'Wiched

Sandwich Generation sand·wich gen·er·a·tion

/?san?(d)wiCH ?jen??rāSH?n/: a generation of people, typically in their thirties or forties, responsible for bringing up their own children and for the care of their aging parents.

Monday, March 14th, 03:45 ET.?

My 5 year-old daughter comes down and gets into bed with us. She is especially snuggly with me because she knows she won’t see me for a few days. It is a travel week and I will be at the HIMSS conference all week. I can’t back to sleep, but that’s ok- I am soaking up the love.?

From 6:30-8:30 we are making breakfast, coordinating (and negotiating) outfits and schedules. My daughter is off to school, I am in my office doing emails and plans for the week, and the timer is set until I head to the airport midday… need to finish packing, do my COVID test, and then make sure I have a time slot to call my parents and check on them- this is week 2 of home care helping my dad with my mom, who has dementia. This is a huge transition, but one we believe will be great for our family in this new phase.

By the time I arrive at the airport, my checklist looks good-

• Ordered a tent for my daughter’s birthday (the weekend I return from work trip)
• Ordered all goodie bags and food for party
• Got a sub for my volunteer day at my son’s school that I will miss this week
• Called my dad
• Paid medical bills and prepped for health insurance change coming up
• Coordinated accountant tax appointment- still pending, eek!
• Work checklist (won’t tally that up)

Wheels up and away I go to 8-9 hours a day on the show floor in meetings, interviews, demonstrations.

Thursday, March 17th, 19:30 ET

• 13,000 steps per day since arriving in Florida for HIMSS
• 17 Uber rides
• Over 100 handshakes or elbow bumps
• 17 hour work days including breakfast meetings and dinners

By this time, I can take a shower, pack, and organize for the weekend coming up that will be all about my family. Ordering a cake, coordinating play dates, helping my in-laws (who live with us part time) with their schedule so they can maximize time with the kids, and ensuring a plan for my parents to visit without it being overwhelming or anxiety-ridden for my mom. I write my notes/cards for the day and watch a few reruns of the Golden Girls. By the time all of this happens it is nearly eleven and the alarm to head to the airport will sound in 8 hours- a perfect amount of time to get some much needed sleep.

Friday, March 18th, 11:00 ET

By this point in the week I am relaxed with my tasks, but now that I feel the let down from the work responsibilities, my stress increases with my parents. I have been away for a week. I have learned from practice the past few years that days with my parents are hard to mix with other things. I am still learning to live in the new world of a mom who no longer knows exactly who I am, but yet, still needs me.?This is especially hard because of the kind of mom she was when I was growing up. She was patient, she was funny, she was loved by the entire community, and the void of her old self is gaping. I am learning to balance the joy of kids, the appetite for success in work, and the compassion in my role as a caregiver.?

Another week in the journey and ever-learning.?