Is Work-Life Balance Possible?

There’s one question I’m asked repeatedly by college students I meet across the country: how can one be successful and still have work-life balance?

It’s a tough question with no easy answers. Managing work and life is hard, and there’s no magic formula for getting it right. But one thing that helps is shifting the way we commonly think about the issue. The pursuit of “balance” implies that work and life are two separate spheres competing for our attention in a zero-sum game. I prefer to see them as a continuum, flowing into and influencing one another. In that same vein, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos has said he urges his employees to strive for “work-life harmony” instead of balance. I like that concept, because it recognizes the interconnectedness of all the different areas of our lives.

Shifting perspective can take some of the stress out of our days. Sometimes, as in the case of a big work deadline or a sick child, it’s necessary to focus more of our attention on one area than another. If the goal is harmony, then it’s easier to see these situations as natural – and ultimately temporary – parts of the ebb and flow of our lives, instead of crises that wreck our “balance.”

One thing I’ve learned is that to successfully manage work and life, it’s essential to identify your priorities. That will help you make conscious choices about what you’re going to do with your time – and equally important, what you’re not going to do. For example, when my children were young, my wife and I decided we wouldn’t spend time watching TV. I declined offers to play golf. Those kinds of decisions helped us focus our time and energy in ways that matched our priorities – like spending Saturdays watching our kids play sports. To be sure, we weren’t always successful at keeping the balls we were juggling in the air. There was the time we dropped our daughter off at school all dressed up for costume day – but on the wrong day. We can laugh about it now, but it’s a humbling reminder that managing work and life is never easy or perfect.

My wife and I are empty nesters now, but even at this stage of life, setting priorities remains as important as ever. We take our vacation time. I still don’t play golf, and even as statistics show the average American watches nearly 5 hours of TV daily, I instead dedicate my time to elements of life and work that I prioritize more. That includes exercising, reading books that inspire me, traveling around the country to speak about the importance of lifetime income, and being involved with organizations focused on issues I care about, such as enhancing higher education and helping Americans achieve financial well-being. All of this feeds my sense of well-being, which makes me a happier human being, which in turn makes me more productive and successful at work.

In the end, I tell my student questioners this: it is indeed possible to combine career success and a fulfilling personal life. But you can’t have it all and do it all, at least not all at the same time. Identify your priorities, make choices accordingly, and do the best you can. And it may not hurt to retire the phrase “work-life balance” for good.

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