Why You’re Undermining Yourself (And How to Fix It)

Ever noticed how easy it is to see someone else's potential, but when it comes to yourself, everything feels normal? You assume your skills are average—because, well, you’ve always had them.

That’s exactly what happened with my best mate.

?? The Hidden Talent You Don’t See

They studied nursing, then switched to a postgraduate diploma in occupational health and safety. But one day, they admitted something surprising:

"I’ve always had this thought of becoming a journalist… in my regional language."

At first, it seemed like a passing thought. But when I heard it, I instantly knew they’d be incredible at it.

Why? Because they have an insane ability to read people instantly—like a detective sizing up a suspect in seconds. And they don’t just read people; they make others open up effortlessly, like a seasoned interviewer.

And yet, they had never thought of this as a real skill.

That’s the trap. Most of us are sitting on skills that would make us exceptional in certain careers, but we never consider them valuable because they feel so normal.

?? Why People Undermine Themselves

1?? The “Water to a Fish” Effect – A fish doesn’t know it’s in water. If you’ve always been good at something, it feels ordinary to you. My mate’s ability to read people wasn’t something they “learned”—it was just who they were.

2?? Lack of Feedback Loop – No one had ever told them, “Hey, this is a rare and powerful skill.” Until I did.

3?? Fear of Sounding Arrogant – A lot of people downplay their talents to avoid looking overconfident. But recognizing your strengths isn’t arrogance—it’s awareness.

4?? Autopilot Mode – Most people are just going through the motions, not actively reflecting on what makes them unique.

?? How I Got Lucky and Found Mine Early

I was no different. I grew up thinking I was only good at studying—reading, writing, and listening. I never experimented with anything outside of academics until after high school.

Then I made a small decision that changed everything: I started a blog.

It wasn’t a grand master plan. It was just the easiest way to take action with the least resistance—because I knew video and audio weren’t my thing. Writing felt natural, and I figured if nothing else, I could use it to educate people.

That blog led to my first volunteering opportunity as an environmental journalist. That turned into an internship. Then another startup. Then people started telling me:

"Writing the way you write? That’s not something most people can do."

I had been undermining my own skillset for years—assuming writing was just something anyone could do. But once I realized its value, I started doubling down. Eventually, it led me to a full-time job as a content writer.

And that’s when it hit me:

People don’t just undermine themselves. They actively block themselves from seeing their own strengths.

?? How to Discover & Leverage Your Hidden Strengths

Whether you’re a project manager, job seeker, entrepreneur, or just someone who wants to be better, recognizing your hidden skills can give you an unfair advantage.

?? Step 1: Identify Your “Effortless Genius”

Ask yourself:

? What do people often ask for my help with?

? What do I do so naturally that I don’t even think about it?

? What skill do I have that I assume everyone else has too?

Example: If you’re the person who always calms tense meetings at work, you might have leadership or negotiation skills you’ve never acknowledged.

?? Step 2: Get External Validation

Ask 5 close friends or colleagues: “What’s something I’m really good at that I don’t notice about myself?”

Pay attention to what people praise you for, even if it seems small.

Example: My mate never saw their ability to read people as special—until I pointed it out. Sometimes, others see what we miss.

?? Step 3: Experiment & Take Small Steps

If you think you’re good at writing, start a blog or write LinkedIn posts.

If you’re good at explaining things, try making short educational content.

If you have a knack for strategy, offer free consulting sessions to people you know.

Example: My blog was my “small step.” No risk, no pressure—just me putting something out there. That one decision changed my entire career path.

?? Step 4: Monetize or Leverage It Professionally

Once you identify your hidden strength, ask:

? Where is this skill valuable? (Jobs, businesses, social settings)

? How can I double down on it?

Example: If you’re naturally good at breaking complex ideas into simple explanations, that’s a rare skill in teaching, content creation, and consulting.

?? The Takeaway

Most people live their entire lives undervaluing what makes them special. They assume their skills are nothing unique—until someone else points it out.

So take a step back. Reflect. Ask. Recognize your strengths.

Because the real tragedy isn’t not having talent—it’s not realizing you had it all along.