revealing information that was discussed confidentially. As she slowly adapted to the public mockery and embarrassment, her work life became a living hell as her boss added some more cruelty to the list. She was constantly verbally assaulted. It became common for the boss to use words like useless, irresponsible, ugly, smelly, senseless, unintelligent, to describe her. The same boss would use the toilet and ask Charity to flush it. “You remind me of whatever you see inside there” she would say, referring to the fecal matter. The worst part for Charity was the constant threat of being sacked. She was the breadwinner in her family and could not afford losing her job.

“I developed panic attacks and became a shadow of myself. My siblings begged me to resign. In their opinion, dying hungry was better than what I was going through. I knew they meant well but I could not imagine what would happen if I stopped bringing home my little salary, which was barely enough” she lamented.??

At 26, Charity was diagnosed with high blood pressure. She still lost her job and was left with low self-esteem, paranoia, guilt and a phobia for white collar jobs.?

The general feedback I got from sharing Charity’s story was that of disbelief, that it was all too extreme and not likely obtainable in the modern workplace in Nigeria. Having held similar views in the past, I am in no position to judge.?

Subtle workplace bullying resonates with the majority of persons that I interviewed. It might not be as obvious and grotesque as what Charity experienced, but I assure you of its deadly effects on victims. Victims are often left to wonder if they are protected by law and if the horrors they are experiencing are somewhat their fault.?

Subtle bullying can take the form of deceitful rationalization, pitting employees against each other, exclusion, withholding of information, minimization, and stealing of credit, among others.?

The knowledge that the negative conduct of an organization results in reputational damage is gaining more ground in recent years. Many workplace bullies are learning how to be more discreet in their actions. I have spoken to a wide range of persons who confirmed how some bosses control cliques that carry out their malicious plans. Colleagues are indirectly encouraged to hate other colleagues. It usually comes with conjured or downright benefits as long as the bully’s wishes are carried out. This depiction completely fits the testimony of one of my interviewees who worked as a communication assistant at a prominent nonprofit organization in Nigeria. “It got to a point where all of my colleagues avoided me. As at then, I did not realize that many of them were just protecting their jobs and avoiding the possibility of being bullied as well. My boss had private conversations with each of them, expressing his animosity toward me. It is worth noting that he never called my attention to whatever I did wrong. So, I don’t even know what I did. My colleagues had worked longer than I had in the organization and clearly understood the game a lot better than I did. Even with strong family support, it was the loneliest point of my life. I could walk into a room full of colleagues and everyone would suddenly be quiet until I left. Things only got worse as I was often excluded from relevant meetings. I strongly believe that the goal was to make me appear incompetent. The organization had an international headquarters where groups and individual efforts were usually publicized. My boss would take my credit or deliberately ascribe it to someone else. I was in a very terrible state. I had to deal with extreme anxiety and a feeling of uselessness. I doubt I can express all that happened as I am happy not to remember some details”, she narrated.?

She further recounted how she made efforts to report to the organization’s headquarters, but, according to her, the futility of the move became plain when the case was treated as mere office conflict. The perpetrator feigned ignorance and made variant excuses for acting poorly. Eventually, my interviewee told me she had to resign even without getting another job.?

The reality is rather frustrating as most times, the targets find that they do not have options other than leaving their jobs. There are increasing situations where the HR managers have sorority relations with perpetrators, making accountability difficult to achieve. The anti-bullying and harassment policies in many organizations are mere ornamental documents for the sole purpose of fulfilling legal requirements.?

On a brighter side, Nigeria has taken a huge stride in ratifying the International Labour Organization Convention 190 which aims to eradicate violence and harassment in workplaces. A major part of the convention deals with psychological violence, a bullying component. This is a great milestone but there’s a need to go a step further by domesticating. Judging from precedents, Nigeria is signatory to a ton of conventions, treaties and protocols that are yet to be domesticated years after their ratification. Hopefully, civil society groups will drive campaigns that would positively change the satus quo.?

Dr. Vivek Murthy, a US based surgeon, has linked workplace bullying and harassment to health conditions inclusive of cancer. How many bullied staff have silently died of heart disease, stroke, respiratory complications and cancer? How many of these deaths were linked to workplace bullying? If there are no laws, how then can there be accountability? A bully-free workplace is still achievable. We all need to recognize it for what is and take a stand against it. A pat on the back of the bully will not and can never do the trick.