A Woman Finally Free Of Toxic Patterns

1. What were your circumstances and personal experience prior to working with Steve of Blueprint For Success?

If I were to answer this with the short story; I had developed a destructive pattern of behaviour, choosing the wrong people to have romantic partnerships with. I lost myself in the process, accepted being treated very poorly, choosing to dance gleefully past all the red flags, hoping fairness, unicorns and rainbows would solve all my woes, despite history telling me otherwise.

The longer story is far darker. I chose narcissists, repetitively. All in different guises, but all just as toxic as one another in their own terrifying way. I was drawn to those that needed fixing, and only too happy to give EVERYTHING I possibly could to gain their ‘love’ (even though it was never actual love as that is impossible with a narcissist). I chased fantasies, relentlessly; never knowing when to run in the opposite direction, always looking for a ‘signier’ sign or determined to prove ‘this can work, it will all turn good in the end’. Clearly this didn’t happen. I wanted a Disney film. Instead, because of my own choices, I found myself in Nightmare on Elm Street.

I would read all the memes on Instagram, nodding to myself, thinking I was taking them all on board. Truth is, I wasn’t strong enough. And this comes from someone who had always considered themselves quite strong. Having gone through a fair number of traumas relating to family, infidelity, my own children’s health… I thought I could take on the world. Furthest thing from the truth, I stored all that hurt. I boxed it up, popped it on the shelf and pretended

it wasn’t there. I came across strong at work, could hold my own in any number of conflicts, but when it came to ‘love’, never wanted to see the truth that was right in front of my face, or couldn’t. As you can imagine, this had detrimental effects on my mental health and wellbeing, across every facet of my life.

2. What was your experience of the process whilst working with Steve of Blueprint For Success?

Working with Steve was enlightening. I remember realising how much I didn’t know, I didn’t know. I always thought I psychoanalysed myself and was relatively self-aware. Unfortunately, I was actually still quite blind to reality. I had been treated in such a way, it had really changed me. Steve was able to hold up that mirror, and for that I will always be extremely grateful. He challenged my thinking, made me consider another version of reality that I hadn’t allowed myself to consider, or didn’t know how to!!

3. What is your experience now that you have nearly finished or will eventually finish working with Steve of Blueprint For Success?

I am far more aware. Aware of not only my actions, what my ‘default’ has been, why and working on my new default position, but also aware of others behaviour. I have become acutely aware of others actions and working out the why, or simply walking away if I don’t like it. I always had my intuition, but failed to act on it. Now I see, assess and act accordingly. I have become conscious, and also, found more peace in my life than I have ever had before.

4. Overall what do you think has been the most noticeable change and benefit from working with Steve of Blueprint For Success?

I am happier! I am more comfortable in making the decisions and taking the action necessary to adhere to and maintain my boundaries. I am peaceful. Of course, I deal with the usual day to day stresses that all of us do, but the extreme mega highs, followed by the inevitable bottomless pit of doom, has vanished. I have also realised that the joy gained in respecting yourself, is far greater than the joy I thought I got from pleasing others and putting myself at the bottom of the priority list. Selfless acts are amazing, but living selflessly and giving everything to those you wish to gain validation from, is not.

5. What would you say to someone who was considering working with Steve of Blueprint For Success?

I think it’s important to recognise, there are things we don’t know, we don’t know as I’ve said before! It is very easy to see things from your own perspective, that’s why we go to friends for advice. Some of us have friends that will just agree. The lucky ones have friends that actually offer credible advice, which we may not always like hearing because they want the best for us. Either way, there is usually a form of bias there. That’s not to say the bias is coming from a bad place, but to get a professional’s outlook is very interesting and enlightening. And I also find you share more. There comes a point with friends that you think ‘I’ve burdened them enough’, or maybe you leave bits out from fear of judgement. Also, Steve is a superb human, and he didn’t pay me to write this. He actually cares, and is exceptionally wise, providing insights I would never have been capable of realising without his guidance/coaching. If you are considering investing in yourself for a better version of you, I’d say 100% give this an opportunity. I bet you, it will be worth it.