Women In Business: How To Tackle Feeling Like An Imposter

Have you ever suffered from Imposter Syndrome??

Despite your many accomplishments, experience and skills, do you ever think you’re not capable of running your business successfully? That you don’t deserve to be where you are? That it’s just luck? Or that you’re a fraud? And any minute now someone’s going to tap you on the shoulder and ask you what you’re doing here??

Don’t worry, this blog is going to share what imposter syndrome is, who it affects, and if it does arise how you can successfully manage it. Enabling you to become a more confident and resilient leader, achieving what you are truly capable of.?

What is imposter syndrome?

Well, it’s all of the above, this overwhelming sense that despite your accolades you don’t feel like you’re good enough.?

Feelings of uncertainty are normal and expected in a professional life, particularly when running a business, but it’s how we deal with them that can be different.

Who does imposter syndrome affect?

Don’t worry, you’re in good company in fact 70% of adults experience these feelings at last once in their lifetime.?

Arguably one of the brightest, most accomplished person in the world, Albert Einstein, suffered from imposter syndrome. Confiding in a friend before his death he said “the exaggerated esteem in which my lifework is held makes me very ill at ease. I feel compelled to think of myself as an involuntary swindler.”

“the exaggerated esteem in which my lifework is held makes me very ill at ease. I feel compelled to think of myself as an involuntary swindler.”

In 1978, psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes coined the word Imposter Phenomenon. They shared that (25-30%) of high-performing women are particularly susceptible to Imposter Syndrome?

In order to set up and run a business it requires a huge amount of gumption, ambition and drive, so chances are you’ve experienced feeling like an imposter.??

Imposter syndrome doesn’t just impact women, it still impacts men. However, women tend to focus more on the negatives, criticisms or evidence of their shortcomings and then put their success down to luck, not their hard work determination or their own ability.?

When challenges with these feelings women tend to overcompensate with planning, working round the clock to ‘do it all’ and perfectly. For others, the opposite might be true and these feelings cause them keep their heads beneath the parapet and hold back from taking action.?

All of which could prevent them from accelerating their career and business. It’s clear that this could then have a significant impact on a business if these women weren’t able to find a solution.

Different ways imposter syndrome can present in women

Valerie Young, the author of The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women shared in her book patterns that she noticed in people who experienced feelings of being an imposter. She categorised these as:?

• “Perfectionists” - these women have extremely high expectations for themselves. If they don’t meet their goals they feel like failures. If they make a mistake, it will make them question their own competence.?
• “Experts” these women feel that they need to become experts before they can take on a new endeavour. They will seek qualifications, training or purchase books in order to become ‘experts’. This holds these women back from reaching their truest potential because they hold off taking action until they are an ‘expert’.?
• “Soloists” feel the need to accomplish tasks on their own. If they have to ask for help, it’s a sign that they are a failure or a fraud.
• “Superwomen” push themselves to work harder than anyone around them, to prove they aren’t an imposter. They feel the need to succeed in all aspects of life and don’t feel like they are successful when they are not accomplishing or working towards something.?
• A “Natural Genius” is what the name implies, someone whose skills usually come naturally, with very little effort. However, when a ‘natural genius’ finds something harder than usual, they’re likely to think that is because they aren’t good enough. Taking this as evidence they’re an imposter.

Buy it here : The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women

Why do we get feelings of being an imposter?

Unfortunately, there is no obvious answer. Some experts have stated that childhood experiences can spark a sense of being an imposter. Psychologist Audrey Ervin said in Time Magazine that “People often internalize these ideas: that in order to be loved or be lovable, I need to achieve…It becomes a self-perpetuating cycle.”

“People often internalize these ideas: that in order to be loved or be lovable, I need to achieve…It becomes a self-perpetuating cycle.”

Valerie Young, says that it could be down to their environment. If your environment makes you feel safe and provides a sense of belonging, you’re likely to feel more confident.?

“A sense of belonging fosters confidence. The more people who look or sound like you, the more confident you feel. And conversely, the fewer people who look or sound like you, it can and does for many people impact their confidence.”

It’s unclear exactly where it comes from, but we know that 70% of adults are faced with it and high-achieving women tend to particularly suffer.

Why is it important to tackle it??

If you suffer from feeling like an imposter it’s possible it could stifle your potential opportunities for growth. It might prevent you from changing direction, taking action, pursuing new opportunities, or even making the leap into entrepreneurship in the first place.?

The most critical element here being ‘taking action’. Without action it becomes increasingly hard to learn new skills, take considered risk and grow as individuals, as well as grow our business. However, if you confront these feelings you can become a confident and resilient leader.

It’s scientifically proven that confident and happy people are more productive, mean that ultimately your business would benefit from you being able to tackle these feelings.?

