Wine descriptors – are they evaluative or simply flamboyant?

Describing wine is both art and science. Like any other liquid wine has chemical and nutritional components but the external label has an identity of its own and initially impresses the potential imbiber through its brand. The content inside the bottle can only express its characteristics once the eyes behold it, the nose sniffs it and when it finally swirls inside the mouth around the tongue, while simultaneously thrashing itself on the palate. But silence does not attach any gold medals or points on the wine until its personality and character is revealed through human language called wine lexis or WORDS. But what words truly define the look, smell and taste of wine? #winelanguage

The chemical component of wine can be scientifically analysed and described in the laboratory using scientific terms. But when it comes to non-scientific descriptors, we enter the world of subjective evaluation. After all, beauty and taste is in the eyes and the tongue of the beholder and taster. The choice of words used to describe the redolence and taste of wine depends on whether one is a consumer, novice, a sommelier, a connoisseur or a paid influencer. If you ask each of these tasters, “What do you think of this wine?”, you are likely to hear a wide range of evaluative words. They could be anything from – nice, sweet, aromatic to wine personifications such as - ostentatious or even feminine.

Language is only meaningful in context. So, in the world of wine, do wine descriptors truly express meaning and the actual characteristics of wine or is it a “wineathon” competition to see who can come up with the most bombastic, influential, innovative or disruptive set of wine adjectives, adverbs or phrases? Incidentally, wine is a multi-billion-dollar business and demands the creation of brand words and slogans that sell. Are such words authentic?

Okay, we agree that we need words to describe wine. But when do wine words become flamboyant or even absurd? Can a wine be fragile, ostentatious, sexy, crooked, pretentious or gay? Are such words positive or negative or even politically correct?

The era of Artificial Intelligence is here and it would be no surprise to have a Robotic Wine Sommelier in the near future serving you your wine order. Would the robotic wine words be R2 D2? What if I coined a new wine word – It’s Trumpian? Would that be 99 points?