Work Life Balance.....got it figured.
I am going to say something contrarian that might rub some folks the wrong way but I feel it needs to be said - there is no 'work life balance'. There is an industry marketing to this want and it is thriving whilst it's customers are consistently left feeling pulled, inadequate and generally in some state of chaos.
The fact of the matter is that the notion of work life balance assumes and requires that the person seeking balance has control over the system he/she is trying to balance.
Imagine you are standing at a set of two sided scales and you have a scoop and a bag full of flour. You have control of the scoop, you scoop some flour onto one side of the scale and then the other....you do this little by little until the two sides of the scale are balanced. (Nirvana moment and the skies open with beams of light and that 'ahhhhhhh' sound humms from the heavens).
Now imagine the same thing, but there are a bunch of other people and forces also with scoops. You put some flour on one side of the scale and then out of no where a scoop is added to the other side (the market changes its preferences for your product), and some other fool scoops some more flour onto this side (your kid gets the flu), and then a skiff of flour to the other side again (some jerk sends you an email that is maddening)...and you ferociously scoop some here and there and back again, a pinch a pile....trying to gain balance while all of these people and forces keep on scooping. This is reality.....and it feels like crap.
Balance, yep, you can only balance yourself and how you respond to the fervour of things that are out of your control (which is everything aside from how you choose to respond).
So, for the record, and in opposition to so very much of what people are out there saying.....do not seek to gain work life balance. Please, for the love of all things dear, seek a balanced self. Then respond appropriately, for you.
My two cents....and heap of flour.
What do you think?
Kelsey Ramsden
Sales Representative at Keller Williams Integrity
7 年Very good point Kelsey. I'm curious. Have you ever read 'The One Thing' by Gary Keller? It touches on this and various other aspects of extraordinary living, like multitasking,focusing and discipline. If you haven't read it, I strongly recommend it.
Are you a High Achiever, feeling stuck or unmotivated? I help you design & write the next chapter of your life.
8 年I agree as well! Balance on a day to day basis can become a scheduling nightmare. Taking it up a notch to look at your whole week or a couple of weeks out allows you to protect time for work, play, and quiet time. It's remaining consistent and true to my schedule that upsets the balance in my life. The choices we make either help or hinder overall balance in our lives.
I help leaders build strategic partnerships that drive business growth | Mentor, Author, Speaker, Gardener | Award Winning Networker & Event Producer
8 年I totally agree Kelsey - seeking balance can actually make people lazy . . . Being fragmented is one of the main problems in North American culture. Instead I converge all areas of my life so there's an overlap. This creates alignment and provides time, energy, and financial margin. So if an opportunity comes along I can take it without feeling pulled and squeezed and fragmented. My life is whole - less stress and more focus on what really matters to me.
Strategic Marketing Leader & Collaborator
8 年Well said Kelsey Ramsden the relentless pursuit of work-life balance can contribute to burnout and foster feelings of dissatisfaction. Better to realize that there may not be balance in a day, in a week, a month or a particular quarter. Most important thing is to take note when the scales are tipped consistently or for a longer period of time than feels comfortable for you and your family. Maybe yoga and half marathon training get ditched this month due to a big project launch. Maybe that's ok as you will make it up next month and the reward is worth the short term shift in priorities. Or maybe it's not ok and that's the time to take note and shift what you are doing, or how you are doing it. Each of us gets the same 24 hours in a day, you cannot actually "make time" for things, you only get a set amount of time per day and often it simply is not possible to fit it all in. It's up to each of us to keep checked in with ourselves to know when the scales are off kilter for too long. Consistently trying to keep those darn scales balanced will just lead to frustration, regret and burn out. Been there, done that. Not fun! Thanks for the discussion.
?? ChangeMaker | Trainer/Speaker | Brand Consultant | Recognized DEI StatCan Leader | York U & UGH Prof | YEDI & NextStars Mentor/Trainer | Business & Mental Health Leader | Aligning Values, Well-Being & ChangeMaking ??
8 年I think you have to prioritize what is important to you. Get things on your to-do list that matter to you. What to train for a 1/2 marathon schedule it. Want do yoga schedule it too. There are amazing places too out there like the Coworking space I belong to called Shecosystem that bring wellness and work together. Who knew! Emily Rose Antflick is my hero for this. Every Friday I do yoga at coworking and then go back to work again! Is that balanced maybe not - but do make it priority to do what I love as burnout really sucks.