Wisdoms Earned at a Tire Shop
Live your life like a movie, sit back, relax and don't forget the popcorn.
Treat yourself to a sweet drink....even if it is exhorbitantly priced. This is your script, your action, make it something you enjoy and allow others to enjoy it too.
I went to replace one tire, which turned into two. Realize there are always costs to living and necessities that will offset the plan you have. I have been struggling financially for years for different reasons: divorce, health, house repairs, being unemployed, a blown transmission and a new car and being a single dad. There is a reason why I'm here.
We have choices in this life, we can stress and concentrate on what we don't have, struggle against the current or we can ride this incredible wave with patience and excitement; I choose the latter.
Agressive Happiness: it means everything to me-a book is in the works.
My first experience at the tireshop was talking to a customer, his fourth time to get a problem fixed. We talked about all the woes of society. We talked about kindness and appreciation, we talked about Aggressive Happiness.
We shared school, medical and law trends and the burden of buying new tires and being dads. The most important thing: we talked.
The only way to reboot community is to talk to people, to be awkward, to let others be awkward. It is sometimes uncomfortable to start but conversation spawns more conversation and potential problems are solved but more importantly ice is broken among strangers.
Maybe we all could break more bread together if we could start with ice.
I think we all secretly ache for community. Loneliness and separation are at an all time high when we have more forms of communication then has ever been. We have been taught to stay safe, stay guarded, keep to ourselves, don't offend, keep quiet and to ourselves.
After we solved all the worlds' problems, he got on the phone and I meet a UPS driver. I commented on his car-a BMW in mint condition-it was from 2004. We talked about how you can still work on old cars and if you take pride in something you can keep it for years.
We talked about our aspirations-to have goals, to be grateful for what you have and realize you have the ability to reach for what you are willing to work for.
He then talked about his cancer diagnosis and how perspective is changed when you are truly fighting for your own survival. We see things differently when the cost of buying tires is a privellege we have as every day we wake up is another chance to start again.
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We all have scars, it's what we do with them that matters.
Just by conversing with strangers we attain both common and unique wisdoms. Silence and isolation does not allow for people to realize we are more alike than we would think. We are not colors, sexes, religions-we are people living on the same rock, trying to put some sense to the cards we are dealt, to the cards we create and the cards we discard.
After our conversations ceased, I glanced at my car still waiting to be serviced. Now I have a decision, do I sit and wait some more or do I make myself heard? Lessons again for business, how do you handle a problem-do you shout to be heard or do you simply not be silent; there is a difference.
I work with a group of people where words mean less than actions.
I believe that management is not engineering adequate workers to perform, it is instead allowing exceptional employees to better do their job. I have truly been blessed in this regard for having exceptional managers-they know who they are.
The reason for the long wait times at this particular establishment was an obvious lack of management. You could see there was a problem that needed to be solved. A group of workers buzzed about doing their best in a broken system but someone needs to bring about change in the system, not just allow it to continue in its state.
If you don't open your mouth and be heard, you won't be. As much as I try to treat people with kindness and compassion, there is a time when you just need to show them you're here and you're not pleased. I got out soon after, not with anger and disgust-okay maybe a little-but I feel I carried myself with dignity and treated them with respect which is all we can do.
Not everyone is gonna want to be social and that's okay too-still show up
My last bit of the 2 plus hours of waiting was a very attractive lady. I sat next to her and greeted her, she was not interested in communication. I mentioned several things about my experience and she smiled with little to say.
There are many reasons why people don't want to be social.
All of these and more are all okay and common reasons, the only difference is how we handle the situation. I didn't press our conversation, she was okay in her decision to not be social and I had no judgement. The difference between now the past; before I would think what is wrong with me? Instead, I gave her space and kept my attention to other people who did want communication.
We all have to live together-we are all different and in many ways very similar. All of these wisdoms I learned at a tire shop-a morning that I chose to learn from.
Some movies are better than others....