How not to Flake On Your Goals

Lately, I've been reflecting a lot on habits. George Washington Carver famously said: 

"Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses."

But I have my own quote: 

"Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who use excuses and fear to give up or not take action today."

What are your typical excuses for not starting or not following consistently a regular habit that is good for you?

1. I don't have time (aka I'm too busy)

2. I don't have the right setup (location, equipment, gear, etc

3. I have access to the knowledge (courses, books, articles, videos, etc) but I don't know where to start or how to actually do it

4. I'm afraid/intimidated/don't want to do it alone

5. My family (or employer, coach, mentor, partner, or a trusted advisor) is against it

6. Now is a bad time (tomorrow will be better)

7. I admit I should do it but I don't want to (stubbornness)

I'm sure there are more reasons/excuses I missed.

So let me say there are very few valid reasons not to start a new habit. If you are very sick or a close family member is, that may actually be a bad time for change. Otherwise, you can and should go for it! But if you want it to stick and not give up after a week or within one month, read this: 

1. Make sure the goal is what YOU really want. I have an exercise in The SASSY METHOD program for uncovering your purpose, which I call a North Star Mission Statement, to discover the values of how you want to live your life and follow them. Your goals must be in-line with your values or else, you will never truly commit.

2. Research various methods and pick the one that works for you. Be realistic based on your personality and learning style. Example: There are a million different diets. Only one is perfect for you. Read, watch videos, ask others about theirs, and then decide which method you will use. Definitely consider getting a coach for this.

3. Play the long game. People crave dopamine and instant gratification when really we need to be committed to the future results that today's actions will lead you to. This means refraining from dopamine and putting in work that will be a bit uncomfortable in the short-term but pay you back double in the future. Believe! Face the Challenge! Quick action doesn't lead to lasting results. You gotta work for it.

4. Write down your WHYs. They must be your deepest and honest feelings. And if it isn't enough for you to change, maybe the WHYs from your loved ones will. Example: If you don't want to give up smoking but you are willing to do it for your family, have your child write you a letter to say how much they love you and want you to live to see them grow up/get married/have children/etc. Keep that letter in your dresser drawer and pull it out whenever the urge to smoke is too powerful to remind you of your WHY. Or a photograph of your grandchildren.

5. Face REALITY about our needs. We lie to ourselves about needing help or which level of help we needed. We keep buying cheap products that don't work instead of making a bigger, scarier investment in something that would work. Why? It is tough to admit and ask for help. Example: We try diet pills when we really need to invest in a personal training package. We may do this for years before giving in. So much lost time and money!

6. Face REALITY about our current state. We don't have the distance to assess our own situation while we are living it in the present. Our mind needs contrast to grasp where we are. Often times, it is only after change that we look back and realize just how far we came. Example: Pre and Post Weight-loss Photos Many people who lose weight cry when they see their pre-weight loss photos because they can't believe they were really that big. Don't let your issues go on too long without taking action because problems don't go away but tend to get worse if not dealt with.

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