Woke: The Art of Not Being an Asshole

I just got back from a vacation in Mazatlán, Mexico, where I had the chance to meet a lot of new people at the small resort I stayed at and during my various travels.

Now, I spend most of my time helping business owners and leadership teams get their act together, so I don’t always get to have the kind of conversations I did on this trip. You know, the ones where you’re just sitting by the pool, sipping a margarita, and suddenly you’re in a deep philosophical debate with a retired dentist from Minnesota who thinks "woke" is a threat to Western civilization.

Lately, I’ve pretty much avoided social media.

Between the endless outrage cycles, the performative nonsense, and the fact that people will fight to the death over whether a hot dog is a sandwich, I figured I had better things to do.

But this trip—these conversations—made me feel like maybe it’s time to post again. Because I realized something:

?? A lot of people who are vehemently "anti-woke" are actually just normal, decent humans who have been convinced that being kind is some kind of sinister liberal conspiracy.

A Brief History of Wokeness

Once upon a time, “woke” was used in Black communities as a way to say, “Hey, be aware of injustice.”

It was a good thing. It meant you noticed when people were getting a raw deal.

Then, over time, it expanded to include all sorts of awareness: racism, sexism, homophobia, trans rights, economic inequality, pineapple on pizza (the great divider of our time)—you name it.

Somewhere in there, certain media personalities and social media warriors decided that empathy was dangerous.

Apparently, caring about other people too much makes you weak, and if you let someone use "they/them" pronouns, the next thing you know, society will crumble, and we’ll all be forced to drink oat milk while some guy named Skyler lectures us on intersectionality.

The Great Anti-Woke Rebellion

And so, a strange thing happened…

Normal, decent people—people who would never kick a puppy, steal an old lady’s shopping cart, or tell a waitress to "smile more"—suddenly started acting like compassion was a threat to their very existence.

"I'm not woke," they’d declare proudly, as if they were defending the goddamn Alamo.

But here’s the kicker: most of these people already live by woke principles—they just don’t want to call it that.

? If a grandma needs help crossing the street, you help her. That’s woke. ? If you don’t hurl slurs at strangers, congratulations! You are, in fact, woke. ? If you believe that people should generally have the same rights regardless of who they are, buddy, I have news for you—you’re woke as shit.

Yet, somehow, being anti-woke has become an identity.

And for some, that now means purposefully being a jerk just to prove a point.

"Oh, you have pronouns in your bio? Well, I'm gonna call you Broseph Thunderfist instead."

Why? What are we even doing here?

Mazatlán and the Reality Check

I’ve lived in enough places to know that "woke" means different things depending on where you are.

? In Portland, people will shame you for using a plastic straw but absolutely throw hands if you suggest they shouldn’t get a plastic bag at checkout.

?? In Nevada, you can buy weed, a gun, and a questionable steak dinner at 3 AM, but somehow people still get mad about wokeness.

Like, sir, you are wearing a fanny pack and drinking a yard-long margarita in a casino at 10 in the morning—maybe let’s not act like you’re the gatekeeper of traditional values.

On my trip, I had the kind of conversations that make you realize just how much people are being manipulated by their preferred news sources.

I met folks who were kind, generous, and fun—until certain topics came up.

Then, suddenly, they were repeating talking points that sounded like they’d been issued directly from the "Stay Mad At Everything" division of cable news.

One guy told me, “I just don’t believe in all that woke shit,” right after he spent ten minutes talking about how much he appreciates his company’s new parental leave policy because it meant he actually got to be home when his kid was born.

Another woman railed against "woke corporations" while praising the diversity initiatives that helped her granddaughter at least get her foot in the door for a solid job interview.

And then there was the guy who swore up and down that "woke culture is ruining everything"—while simultaneously admitting that his buddy’s small business survived the pandemic thanks to a government grant program designed to help minority-owned businesses.

It was like watching people wrestle with their own decency vs. their programming in real-time—completely unaware that the very things they value are the same things they’ve been told to shit on.

The Truth: You Might Already Be Woke

The reality is, if you:

?? Treat others with kindness ?? Believe in fairness ?? Respect people’s differences

…you’re already doing the woke thing.

You don’t have to march in parades or change your pronouns to Xe/Xem/Xerxes to participate.

You just have to not be a jackass.

So, the next time you hear someone ranting about “woke culture” ruining everything, take a breath and ask yourself:

"Wait… am I just being asked to not be a dick?"

If the answer is yes, then congrats—you’re woke. And honestly, the world could use a little more of that.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go drink my oat milk and practice my fucking empathy.