Wisdom Comes To Those That Stray (Why I am outing my own author's pen name)

Wisdom Comes To Those That Stray. So says the tattoo on my right forearm. I had it inked back at one visit to the gloriously huge SXSW music, film and tech festival in Austin, Texas. It was 2011. The phrase is a snippet from a poem I had once found on the internet in the late 1990s, the full script of which is as follows.

"Quaking boughs above my head, in morning wind, the sky was red. I could have stayed at home today, but wisdom comes to those that stray".

I like that poem - the author of which I have never been able to identify – because of how it describes someone who wakes up in unfamiliar, and possibly quite dangerous surroundings, but who accepts that they had to take a chance to learn something new. 

I am not a natural extrovert. I was quite shy as a child. I hated being the centre of attention and, in adult life, that inclination still survives. I’ve spoken in front of an international audience of two and half thousand people in a huge auditorium in Vienna, yet I can still feel intimidated in much smaller gatherings. I am often in awe of the people I see in business or private life, who are willing and able to throw themselves, with seeming wanton abandon, at the mercy of others all in the hope of gaining something. Their aspiration might be to acquire new business. It might be to find useful contacts or to secure start-up investment. It might be to woo a new lover.

But we’re not all like that. Probably, most of us are not. It is, after all, a perfectly natural tendency to not want to jump into the unknown. One might just be propelling oneself into a deep, dark abyss. One full of sharp spikes. And zombies. Avoiding risk is what might keep us alive. The thing is, avoiding perceived risks may also be the thing that kills you. Maybe not literally, but quite possibly figuratively. 

It is quite clear that society, technology and business are changing at an astonishing pace. By and large, people do not like change. They are resistant to it, and hence they form routines and patterns and stick to them. They find social and business conventions and continue to abide by them even when evidence suggests that they will be outdated in the future. Embracing change, taking risks, jumping into the unknown does not always yield positive results. For example, I would likely be far more financially comfortable than I am today if I had stuck with my first adult occupation as a building services engineer. Instead, I started more companies than I can remember; creating and selling various digital products and services before there were even sustainable markets for them. 

I started a ‘bespoke web-based training company’ in 1997 well in advance of ‘eLearning’ becoming a thing. I started a business building ‘digital games-based learning solutions’ in 2001, a long time before most training and education organisations would ever start to consider paying for ‘serious games’. Those initiatives were not financial successes for me. They were very stressful at times, and I built up a lot of debt. But I learned a lot by taking those risks. I experienced much; ideas, efforts, projects, events and relationships that taught me far more than I would have ever learned on a single career track in one industry sector. They have shaped me to be the digital product guy I am today, working for a fantastic company – Gaming Innovation Group Plc – and getting to live in the beautiful south of Spain. I had the excerpt of that poem inscribed upon my forearm as a permanent reminder that some of the best things I have seen, done, experienced and learned, came about because I decided to take a chance, to take a risk or to try something new.

Last year I decided to do that again. I decided to write a book.

Now, plenty of people write books. In my case it was to be a work of fiction; a ‘fast-paced action thriller set on the Costa del Sol’. That is my elevator pitch, by the way. Writing a book had always been one of those mid-level tick boxes on my personal life goals bucket list. It was hanging around in the middle there with ‘run a half-marathon’ and ‘do a parachute jump’. I have run a few half marathons now (as my knackered knees will bear testament to), but I have not yet jumped out of an aeroplane. Maybe I will one day, or maybe I won’t. I am not that driven to do it, and that is my point. Writing a book was – and I emphasise ‘was’ – a sort of ‘nice to have’ life goal. It wasn’t something that I felt highly driven to achieve. But then, one cold, wet weekend in Berlin, where I spent about two weeks a month for just over a year, I found myself writing what would ultimately become a chapter in my finished novel. I didn’t set out that day to start writing a book. Indeed, I saved it and then forgot about it. A month later, on the next trip to Germany’s awesome capital city, on another dull weekday evening, I wrote another long passage of several thousand words. There was no plan. No strategy. I was just, I now realise, feeling somewhat creatively challenged and searching for an outlet. Shortly after, however, an overarching storyline began to form in my mind, almost unconsciously. It wasn’t long before the core of what would become ‘Six Hard Days in Andalusia (An Action Thriller)' was out of my head and on paper. Well...in MS Word in actuality. I then started to write regularly. 

What I soon realised was that having written bazillions of words in my life for everything from business plans to marketing copy, and from software requirements to in-game dialogue, I knew very little about the art of writing a novel. 

