#WorkingOutLoud on Kindness
I am working on the design of the second week of the Quiet Leadership journey, which considers ‘kindness’. I have written about kindness quite frequently before, but this is my first attempt to consider it in a deliberately developmental way: to consider the frame or lens through which we may be mindful our our impact, and deliberate in our action.
My initial thoughts are unstructured: perhaps ‘kindness’ is the friction we exert upon the system. If we are kind, we generate less friction? Perhaps ‘kindness’ is about intent, although that leaves us with the challenge that people who act unfairly may believe they are being kind. Or perhaps ‘kindness’ is a judgement rather than an intent: this is a question of who validates kindness, and how? It’s about whether kindness is the intent of action, or the result of it: could you be judged to be kind even if you had not intended to be?
So questions may be:
- Is kindness the friction we exert upon the system?
- Is kindness about intent or impact?
- How is kindness validated? And by whom?
- Can you be accidentally kind?
- How are you kind?
- Are you kind equally, or does kindness track closeness?
- Does kindness make connections or strengthen them?#
TorranceLearning CEO, Author of Data & Analytics for Instructional Designers, xAPI Cohort founder
4 年As always, you spark amazing insights. Just musing here on one of the questions that spoke to me: Is kindness the friction we exert upon the system? Is kindness the FRICTION we exert upon the system? I first came to this question with a thought of kindness as a LACK of friction - a space of inclusion, acceptance, ease, psychological safety and empathy ... from which we can take appropriate empathetic and person-centered actions. As such, it is easy to flow to a space of kindness because there is less friction there. Is kindness the friction we exert upon THE SYSTEM? Oooohhh... given that THE SYSTEM(s) is(are) inherently rigid, stuck, un-welcoming, exclusive spaces moving with incredible momentum toward greater isolation and inequity, then kindness could be the friction we impose on THE SYSTEM to slow it down, stop it, change it's direction. In that sense is kindness then somewhat subversive? And I think I am all for this then. And with that, my friend Julian, I probably won't sleep tonight!
Customer Support Manager
4 年kindness and respect always win ...
People, Culture & Operations: Crafting Psychological Safety for Breakthroughs
4 年A couple of years ago, I was turned down a job as I was too kind and therefore not able to face up to senior leadership.