This is Why Your Anxiety Isn't Getting Better

Let me start by saying this loud and clear: it’s not normal to live in constant fear or panic. Yes, anxiety is a part of life, but it’s not meant to dim your light or keep you from living fully. Society has almost glorified anxiety disorders, making it seem like they’re just the price we pay for success. But that’s not true.

I’ve lived with anxiety for years, and one of the biggest realizations I’ve had is that anxiety isn’t something to eliminate. Instead, it’s about tapping into the power entwined with it. Yes, you heard that right — there’s power in your anxiety. It’s not about disempowerment; it’s about learning to work with it, not against it.

We often treat anxiety like an illness to be cured, but it only escalates when we don’t understand why it’s showing up in the first place.

Anxiety is your body’s way of telling you something. Instead of suppressing it, what if you could unlock the message it’s trying to share?

Here’s my story, and I hope it helps you in some way.

My first panic attack on a flight happened when I was 25. That was the year I lost my dad to cancer, and it felt like the ground beneath me disappeared. Slowly, my fear expanded to tunnels, elevators, crowded spaces — you name it.

I tried medication, therapy, and speaking with healers. It was through a combination of all those experiences that I started to build a new relationship with my anxiety. I didn’t ignore it; I listened. I didn’t just ask what I wanted to accomplish — I asked why.

? Why was this anxiety showing up?

? What did “I” need from me?

? What did “I” need to change, so “I” could feel safe again?

And those questions were life-changing.

I started to realize that my anxiety, and the depression I’d experienced at different points were my soul’s way of screaming for me to wake up. To pay attention. To notice that the life I was living — the expectations I was meeting — weren’t aligned with me.

We are meant to live in freedom and joy, but I wasn’t. I was living according to others’ expectations, and my heart wasn’t having it. When we ignore our true desires, our hearts will scream for attention. Sometimes, that scream shows up as anxiety.

Life will always have its challenges, but that doesn’t mean you can’t live in freedom and joy. And guess what? There isn’t one right way to live. Yet, society often tells us there’s only one path to success.

The Misconception of Having Freedom in Your Life

We’ve been led to believe that freedom looks like a life of luxury and ease. But freedom isn’t bought — it’s created. It’s a mindset, a way of life. And while freedom is possible, here’s what most people don’t talk about:

Freedom doesn’t mean a life without challenges. In fact, it can feel harder because you’re building your own path, which comes with responsibility. It’s tempting to think you need to trade your soul for success, to wear those “golden handcuffs” of security. And when you’re not following the usual blueprint, it’s easy to feel like you’re doing something wrong.

But here’s the truth: Living without anxiety isn’t possible. It’s an internal response, however, anxiety and freedom can coexist.

Freedom and Anxiety: How They Coexist

Freedom doesn’t mean perfection. It doesn’t mean the absence of hard work or challenges. It’s about how you respond to those hurdles without activating panic or letting anxiety take over. It’s about building systems, support, and a mindset that allows you to navigate the tough stuff.

Anxiety often arises when you’re not listening to your heart and there is no system for your heart to express itself through. You need YOUR system that helps develop and maintain a strong mindset during the anxiety, during the challenges, and during the times of creation when you’re in freedom.

The shift for me came when I stopped fighting my anxiety and started listening to it. I built systems, routines, and a mindset that supported my brain and soul health, and that’s when things changed. I began to breathe, to live a life that felt “more me,” and my faith in myself and the universe deepened.

Why Mindset is Everything

Here’s the thing — I’m not immune to stress or anxiety. But now, when it surfaces, I ask myself, “Why?” What am I not paying attention to? What is my heart trying to tell me?

Before a recent flight, I woke up in a panic. Would I have another panic attack? Instead of spiraling, I slowed my heart rate with deep breaths and asked myself questions. What am I afraid of? What do I need to feel comfortable? How can I support myself?

In that moment, I realized I hadn’t prepared enough to feel calm. So, I made a list: affirmations, breathing exercises, snacks, water, calling a friend, reading a favorite book, and thinking about the joy I was going to experience on my trip. I even gave myself permission not to fly if I wasn’t ready.

The Power of Letting Go

Letting go of the idea that things should always be easy made space for my anxiety to speak. And that shift was powerful. It all starts with believing that even in the hardest moments, anything is possible.

The Heart Always Knows

At the end of the day, everything starts with your heart, and that impacts your mindset. When you’re no longer afraid of your anxiety, you access a new level of freedom.

This is the kind of freedom that comes from having lifestyle routines that support your brain and soul health — so you can live with anxiety without being overwhelmed by it.

And that’s what I want to help you create. So, I’m excited to invite you to my new beta program, THRIVE. Together, we’ll build the mindset and routines that support your journey, so you can live freely and fully, even with anxiety by your side. Reply to this EMAIL: [email protected] if you want to learn more.

With love, Pernilla