Women Are the Baseline for Men - Part I

Harrison Butker strikes again! First, he told women to "stay in their lane," and now he's telling us to "step aside." Let me tidy this up for him—and for every man out there who thinks women should step aside or stay in their lane.

Women are the baseline for men. To keep the balance, men must always aim to do better than women—financially, intellectually, etc. There are two ways a man can achieve this:

1. He raises his bar and constantly elevates himself.
2. Or, if he can't step up his game, he tries to hold the woman down ("step aside").

A competent man supports women, and together, they grow—pushing and pulling each other upward. When one stops growing, the other might stop growing, too. When done well, it’s a beautiful and delicate dance.

What went wrong with men?

They say men have become weaker. I say men haven’t become weaker—women have simply caught up because men failed to raise their game. Historically, men earned more, were better educated, and had more rights, which gave them power. They had the advantage because women weren’t allowed to play the game. Then women fought for their rights, entered the workforce and educational institutions, and became financially independent. We levelled the playing field because men forgot to elevate themselves. So, if men’s strength and power came only from women not being allowed to play, were they ever truly powerful?

Now, you might argue with my position that men must do better than women to keep the balance, but here’s why I say this. We have robust data showing dysfunctional male behaviour when women outdo or earn more than men. Domestic violence drastically increases. These studies extend to mental health as well because, biologically, men want to feel needed—and women no longer need them in the same way. What do you think this does to men?

The modern system has taken away from men everything that once gave them power over women. The government granted us rights, implemented laws, and introduced social policies that protect us. We can take care of ourselves because we have jobs. Men no longer need to protect and provide, and even when they do, some simply sit back and watch as women struggle. Men have abdicated their roles, and even when given the opportunity to step up, many choose not to.

Where are the men when women actually need them?

Where are the fathers, husbands, partners, and brothers when the government allows biological males to compete against women? Where are the fathers when their teenage daughters are forced to share a changing room with biological boys? Where are the men when the government places biological men in female prisons, allowing them to assault women? Where are the husbands when their wives, NHS nurses, are forced to share changing rooms with biological men? And where are the fathers when their children are exposed to inappropriate sexual content and ideologies in educational settings?

These are the opportunities men missed to step up and show women their support and their ability to protect when governments let them down. This raises the question: were men ever truly that powerful and strong? Or were they only powerful when they could control women who had no rights, education, or income? It seems they can't stand up to the government—this appears to be a global phenomenon. In the West, they cannot protect women from harmful ideologies. Look at Iran and Afghanistan! Millions of men stand by while the government controls women.

And when it comes to fighting, who fights? Women. Who is fighting against biological men entering women’s sports? Women (like Riley Gaines). Who is fighting against biological males being placed in female prisons? Women. Who is fighting for 16-year-old girls on college campuses and NHS nurses being forced to share a changing room with biological men? Those same 16-year-old girls and nurses.

My question is, where are the men in these women’s lives? Where are the fathers, brothers, partners, or husbands? Are they too busy worrying about being cancelled or losing their jobs to stand up for the women in their lives? Some causes are worth the risk of losing a job—like protecting their daughters and wives. Protecting and providing have changed. Today, men don’t need to fight other tribes. Protection now means standing up for the women in your life when the government fails to protect them. But no—men look the other way, absorbed in contemplating their own mental health or saying, “You wanted independence; now you protect yourself,” or “Men are being destroyed.” Well, you’re destroying yourselves if you can’t provide and won’t protect when protection is needed. You destroyed yourself by not being able to elevate yourself and look at women as your baseline. You chose dysfunctional behaviour over effort. It is not that women are strong, it is that men stayed behind and now they cry about it. Just ask yourself the question, why would any woman need you? Or, what type of women would need you? If you cannot find an answer you will struggle.

Speaking for myself, I prefer a strong partner who does better than I do. Biologically speaking, that’s how it’s meant to be. And I don’t think I’m alone in this. Why do you think so many women struggle to find partners? The playing field has levelled, and we don’t want a partner at the same or a lower level than we are. What’s behind all those childless women in partnerships? Is it really that they don’t want children, or do they simply not trust that an “equal” partner can provide? What drives the 50% childlessness rate? Biologically, it’s unlikely that so many women don’t want kids. Maybe they do—but they don’t trust that their partner can protect and provide when needed.

Women don't have to step aside. Women only have to step aside when men fail to raise the bar. Men don't have mental health issues as long as they feel needed, they can provide, and protect (being in the driving seat). Unfortunately, these have been taken away from them and some of these roles they have voluntarily abdicated.

Male depression is treated as female depression but that's wrong. "Men are made to feel loved and accepted when all they want to do is feel capable and powerful." Unfortunately, women cannot give them that. They have to go and do better because women are marching forward widening the gap caused by male complacency at first and now by self-petty and feminisation.

Women are pushing their narratives on men at every angle. Behaviour at work is feminised (empathetic leadership). Men's wellbeing and mental health are feminised. They don't bloody need a therapist or support group and all that. They need to feel needed, powerful and competent. But the environment that we are forcing them into does the exact opposite. Boys will be boys. Women are there to make sure they don't go too far but not to stop and eradicate male behaviour. Competent women aren't scared of competent male behaviour. They know how to handle them. Men and women are different and the balance is in their differences. If we bring the same things to the table one of us is made redundant which is clearly happening as women deliver pretty much the same as men making them redundant. This is what we get when we want to make women out of men.

Women, keep marching ahead! But! Make sure that you don't turn men into women by asking them to behave like us. We don't want that. That's an imbalance. So stop dragging your men into therapy and telling them that they are good as they are. No! Your role is to keep pushing them to be better than you are!

Men, step up the game because whatever gave you the power in the past, it's over. Women are more educated, earn pretty much the same, and can take care of themselves AND the children you left behind. Give us a new challenge. We are at the same level as you are, if not higher, and that's not good for men or women. Consider women as your baseline and do better.

PS: I cannot stand feminised men! I cannot stand male leaders who talk about empathetic leadership. I immediately know that he lacks male competence. But that's just me. Male compassion, kindness and empathy look very different. It is tough love and giving the help you need but you must keep going. If you don't, they will leave you behind.

Watch the video of Scott Galloway that was released two days after I wrote this:-))))

Men vs Women - Balance at the workplace? Read here: