Why you should build your startup’s social fabric

Building a startup is hard. You don’t know if you have a good idea. And when you share your idea, you receive what can best be described as negative attention. People end up looking at you sideways and shoot feedback at you, most of which feels impossible to integrate into your work in the short run.

That is why building a social fabric to support your ideas--not just a vast network--makes all the difference. A social fabric is a diverse community of perspectives that will help you develop your ideas, offering constructive feedback at the same time as offering tangible support. We can all give our two cents on what someone else is working on, but those in our social fabric don’t just give two cents: they also provide the connections and resources that strengthen your ideas.

Let’s consider the truly gargantuan task of launching a company successfully. First you need a problem. But the problem may or may not be the actual problem you will end up solving. Then you need a solution. Which inevitably will change and evolve, no matter how committed you are to your original vision. Then you need to explain your problem and solution in a way that people understand. In plain language. Which somehow has become impossible to find the closer and more committed you get to your ideas. None of this matters yet, though, because none of it pays the bills. None of it is even all that interesting to others.

So you start to build your network. You go to events (now, as if it weren’t hard enough already, they have to be virtual!) and you bound in with the dream of meeting that person or organization that can take your misunderstood, half-solution with no customers to the next level!

You stop to think: What am I doing? Why would anyone do this?!?

And yet, you carry on. You decide that refining your idea, building your product, raising funds to support the vision (and you working on that vision) are worthy endeavors. You will find a way forward.

Much ink has been spilled on how to start a business. And the research on the Strength of Weak Ties tells us that we need lots and lots of acquaintances to be successful. It makes sense, after all. When we work on ideas that we are passionate about, we are often 1 or 2 degrees away from others who actually care about the ideas we care about. Not everyone you know cares about what you are doing. Often not even your best friends!

This is where building a social fabric comes in. This is different from networking. This is not having a million acquaintances or friends or connections. This is more like rolling a snowball down a hill of soft powder, that grows with time and distance. 

So you know what you need to do: You need to put it out there. But in a different way. Not a pitch. Not from a position of weakness. Not as a question, or worse, with the promise of partnership. Just ask people to listen to what you are working on, and if something resonates, can they help you solve it. You don’t need them to tell you what to do. Anyone can do that. You need them to make an introduction to the person who can solve it, you need them to give you a specific tool to solve it, to run a test for you, to pilot the product, or to write you a check.

This is your “getting started social fabric.” Keep track of the people who join it meticulously, keep asking them for support, come to them with ideas, put them in a newsletter, a WhatsApp group, a Google Group, a massive reply-all CC list of friends, a slack workspace. Whatever it takes to both stay in touch regularly and to continue to get their ideas, connections and engagement. 

Don’t be shy. People prefer to be asked for things. If they can’t help, they will say so. If they can, they will. And if they don’t follow through, remind them.

Failure to follow through shreds the social fabric. Following through ensures it grows stronger for everyone.