Working from home AND parenting

As we go into week two of lockdown in the UK, this is my first update about what I’m seeing and some practical takes on working from home with children for parents & leaders. Helped and informed by many of you in other countries who are ahead of us in this new world. What I heard in week one.

Panic-Pace: 

The world has changed so fast that a lot of us are winging it day-to-day and feeling anxious (see HBR piece on grief). Many report that their jobs are now MORE stressful because all plans are changing. Those further ahead of us in this (e.g. Hong Kong) assure me this settles, and advise us to pace ourselves. This is a good time to reflect on how last week went. 

Too much low-level Slack/email & not enough real work OR proper time with kids? Or trying to work and manage the kids at exactly the same time: the path to hell. Competing with a partner over whose work is most important because you’ve not agreed a time split? Drowning as single parent/parent whose partner is a key worker?

Figure out what you can trial next week (two hours on/off, mornings/afternoon splits/engagement on Zoom from wider friends/family). If you start disconnecting—for kids or deeper work—consider a cascade system with your team so, when you’re not online, people can text or call if anything urgent blows up.

Zoom-Doom: 

TOO MANY ZOOMS! Teams are exhausted. Everyone is asking for a return to at least some normal calls so they can mute and make lunch at the same time – plus not have to wash their hair every day and get finished faster (or so we can take them in the car and no one will know).

The right balance of social connection for support and letting people get on is evolving… but no parent wants an 8am ‘breakfast social with their team’. An American company has moved to a 15-minute CEO check-in every morning, followed by shorter calls with fewer people. Is this something you can propose or try? Is it time to talk to your team about communications etiquette?

Inner Peace: 

How are you feeling?  There’s a lot of advice out there. Some of it from homeschoolers, who assume our work is to educate our kids. Some of it from remote working experts (including astronauts!), who assume we don’t have kids. This well-meaning flood is causing guilt and overwhelm. Even before school has issued a dozen print outs per child, per day, that gorge every colour on your printer, a teen has had a massive meltdown and someone WhatsApps their kid playing Tchaikovsky on the violin. 

Give yourself a break, reset those boundaries. Decide what you won’t do. Turn off the social media. Visit the supermarket just to stand in the queue in the sunshine. Put your toddler in front of Peppa while you ring someone who makes you belly laugh. Don't cancel all the time off you’ve booked over Easter so you can switch off work for a bit.

Do please comment or drop me a line with anything that’s working for you or anything you want to know about. More details on what I am doing are in the first comment.

Sending you strength!

Christine