What can you do to tackle feelings like an imposter??

If you’re running a business being able to take action, feel more confident and be more productive would obviously be great, so how do you manage these feelings next time they arise??

1. Understand what triggers you

Start by getting curious. Can you identify what might have triggered this feeling. Was it something someone said? Was it a project? Was it a particular challenge? Was it a situation or something you did?

If you can understand the trigger this it can be incredibly powerful. The next time you have this feeling you can be aware of the fact that particularly situation, thought or action is likely to make you feel that way.?

From that place of understanding you can then choose how to react.

2. Take a look at the past

Often these feelings come from experiences we have had in our childhood. At a young age we learn and absorb information from parental figures that often we hold to b true into later life. It might be that you have experienced something or heard something that has formed a belief.?

A belief is a story or narrative we hold to be true. There original function is to help us make sense of the world. They are so ingrained in us that they pass through our minds without us even releasing them. However, beliefs can also be limiting. A limiting belief is a story or narrative we hold to be true, but it can hold us back. These limiting beliefs could be holding you back from living the life you desire and having the business you want.

Can you identify areas in your past where these feelings might have stemmed from?

3. Focus on the facts

Our brain, whilst impressive can be a tricky beast, often focusing on the negatives, accelerating and accentuating imposter feelings. It’s likely we have experienced these thoughts in the past, and therefore accept them as facts, continuously reinforcing and validating these feelings. It’s a viscious cycle. To stop the cycle, we need to question the evidence.?

Take a step back and explore what could be ‘untrue’ or ‘unfair’ about what you’re saying to yourself. Start to breakdown the validity of this feeling, and start to disprove it by focusing on the actual focus.?

You can also identify the positives and the successes you’ve had. We need to work on training our brains to see the positives and not always focusing on the negative.

4. Acknowledge, and let go?

We shouldn’t try to just squish these feelings, the power comes from acknowledging what our mind is saying but then deciding how we wish to react. You can start to do this by simply observing the thought. Then you can break it down, based on the investigation you’ve done and disprove it.

I find it’s helpful to write it down what’s coming up, alongside my evidence to disprove it, and then literally chuck it in the bin. It’s liberating, trust me.

Alternatively, if you’re on the move, in your mind acknowledge the thought, share your disproving evidence and then tell yourself?“thank you brain for sharing that with me, but not today because what you’re saying is untrue and unfair because of XYZ.”?

Working on these feelings doesn’t mean that they will never show up again. However the more you do, the easier it will become to step out of the negative thinking pattern. The more we show ourselves counter evidence that disproves these thoughts the less often we will feel like an imposter and the stronger we will become.?

5. Work with a Coach

In someways given imposter syndrome effects high-achieving women it’s a compliment. But these feelings can be crippling and incredibly frustrating especially when you are trying to take action and grow your business.

If your imposter feelings are getting to a point where they are negatively impacting your business, or you are struggling to identify the facts enlist support from a coach.?

A coach can help you identifies these negative thinking patterns and help you manage them.?

6. Celebrate your wins

Lastly, another way of providing yourself with more disproving evidence is to take time to effectively notice your successes. We’re so busy running a business and moving on to the next thing, that we so rarely celebrate our wins. Often people who struggle with imposter syndrome tend to brush off their success or put it down to luck. Acknowledge your wins and congratulate yourself.

I mentioned this on my last blog, but it deserves another shout-out. I recently listened to a podcast - ‘Flourish’ by Trish Henderson, who was interviewing the founder of Balanced Her, Alyson Slater. Alyson shared that each Friday she documents all her small wins on what she has proudly called her “woohoo list’. This helps her celebrate her wins and take stock of what she had achieved. It’s such a quick an easy way to do this, I wanted to share this tip with you again.

Conclusion?

We all suffer from moments like this and it’s important that when we are feeling vulnerable to be kind to ourselves. We need to recognise these feelings, but our strength and resilience will come from awareness and continuously breakdown of the story we are telling ourselves.

I think it’s important to close on the fact that this impacts so many of use and to remind you you’re not alone but that there are ways to start to training your mind, so you can respond differently in the future.?

Young, shared in her book that we should remind ourselves that “the only difference between someone who experiences impostor syndrome and someone who does not is how they respond to challenges.”

“the only difference between someone who experiences impostor syndrome and someone who does not is how they respond to challenges.”

About Lioness?

Lioness is on a mission to help more women build successful businesses and we do this by arming women with both the mental resilience and know-how to build thriving businesses.?

We combine both coaching and practical business advice because we believe the most successful founders are those that are able to manage their internal dialogue, transform it into a powerful force for good, and they also have access to all the resources and know-how to grow.

Book a free 30-minute call to explore if we can help you.?