The work-life conundrum: what the virus has taught us!

We have all been chasing the magic potion to solve the work-life balance problem for decades. Several initiatives and changes have ensued: paternity leave, Working from Home (full-time or Hybrid), Childcare support, and so on, to name a few. Some have helped; others have not. As the world shifted to working from home en masse, a few people even assumed that the work-life balance problem had been solved, by default, thanks to the pandemic! The debate, however, rages. Some home-workers are pining for the office. Others want to stay working from home. Yet others wish to have a hybrid option. 

The shift to working from home has allowed us to rethink the work-life balance equation. Unfortunately, so far, the discussion has been superficial, mostly in renaming 'balance' as 'harmony' or 'integration.' Renaming does not solve the problem- it may only confuse people. 

As I researched the phenomenon of working from home due to COVID over the last many months, I have several observations on Work-Life balance that may be relevant for both employees and organizations to understand and make the right calls post the pandemic. 

Firstly, we need to change the words- "Work-life." It must be easily the worst branding in the management world- a sure shot no-win situation. I am surprised management pundits have allowed it to go this long. 'Work' is a part of 'life,' not its opposite. For years now, we have, framing it as the opposite, creating an impression that less 'work' means more 'life,' and vice-versa. During the pandemic, we have begun to appreciate work too...meaningful work adds to life and does not discount it. It creates a sense of accomplishment, growth, connection, and fulfillment, elevating one's life. I prefer to call it 'work: non-work' to include the balancing act between work role and non-work roles (family, friend, hobbies) that an individual negotiates to find meaning and joy in life. 

Also, work:non-work balance is less a description of the phenomenon and more of a personal psychological experience. Each of us experiences the pressures we encounter everyday differently. One ex-boss of mine used to say that 10% work and 90% family is too much work for some people. For others, 90% work and 10% family is too much family! Therefore, it is better to take an individual-centric view of work:non-work balance rather than a one-size-fits-all proposition. 

In studying the dynamics of work:non-work balance (I realize this is a mouthful- does anyone have a better phrasing?), researchers have suggested three dimensions through which we need to think through the issue.

a) Role identity: Each of us have a particular orientation through which we look at the world. This identity provides the governing criteria through which we evaluate our actions and behaviors. Some of us describe ourselves primarily by our work: a professor, or an executive, and so on. Some may express themselves mainly by their family role: mother, father, etc. Some may be comfortable with both identities, while others (athletes, volunteers, for instance) choose neither work nor family identity. How each person describes themselves speaks to the lens through which they manage work:non-work balance. The role identity is significant as you cross-over to different roles in your life- because you make choices in determining what compromises you will make or not make depending on the importance you give to that orientation. For instance, a person with a work-oriented identity will sacrifice a family event for the sake of work. I know an individual, extremely work-focused, who once attended a hastily called office meeting than his daughter's solo performance, much to the chagrin of his wife! For another person, that's a no-no. They will choose the daughter's solo performance over their work as their primary identity determines their choice when faced with a cross-role dilemma.

b) Control and autonomy: When the job demands are higher than a person's ability to control the timing, the place, and the resources, it inevitably leads to feeling overwhelmed. One of my research participants puts it this way, "with the downsizing that has taken place in the department, the burden of getting work done is falling on the rest of us. My manager keeps saying that we should be grateful we have a job. A couple of my colleagues have had to go on disability leave, unable to bear the stress. I don't know how long I will last!' Another individual in a different organization had this to say, "I am so glad that my manager allows me all the flexibility I need to take care of my two small kids as they are at home these days. I start work early, at 5:00 am, then stop at 8:00 am for about a couple of hours to take care of them. I get back to work for a couple of hours in the afternoon and then for a longer time after 8:00 pm when the kids go to bed. I feel so grateful to my boss and the organization for this adjustment. I think my work quality has gone up- as I feel in control of what, when, and how I get my work done!' Autonomy over one's work is an essential antidote to the issue of work: non-work balance. One of the reasons people like the work from home is the degree of flexibility it offers. People feel more productive, more effective, more satisfied- they are in control, as opposed to someone else! The feeling of flexibility and control over one's time and place of work are critical lessons from the pandemic regarding work:non-work balance.

c) Ability to manage boundaries. Some people like to compartmentalize the various roles they play. When they work, they can focus on work only and do not easily allow non-work elements to interfere. When they are with the family, they will not take that work call, even if it is from the boss. Some people are good at creating mental and physical separations. Over the years, unfortunately, we have positioned being available for work on a 24/7 basis as a desirable behavior. We all know of people (pause, does this describe you?) who will take that 'important' call during the middle of a family dinner. Technology here has not helped at all. And more recently, we have even lost the commute time- and productivity has shot up! In one of my surveys, I found that 60% of employees continued to think about work even after the workday. The same study revealed that about 25% of employees admitted to thinking about family-related issues while at work. So even though we are all working from home, work interferes more with family than family interferes with work! How we create and manage boundaries- do we separate work and non-work, do we blur the lines, are essential in managing boundaries. By the way, this is not an organization's responsibility- it is ours. Organizations can help and support- but our habits may come in the way. 

Pulling this all together, what does it mean for improving work:non-work balance of employees? I find two differentiating factors- one is organizational culture, and the other is organizational and leadership support. 

A part of why people seem to enjoy working from home is that the stigma attached to it has gone away- it is now an organizational necessity, not an employee benefit alone. Organizations need to design their work practices with the assumption that this arrangement will last beyond the pandemic. Owl Labs reported that 1 in 2 employees are likely to quit if they are not offered the option of working from home, at least 2-3 days a week. Much as leaders would like their employees to be back, the train has left the station on this one. 

Secondly, giving employees the autonomy over their work, how, when, and where it gets done will be one of the biggest levers of employee engagement and improving work:non-work balance. 

Thirdly, organizations need to help their employees manage boundaries explicitly. Some organizations have no meeting Fridays or a no emails/phone calls after 5:00 pm rule. It helps...though more needs to be done. One organization announced a slew of measures to help employee well-being: sleep apps, exercise classes at a discount, counseling sessions, fit-bits, what have you. But the workload went up. The wrong organization and leadership behavior offset the initiatives launched to drive employee behavior. 

Finally, employees should know their identity orientation. I know one young lady who keeps complaining she is overwhelmed but is so work-centric, I have begun to believe that she is wired for a work-overload anyway, no matter what the organization may do. She needs help. Conscious leaders and organizational culture will help the employee balance out her life in a far better way- we all know that having that kind of balance will increase her joy, happiness, and engagement in life and work. She seems too young to understand this herself, but the organization can educate her with the right support. That kind of culture is rare- but I would say, necessary. 

Work: non-work debates are difficult and frustrating. Superficial moves will not do. Let's use the pandemic's learnings to pivot and be more purposeful in dealing with this issue.

Do you agree?