I did not know about the three-act structure, story arcs, or character arcs. I did not know how to construct a coherent and compelling chapter or scene. I did not know how to control the cadence of the story flow or how to make spoken dialogue short and realistic. It also became quickly apparent that I knew even less about what it takes to go from having a raw, first draft to completing a readable final manuscript, nor what it takes to publish that final product and to sell it. ‘Self-publishing’, as I now know it to be, involves many things beyond simply writing a story. Just creating a viable novel is a huge effort. It is less ‘writing’ and much more about ‘re-writing’. It is about finding and learning how to work with an editor. It is about understanding what makes a good cover and cover blurb. It's about getting to grip with book formatting and the differences between paperback and ebook formats. It is about understanding the difference between ‘going wide’ or going exclusive (e.g. to distribute only through Amazon). I had some advantages in that I understood social media, could throw a half-decent Wordpress site together, and I had done a fair bit of Facebook advertising before. About other things, I was almost clueless. 

Self-publishing is arguably half about the creation of a product (the book) and half about digital product management. There is a term used in self-publishing circles. It is ‘authorpreneur’; a person who is half-author, half-entrepreneur. I’m not going to enter into a traditional-versus-indie publishing diatribe here. That’s a waste of mental energy, and I see too many people doing that already. The point is that self-publishing offers those that are willing and able, the opportunity to take control of every aspect of the production and marketing of their books. The rewards can be monumental, in both a financial and personal sense. The downside is that you have to be willing to have faith that you will be able to master a raft of new and exotic skills, as well as to be prepared to commit a considerable amount of time and effort. In short, to take a risk and to leap into the unknown.

So why did I write this article that you are now reading? (Thank you by the way). Well, as I said previously, it is my natural inclination to hide from the limelight and to avoid taking risks. When I started writing the book I came up with a pen name. I did so for two reasons. Firstly I wanted something other than ‘Kevin’ on the cover of my tome. No offence to all the other ‘Kevs’ out there, but our first name is not the most glamorous of monikers. Especially in France, it turns out. Secondly, and much more to the point, I subconsciously sought to retain the ability to hide behind a fake persona in case it all went wrong. What if people hated my labour of love, sweat and tears? How would I handle the public criticism, the professional disgrace, and the personal shame? That was why I had a pen name to hide behind; to mitigate the risk of failure. The avatar image on my author website, Facebook page, Instagram, Pinterest and Twitter accounts was an illustration of the Union Jack mixed with the Spanish flag. It was not my face.

And then, not that long ago to tell you the truth, I looked down at that tattoo, and I thought, “F*ck it. Take a risk”.

So here it goes....

Damian Vargas is my pen name. So far I have written just one book ('Six Hard Days in Andalusia'), but I have started a second (a near-future thriller based on the premise of domestic androids who feel everything that humans can feel). I have also plotted out two more novels, and I have come up with over a dozen other ideas for more. 

I love my day job, and I have no intention of leaving it any time soon but maybe, just maybe I might earn the right to become a full-time novelist in a few years’ time. I think I might like that.

My first novel launches on Amazon stores in Kindle format tomorrow (Tuesday, the 1st of May).

You will find the blurb provided below. If the idea of a fast-paced action thriller set on the Costa del Sol sounds at all appealing, then maybe give it a try. I can’t promise that you will love it, but I can absolutely guarantee that it is the very best book that I could make.

It is available on Amazon.com | UK | Spain | and all other Amazon stores, in paperback and on Kindle.

I do not expect to make any profit from this endeavour. I was cautioned many months ago that such an outcome – a financial success from a first novel – is highly unlikely. In fact, I fully expect that the endeavour will cost me a few thousand euros. I am very confident, however, that I will continue to learn from the experience and that it will lead to opportunities that, even now, I cannot yet predict.

Because wisdom comes to those that stray.

Thank you for reading this.

P.S. Damian sends his regards.

Six Hard Days in Andalusia (an action thriller).

"If you love the south of Spain and enjoy reading about a bunch of devious, desperate and violent people who are trying to destroy each other's plans and to kill each other, then you will love this book! It is the perfect novel to take on a beach holiday in 2018!" - Kevin's mum.

Available on Amazon.com | UK | Spain | and all other Amazon stores. In paperback and on Kindle.

"We have a problem in Málaga. Terminate your current assignment with all haste."

When an old-time English drug smuggler and his crew meet their end in a bloody shoot-out on the Costa del Sol, it's of little concern to most. After all, gangsters get killed. It's what happens in their line of work. Allegiances change. Men die. It's the way of things. 

However, when Mary Lawson a.k.a. 'The Accountant', a former MI6 agent turned independent contractor to the mob, is instructed by her shady bosses to investigate, things quickly get a lot more complicated.

Hardened by her years in British military intelligence and ruthlessly professional, the woman who is no stranger to death and suffering, sets out to find who is responsible. However, on the 'Costa del Crime' with its regular influx of millions of tourists, a history of political corruption, and a diverse and thriving criminal underworld, nothing is ever simple.

The father that deserted his family. The prodigal daughter, fallen from grace. A hoard of devious, manipulating and violent characters. And an unfortunate British tourist who gets caught up in the middle of the whole bloody mess.

Learn more at www.damianvargasfiction.com.