Wicked

Happy New Year! As I stir the cauldron of my Solo Stove , burning in effigy papers and representations of all I choose to leave in the rearview mirror of 2022…I cackle with glee. I am making room for more this year. I am making space to let go of the past and be open to receive more love, more creativity, more community… but not more mislabels.

This year I resolve to be WICKED.? I already have the label...so lets go with it!

I was never popular.?I wasn’t green like Elfaba in the musical Wicked, but a skinny geek who was awkward and outspoken. This week I turn 52 and the song “Defying Gravity” seems aptly appropriate, not because I refuse to look like my 50+ year old self, but for being willing to leap up and make a new path. The willingness to Defy Gravity, to defy convention, to defy the "natural order". This is the year to be WICKED, I can feel it!

WICKEDLY AUTHENTIC

I don’t need the seemingly perfect Glinda (GUH-linda) the good witch to teach me to be popular.?It won’t work. I will always be too outspoken for most people’s comfort. I won't be bound by the traditional “rules” that most corporate types live by.? Even as a teenager I had a low tolerance for bullies or blind stupidity. Now my give-a-flip meter is even lower because I don’t have customers I might offend or a corporate ladder to climb. Let’s see if that gives Unplugged a little more spice this year.?Muahahahahaha (hands rolling over one another wickedly here).

INSATIABLE

I strive to be insatiable in my curiosity, in my quest for justice for those who are underrepresented or unable to represent or protect themselves. Let’s be insatiable for innovation. Let us not be quenched personally until our entire community is fed, clothed, educated, and cared for with medical and mental health services.? I want to be a wife who is insatiable for her husband. I want to be a mother who is insatiable to hear the stories and the truths from my kids' day. I strive to be a friend and mentor who is insatiable to listen and support.

CATHARTIC

I hope for myself and many of us that we take time to burn away the pain of the past and relieve ourselves off carrying that weight as we move forward. The people who have forsaken us, the loves that have fallen short, our own mistakes and shortcomings, let’s remember that we would not be here without them. In the words of Wicked, "I do believe I have been changed for the better. Because I knew you, I have been changed for good." Let us take the lessons learned and move up to the Higher Hill...where we have more perspective to make real change for good.

KICKASS

There is always room for more KICKASS in the world.?Sometimes kickass makes reference to what should happen to stupid or small minded people who abuse their power. So noted. Kick away. I personally want to help make room for more kickass women and people of color (even the green ones), those entrepreneurs, musicians, and creators who should be heard and seen. Last year I was celebrated by some kickass entrepreneurs such as Kay Koplovitz and Bloomberg's Emily Chang . After a successful career where I was still marginalized and mislabled after more than 2 decades of accomplishment, I received their praise with relief. In fact my two Kickass youngest children sat next to me and celebrated and were inspired. This year I want to be a part of encouraging, celebrating and empowering other Kickass entrepreneurs and musicians. That is what HigherHill Studios is all about.

ENGAGED?

I commit to being fully engaged with my children, my husband, my friends and family this year. I want to engage with the world around me. I realize that in an A.I. world, the news served up to me on my phone is precisely what I invest my time into. I am a part of the problem of a culture that is divided. This year I will seek first-hand-truths instead of hiding behind any news channel that brings me what I apparently want to hear.?

DARING to be me

It takes courage to dare to be yourself at any age. I know after 5 decades of life, the challenges to dare to be me as a young executive, as a working mother, as a single mother, as a Latina in business, as a CEO who is also a wife. I feel uncomfortable standing up as a person of faith when the word Christianity has become hijacked to mean judgmental, bigoted, and minimizing to women. My faith does not make me better than anyone else. It gives me support to dare to be a better me.

So step one to achieving my New Year's Resolution to be more WICKED as defined above. Daring to be me and being WICKEDLY authentic may not make everyone comfortable. That is ok. My name is Vanessa and I have a problem.?I have spent a ridiculous amount of energy trying to be “popular.” (Song from Wicked, give it a listen). When I waste my time trying to be something I am not, or trying to convince someone of something they will never see or acknowledge, the only person who is wasting time and energy is me. I have wasted too much of my life being defensive. When I am in a defensive posture, there is no ability to receive, to open up, to lean forward into the new. Breathe in and breath out as I relax fully as myself, because I have been effective, powerful, and successful. Being defensive only steals that away. No one can steal this from me if I don't give it up.

I make this New Year's resolution:

I resolve to listen first and better, learn more, love without prejudice, and share what I have experienced that may be relevant to others.??

Happy New Year my friends!?What are your New Year's Resolutions? How will you be WICKED? Please share in comments below! This is the first in a series to show that all we need to know we can learn from music and specifically broadway musicals. Enjoy!

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