Women, Negotiation, Democracy

Dear Powerful Women,

Election day is about 1 week away in my country. I’m guessing you know this. No matter where you are in the world, the U.S. casts a big shadow.

So much is on the line in this election for my country and the world. Democracy itself really -- and so many issues that matter to women.

If the next U.S. president were to be elected by the popular vote i.e. democratically, there is no question that Joe Biden and Kamala Harris would win this election. During the last round, Hillary Clinton won the popular vote by 3,000,000 and all indicators suggest it’s going to be a much larger margin this time. But the U.S. has an antiquated electoral college system as well as a lot of authoritarian shenanigans going on that, in the end, may steal the election from the general will. Big fingers crossed that this won’t happen. The good news is that, however bumpy the ride, the world wants more democracy, and women are key to getting it.

One of my favorite quotes is from Kurt Lewin, a social and organizational psychologist who had been deeply impacted by the fascism in WWII -- Everyone understands authority, but democracy is a learned behavior.

And another favorite quote I like now is from the feminist icon, Carol Gilligan -- Feminism is the movement to free democracy from patriarchy.

What does negotiation have to do with all this and why take a course about negotiation in the midst of this crazy moment we are all living through?

Negotiation is core to democracy.

I would also venture a guess, though I haven’t seen any research on it, that women’s strength in negotiation is the secret sauce that truly makes democracy work.

My 25 year-old beautiful son told me last night (we were talking about gender, no surprise there) that even among the presumably progressive young women he dates, they wait for him to make decisions, to lead. They are trained to follow, not necessarily to negotiate.

They are young. Give them time.

Women accommodate and defer at our peril. Having needs, meeting our needs, advocating for our needs at home, at work and in the world is what this world needs right now to re-balance this planet.

There’s a saying 'don’t sweat the small stuff'. But when we negotiate the small stuff well, we negotiate the big stuff well too.

I saw some powerful data the other day from the not-for-profit Council on Foreign Relations:

• Including women at the peace table produces better outcomes but women are often excluded.
• Between 1992-2019, women constituted on average 13% of negotiators, 6% of mediators, & 6% of signatories in major peace processes worldwide
• A growing body of research is showing how including women in negotiation processes greatly contributes to more peace and stability in the world

So join me for this round of Women, Negotiation & Power, Level 1 where we will connect the dots between our internal taboos about power, and our capacity to elegantly and pleasurably dismantle systems at home at work and in the world that no longer serve us, our families & our planet.

I can guarantee that

• you will gain insight
• you will learn practical skills that you can apply immediately
• you will have fun
• you will connect with some cool women
• you will better understand, even if a seasoned negotiator, what negotiation, is and why it’s important in all aspects of your life

Doors close at midnight New York time on the 28th.