Winning Isn’t About the Loudest Voice—It’s About the Smartest Conversations

In negotiation, communication is far more than words exchanged. It’s the foundation for building trust, uncovering shared interests, and creating solutions that go beyond the immediate deal. Whether you’re negotiating with colleagues, clients, or partners, the way you communicate can make or break the outcome.

Having operated for some years in international settings, I’ve learned that effective communication transcends language, cultural, and even personal barriers. English isn’t my first language, and my Italian accent is unmistakable. At first, I thought this might be a limitation. But over time, I discovered it could be an asset.

Here’s how I use it: At the beginning of a conversation, I ask, “Despite my name, where do you think I’m from?” This simple question often leads to an easy guess—“Italy!”—and I reply with a light-hearted joke like, “Well, I’ve been working hard on my British accent; glad it’s convincing!” The tone relaxes. The walls of formality crumble. Humor becomes a bridge, and trust begins to form.

Building Trust: Why it Matters

Trust isn’t just a nice-to-have in negotiations—it’s essential. Without it, conversations become transactional, and collaboration stalls. Effective communication helps you build this trust early.

Acknowledging an obvious reality, like my accent, signals authenticity. When you’re transparent about small things, it creates confidence that you’ll be transparent about bigger ones. Authenticity makes people more likely to engage openly, share information, and collaborate on solutions.

I’ve also learned that cultural awareness plays a critical role in fostering trust. For example, during a meeting with a delegation in Oman, the communication was seamless because of their culture of openness and hospitality. Omanis, by tradition, are warm and welcoming, and their communication style reflects that. However, preparation matters. Before entering any international negotiation, it’s essential to study the habits, norms, and communication styles of the culture you’re engaging with. Doing your homework shows respect and positions you to connect more effectively.

Clarifying Interests to Unlock Value

Negotiations often stall because people get stuck on their positions—what they want—rather than exploring the "why" behind their demands. Effective communication is the key to moving past this.

In one particularly challenging negotiation, we decided to take an unconventional approach. Right at the start, we openly laid down the limits we couldn’t cross. These were non-negotiable parameters—clearly communicated to the other party. While this might seem like an unusual move, it saved us significant time.

By setting boundaries early, we bypassed the lengthy discovery phase typically needed to uncover deal-breaking constraints. Instead, we could focus on identifying areas where negotiation was possible. This allowed us to dedicate the bulk of our efforts to finding creative ways to expand the value we could create for both sides.

The result? A highly productive discussion that quickly moved past obstacles and into value-driven brainstorming. When both parties know the rules of the game from the outset, they can focus on playing it more effectively.

Expanding the Impact of Communication: Workplaces and Personal Life

The principles of effective communication extend far beyond negotiation tables or boardrooms. Whether it’s a conversation between colleagues, a discussion with another department, or even a family matter, the same rules apply: communicate openly, clarify interests, and build trust.

In aviation, as in any other industry, communication often determines success. Imagine an inter-departmental project involving operations and finance. If one team doesn’t communicate their constraints or priorities clearly, misunderstandings arise, delaying progress. On the other hand, transparent discussions about challenges and expectations create opportunities for collaboration, leading to smoother execution and better outcomes.

The same holds true for personal relationships. Think of a family discussion about holiday plans. Misaligned expectations can quickly lead to disagreements, but taking the time to openly clarify everyone’s interests—whether it’s visiting relatives or simply relaxing—can uncover options that make everyone happy.

The bottom line? Long-term, trustworthy communication always creates value. Whether at work or home, if you have the opportunity to clarify and connect, always choose to do so. The payoff—better relationships, improved understanding, and mutual success—is worth it.

What’s the Real Outcome of Effective Negotiation?

It’s not just about the agreement itself. It’s about the trust you build, the creative solutions you uncover, and the relationships you foster. Effective communication is what transforms a successful deal—or any conversation—into a lasting partnership.

So, here’s my question for you: What’s harder to negotiate—an international business deal or where to go on vacation with your family? Let me know which one gets your vote (bonus points if you’ve managed both successfully)!

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