Work, love, and other demons

"Join our Company and be a part of our Family!" - is one of the staple cliché repeated over and over again in job advertisements. It is like companies are looking for people to share a life with and expect individuals to feel as a part of a weird, often dysfunctional, not really interrelated group of people called "workplace family". How is it even possible to believe that a random set of people should feel engaged on the level two people only can relate? And if everyone feels Love toward everyone is it a harem or open relations marriage or .... a cult maybe?

You might already feel that I am "a bit" skeptical of the idea that a good employee is only one who is loyal to one company and feels full engagement not toward the job or mission of the company, but people of the company and organization itself. It seems I am not the only one doubting this Love thing for an organization - many people have discussed with me if it is ok they do not want to be friends with colleagues or if they like more than one organization at a time. (Spoiler alert - it is totally fine. Let it go.)

By the way, have you ever noticed how the relationship between a company and an employee follows patterns of changes in family/marriage relations?

It all starts with them meeting each other...

50 years ago: prearranged marriage, they met at a wedding and have to live together till the very last breath (at least woman as she has no survival means if she becomes divorced) VS They get one profession selected by their parents and go for internship to pre-determined company and stays there till the end of their career days.

20 years ago: they met at a social gathering or through friends, got married, and probably divorced once or twice. Maybe, on a rare occasion, they even do not get married and just leave each other once they do not feel Love for each other. Even when divorced there is still some pinch of sense of belonging to each other - probably because of the cultural belief that spouse is a family member. VS They get the job through the recommendation of a friend or an ad in the newspaper (often brought to them by a friend) and become a part of the company-family. Their relations are based on the employment contract, so once or twice they terminate their love affair legally, sometimes after a bit of dispute, negotiations, and hard feelings on one or another side. They do not leave companies too often - just a few times - as no one wants to be labeled as disloyal and "something is wrong with them - otherwise why would the company not try to keep them"? Even after leaving they meet sometimes to go down memory lane as alumni of that employer.

Nowadays: they meet on "Tinder", after swiping out hundreds of options. After several short affairs, they decide to "go serious" about each other so they move together. Marriage is not on the table as they are unsure if that is their cup of tea and even if they run a paperwork, there is no reason to suffer together if something is not as joyful as imagined. They are independent in their choices and confident in being as they are without other individuals defining them as a person. VS They meet on LinkedIn after ignoring hundreds of other requests on both sides. They might sign an employment contract, but it can be a project contract, freelance, consultancy agreement, or online service app. They understand that it will last as long as both partners will be enjoying staying together and will let it go easily once there is a better place to be. It is easy for them to be independent, to challenge, to experiment, to be cool by themselves not by carrying the name of the Company.

Future: their avatars meet to agree on the scope of the relationship. It's a match, so they will meet for some time to enjoy doing something exciting and worthy enough to expose themselves to another (not perfect) partner. VS Their avatars meet to agree on the scope of the relationship. It's a match, so they will meet for some time to enjoy doing something exciting and worthy enough to expose themselves to (not perfect) Organization.

People relations change. LOVE changes. Why would we stick to the "church wedding with life-long commitment" at workplaces?

#futureofwork #engagement #organisationaldevelopment #bpsinsights