The Word “Yes” - A Cautionary Tale
Imagine calling an “all hands on deck” to clean up an emergency, caused by a mistake on a project you should never have been doing in the first place and were never going to get paid for…
Now imagine doing it over and over again several times a month.?
This situation became my lifestyle…?
This is the outcome of being a people-pleasing “Yes man.”?
For years, I listened to myself say “yes” when I should have said “no.” Do you need a last-minute campaign? Yes. Can we squeeze in an extra project this week? Yes, of course. Can we meet today? Yes.
Worse, I rarely brought up an extra fee even when it was warranted. This all fostered “Scope Creep.”
Definition of Scope creep: The gradual, often unnoticed, expansion of a project’s original objectives or deliverables beyond what was initially agreed upon. It typically occurs when additional tasks, features, or requirements are added to a project without corresponding increases in time, resources, or budget. In the context of marketing or any project-based work, scope creep can lead to delays, increased costs, and a dilution of the project's original focus, ultimately compromising the quality and success of the final outcome. It often results from a failure to clearly define the project’s scope or from a tendency to say "yes" to additional requests without proper consideration of the impact.
What Does This Pain Look Like?
Recently, I parted ways with a client who hired us five years ago to:
By the time we parted ways, our monthly scope had ballooned to include:
All for the same monthly rate we charged at the beginning, 5 years ago.
And that’s not even the full picture. Over the years, we also:
… and the list goes on.?
All for no extra charge. OUCH! It hurts just writing that.
So why did I do that?
Frankly, I didn’t know how out of hand it really was. I was caught up in a daily rush of client service, keeping people happy and keeping my team busy. I like to please people. I like to feel a win.?
Goodwill is a helluva drug.
I was out of touch with expenses. A deep dive into the finances showed me how expensive saying “yes” was when I should have said "pay me" or "no" instead. In the case of the client above, I didn't rationalize how much money and time I was investing in her business. Thousands of dollars she doesn't even know I invested. I can NEVER recoup it. That time and money should have been directed at growing my business.?
In many cases, I was trying clear a barrier to my success. For example, bad pages created by a discount SEO team caused problems for our Google Ads campaigns, so we stepped up to fix the SEO issues.
Oftentimes, we sought to help the client with challenges they encountered outside of our services because it is nice to be needed and help people. At first, it felt exhilarating, like I was some kind of marketing superhero.?
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Other times I believed that if we could show results with a new recommendation (prove it works first), some clients would see the value and pay for it later. Spoiler alert: That rarely happened.
In many cases I had a narcissistic need to prove myself right.
Caution: Avoid Becoming a “Yes man” At All Costs
As a "Yes man," I built a world of misunderstandings. The client above, has no idea the value she received. She likely has a standard for what agencies do and fees cost that will never be met by any future agency.?
I was often gobbled up by snowballs rolling down the mountain of work… I was constantly busy. My to-do list was endless, and I was always juggling more than I could handle.
Emergencies came often and were usually avoidable had I never said yes in the first place.?
The Price of Yes is Rising
In the world of marketing, saying yes seems like the natural thing to do. After all, isn’t that what great service is all about? Isn’t that how you grow your business—by always being available, always being willing to take on more, always pushing the limits of what you can deliver?
But here’s the truth that no one tells you: Saying yes to everything can be a trap. When you try to be everything to everyone, the work becomes diluted, the impact diminished and your passion starts to wane and gets replaced with frustration. The very essence of what makes marketing powerful—creativity, strategy, deep understanding—gets lost in the noise.
Your expenses skyrocket. If you find yourself being a “Yes man” at least charge fairly for it. Working for free, or worse paying your team to do the work, makes you an investor in your client’s business. They don't want a partner but they are happy to take your investment. That’s going to make you angry at some point.?
BTW: There is never a right time to bring up this "sacrifice" you made. You just sound like a whiner.
So What Should You Do To Avoid This Trap? OWN YOUR "YES."
Take 5 minutes to think before you respond. Saying yes should create wins for everyone involved.?
No is not a dirty word. It’s a powerful tool. Learning when to say no is one of the most important skills in management. It’s about setting boundaries, protecting your energy, and focusing on what truly matters.
How is My Recovery Going??
I am taking it day by day and paying attention to the positive outcomes of owning my yes or no answers.
Pressures are lifting. I have more time, focus, and creativity. I can dive deeper into projects, think more strategically, and deliver work that I am very proud of. My impact has grown immensely.?
And my clients? They have noticed. There were some moments where “no” had a sting. But they appreciated the honesty, the clarity, and the fact that when I say yes, it means something. I am fully committed, fully engaged, and delivering my best work.
So here I am, a recovering "Yes man," learning to embrace the power of no. It’s not always easy. Old habits die hard, and the temptation to say yes is constant. But I’ve learned that saying no is not just an act of self-care—it’s an essential part of being a successful marketer.
I keep reminding myself that saying no allows me to say yes to the right things—the things that matter, the things that make a difference, the things that truly move the needle.
Transforming businesses with innovative strategies & sustainable growth
3 个月Your insights on managing scope and the cost of 'yes' are spot on. It’s a powerful reminder of the importance of setting boundaries and valuing our time and expertise.