Women in Product, a good catalyst to introspect

On Sept 19, 2017, I attended the Women in Product conference in San Jose. 1500 attendees, mostly women – I think I saw about three men, buzzing at San Jose Convention Center. I learnt about this last year from Ami Vora, who was one of the founders of this community in the bay area. The first thing that hit me about where I was - I walked in to the restroom and saw urinals. I immediately turned back thinking I must have been not focused as I was checking my phone when I walked in, and I must have entered the men’s restroom by mistake. I realized they had put a sign covering the men’s restroom sign with “Women”. I heaved a sigh of relief, and chuckled. That’s what this day was about. We had taken over. And the lines were long. It’s silly, but it gave me just the right hope for the rest of the day. And it turned out to be great – great vibe seeing women in different stages of their career, some that came up to me and asked me for advice and wanted to connect, some I looked in awe as I saw them exude confidence and leadership, motivating and inspiring others to follow.

So why did I want to attend?

I’ve now been in the industry for 18 years, 11 of which have been in a program manager role, which evolved over time to be a product manager role. I am what you’d call mid-career – some good successes and experiences to date, do not think I have reached my full potential and have unfulfilled aspirations, and have made enough mistakes that I have something to offer. I remember back when I was starting out, I didn’t know exactly what I would be doing 10-20 years later, but I remember watching some of my senior colleagues in awe, wondering if I would have that level of confidence, impact and stature. I remember feeling na?ve, small, unsure, but was motivated to grow and knew how to work hard and just wanted to learn everything I could and knew I had it in me to deliver what I committed to.

Recently, and you may call this mid-life crisis or hitting 40 or the fact that I helplessly saw my dad deteriorate and lose his life to cancer, I’ve been thinking about what my bigger purpose is and what legacy I want to leave behind. I have two kids who I love, and yes they do drive me nuts, and I wonder and judge myself constantly wondering how I can be the best mom to them. My career progression has been somewhat intentional, but I know, when I look at some other folks, that it isn’t intentional enough, and I still do not know what my pinnacle is.

One path I can see clearly is how do I keep learning, not just from my seniors and peers, but also from the younger generation and the folks just starting out. I know I have something to offer, and I know giving back will bring me joy. So, I went to the Women in Product conference because I wanted to get a sense of the vibe, how the day was like, and get some thoughts and connections around how I can help create this community in the Seattle area.

I am glad I went – hearing some of the women there, some my age, some younger, was very inspiring – I learnt I wasn’t alone in the things I’ve thought and felt – many of these strong women also feel the imposter syndrome and have had the fear of rejection, many of these strong women have questioned the risk they should or should not take and had thoughts which held them back, and all of them have failed at something or the other – I realized I don’t need to beat myself up for those failures. I just need to pick myself up and learn from each failure. I was reminded to bring something to the table in every interaction, I was reminded to drive a sense of accountability to myself – not just others, and I got my catalyst to re-think and re-invent. It was worth the day I spent, and I know back to work today will be more busier than usual catching up.