?? The Women in Leadership Dilemma: Owning Your Voice & Power

If you’ve ever been called too much for speaking up in a meeting, pushing for a raise, or simply owning your achievements—you’re not alone.

For too long, women have been given contradictory leadership advice:

?? “Be confident, but don’t be too assertive.”

?? “Speak up, but don’t make it about you.”

?? “Take up space, but don’t overshadow others.”

The result? Too many talented women hesitate to advocate for themselves—worried they’ll be seen as difficult, demanding, or not a team player.

But here’s the truth: Advocating for yourself doesn’t make you difficult. It makes you a leader.

?? Strong leaders don’t wait for permission.

?? They don’t downplay their impact.

?? They own their voice and create opportunities—for themselves and others.

So, how do we shift from hesitation to self-advocacy with confidence?

?? 5 Shifts to Start Advocating for Yourself Today

If advocating for yourself feels uncomfortable, start with these five shifts:

1?? Own your achievements.

? Stop downplaying your wins. If you did the work, take the credit. Acknowledging your impact isn’t arrogance—it’s leadership.

2?? Speak up with confidence.

? Your ideas are valuable. Don’t let self-doubt silence them. If you struggle to speak in meetings, prepare talking points in advance.

3?? Ask for what you deserve.

? Promotions, raises, visibility—leaders don’t wait for recognition. They ask for it. Advocate for yourself like you would for someone you believe in.

4?? Set boundaries without guilt.

? Protecting your time and energy isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. Saying no to the wrong things makes space for the right ones.

5?? Challenge outdated narratives.

? If being direct makes you “difficult,” so be it. Change doesn’t happen by staying silent.

?? Stepping Up Instead of Stepping Aside

I was reminded of the power of self-advocacy this past Sunday in Manila at a WOW Meet, where I had the privilege of hearing Filipina business leader and philanthropist, Loida Lewis speak about authentic leadership.

Loida isn’t just a leader—she’s a force. She served as Chair and CEO of TLC Beatrice International from 1997-2002, a $2.2 billion multinational company with operations across Europe. But what makes her story so powerful is how she stepped into leadership after the untimely passing of her husband, Reginald Lewis—Wall Street financier and the first Black billionaire dealmaker.

After her husband's passing, Loida interviewed multiple CEOs to take over the company.

She asked them one simple question: "Can you do the job?"

?? Their answers? “I’ll do my best. I’ll try.”

?? Her response? That wasn’t good enough.

?? "This was my husband's life’s work. It has to work. So it's up to me."

She didn’t step aside. She stepped up—and led the company through one of its most critical periods.

Today, she tells encourages others women lead and own their voice.

?? Her story is proof: When women advocate for themselves, we don’t just rise—we lift others with us. Her book Why Should Guys Have All the Fun is an inspiring read.

? A Night to Remember: WOW Meet in Manila

There was something truly special about being in a room filled with brilliant, purposeful women—all gathered together with a shared mission: to lead, to support, and to uplift.

?? The energy was electric. ?? The conversations were raw, real, and inspiring. ?? The commitment to self-advocacy, leadership, and impact was undeniable.

It was a reminder that when women come together, magic happens.

The Women of the World (WOW) coaching community, founded by powerhouse Isa Buencamino-Agbayani , isn’t just about conversations—it’s about action. It’s about creating space for bold, ambitious women to design the next stage of their careers with intention and clarity.

?? Want to Experience WOW for Yourself?

?? If you’re thinking about what’s next in your career and want to explore coaching, here’s how I can help:

?? 1:1 Coaching → If you want highly personalized guidance to navigate your next career move, pivot, or leadership transition with clarity and confidence, let’s talk. Our sessions are tailored to your unique goals, challenges, and aspirations. [Book a call here]

?? Women of the World (WOW) Group Coaching → If you want to be part of a dynamic, global network of wiser women, WOW offers a supportive space to explore your next chapter. Through group coaching, shared insights, and meaningful connections, you'll gain clarity, confidence, and community on your journey. Reach out to learn more about upcoming sessions.

?? DM me or comment "WOW" below, and I’ll send you more details.

?? What’s one shift you’re making to advocate for yourself this month? Reply and let me know—I’d love to hear.

?? Follow me for more leadership insights. ?? Share this with a woman who needs this reminder.

Let’s stop playing small. The world needs your leadership.

Until next time,

Melissa