Working Parents; How has your gender impacted your return to work experience?

'Working mothers are often expected to work like they don't have children and raise children as if they don't work.'

In her book Forget Having It All, author and journalist Amy Westervelt sums up the working mom dilemma;

According to numerous studies, women's employment trajectories differ sharply from fathers' in the three years after becoming a parent.?

Whilst we acknowledge that parents of all genders can experience inequalities on their return to work, there is a particular societal pressure associated with the role of mothers.

This article will look at some of the issues facing working mothers and how their experiences differ from their male counterparts. But why is that still the case?

What are the facts?

Currently, 90% of men are in full-time work or self-employed. However, their employment status is more likely to change to full-time employment upon becoming a parent for those out of work.?

Contrastingly, working mothers increasingly withdraw from full-time employment after the arrival of a child.

How does this affect you as a working Mother?

For working Mothers, we find that:

• Fewer than one-in-five of all new mothers, and 29% of first time mothers, follow a full-time career after maternity leave.
• Among those working full-time prior to childbirth, a majority either stop working or move to part-time work:
• Just 44% returned to, and remained in full-time work three years after birth, with this share falling to 31% over five years.

According to a study by Cornell University, women who worked 40-or-more hours per week in higher-paid roles were significantly less likely to be employed post-birth.?They found no similar relationship between inflexible work hours and employment for fathers or childless women.

So, what can we do as employers and individuals to bridge the gap and enable working mothers to reach their full potential?

How can you try to fix this as individuals and employers??

Societal pressures placed on working mothers means that we are inclined to do too much at work and at home. However, we also feel it's never enough. These inclinations often lead to burnout, exhaustion and feelings of inadequacy.

So how can you, as a working mother, address this?

Firstly, don't shy away from praise and compliments. Accept your achievements and if need be, write them down. When you try to talk yourself out of feeling confident in your role, all the proof is on paper.

Knowing your worth means allowing your work to speak for itself and letting others see it too!

Importantly, don't be afraid to ask for help! All too often, we fear that others will take our requests for help as a sign of incompetence when in reality, it's a sign of strength. Know your limits. Trying to do it all without voicing your concerns will only lead to frustration and resentment.

?A LinkedIn poll found that 74% of women experience work-related stress (compared with 61% of men). In addition, a study by Maven found that working women are 23% more likely to burn out than men.?

?This burnout often presents not as always as depression or fatigue but as a partial shutdown. As one expert on exhaustion put it, "it's this lack of brightness. The full extent of their person isn't showing. They're weary."

As someone employing working mothers, what can you do?

Providing flexible working options at all levels will increase opportunities for women and widen the pool of talent available to employers. Growing opportunities for flexible working in higher grades will also help address occupational segregation, helping to reduce pay gaps.

While there have been huge increases in women's participation in the labour market over recent years, men's contribution to childcare has not increased at the same rate.?

?What if you encourage the uptake of Shared Parental Leave? The gender pay gap widens dramatically after women have children, but this could be reduced if men and women could share childcare more equally.?

TUC General Secretary Frances O'Grady:

?"Staff and bosses both saw the benefits this flexibility can bring. But the current system is broken. A right to ask for flexible working is no right at all – especially when bosses can turn down requests with impunity. Flexible working keeps mums in work and closes the gender pay gap. It enables dads to spend more time with their kids. It helps disabled workers and carers stay in their jobs – and in employment."?

So, in summary - flexibility, empathy, and a supportive environment will go a long way to address the issues many working parents face in the workplace. Simple, right?

Victoria Cannon

Frances O'Grady photo credit to ?? Jess Hurd/reportdigital.co.uk