Why You Can't Change.

So, you want to change eh?

It's the 19th of January 2023.

You set your New Year's resolutions.

Things were going well at first.

You started hitting the gym 3 times a week.

You began to run in the cold, wintry weather.

You wrote out all your goals for the future.

And best of all, you cut out all the awful habits that were holding you back.

No more drinking.

No more McDonalds.

No more Netflix.

You gave yourself a pat on the back and thought, "this New Year, New Me stuff is easy!"

But then, the second week came.

You still dragged yourself to the gym (reluctantly).

Your running became less intense and shorter.

Your started to doubt whether your goals were realistic.

And worse, your other standards began to slip.

1 glass of wine per week never hurt anybody...

1 Big Mac after a good workout wouldn't go amiss...

1 Netflix episode can't be too bad...

Then, BANG!

You're here, reading this right now and are exactly where you were on the 31st of December 2022.

Square one.

Now, I have a lot of sympathy for your plight.

I'm not some perfect Demi-God who doesn't make mistakes.

In fact, I've had some horrendous habits which took me years to annihilate from my life.

And I'm far from perfect now.

However, it's safe to say my good habits outnumber my awful ones.

And thus I know I can help you.

First, let's talk about why you struggle to change.

The reason is, there's no such thing as a quick fix.

Humans have this illusion around the New Year.

They think that the New Year signifies a cosmic event filled with magic and wonder.

In reality, all that changes is the number on a calendar.

The New Year is not a special day of magic and wonder.

Your birthday is an irrelevant day.

Take away the calendars, every day is just another day.

So, how does this relate to you being unable to change?

Well, it's because you've already programmed hundreds of habits into your mind and body.

You can't just rewire your mind on a conscious level.

No amount of willpower will ever conquer the power of your subconscious.

To fully change, you need to completely overhaul your life.

This is why only 9% of people are successful at sticking with their resolutions.

Because most people do not take enough time to transform themselves.

Let's talk about why this is.

Short-term gratification.

The modern world is full of people getting their fix.

They don't need to put any effort into building a relationship, they can just swipe left or right.

They don't need to hunt a Bison, they can just eat a Big Mac.

They don't need to build a cathedral, they can play Minecraft.

This is going to be hard for you to hear:

The world is not built for you to succeed.

Despite there being more opportunity than ever before, there are even more distractions.

Your mind is a sponge.

It reacts to what you feed it.

If you feed it a bunch of cheap dopamine hits, you're not going to be able to suffer through anything difficult.

if you feed it positivity and good information, you're going to stand a much better chance of success.

The problem is, most of the content in the world is programming you for consumption.

But don't worry, it's not all doom and gloom.

The good news is, there are millions of people who've been able to evolve.

Let's get into how you can do the same.

In a nutshell, you need to reinvent yourself.

Let's say you want to become healthy.

A healthy person doesn't view dieting as a chore.

He views it as what he does.

He doesn't dread going to the gym, he loves it more than anything.

He doesn't eat Big Macs because that would go against his identity.

Trust me, this isn't 'woo woo'.

This is real.

You need to start seeing yourself as the person you want to become.

Then you need to start living consistently with your new identity.

If the new you doesn't play video games, sell your consoles.

If the new you is healthy, fit and active, you need to learn to love exercising.

If the new you doesn't drink alcohol, stop buying booze.

This will be hard for you to do at first.

But don't worry, there's another trick you can use.

Once you feel the tug of degeneracy pulling you towards your old self, you need to stop and think.

Think about the consequences of your actions.

Imagine looking at yourself 10 years from now, without having changed at all.

Now picture yourself 20 years from now, still doing the same old habits.

Now imagine you're on your deathbed, looking back.

Feel the negative emotions flowing through your body.

Can you live with yourself, knowing you wasted all of your potential?

Can you accept living exactly as you are now, knowing your not going to do anything meaningful with your life?

Now come back to the present.

Realise you're not on your deathbed.

Understand that you can change your fortunes today.

You don't have to go another 10 years doing the same stupid things.

You can change.

Now let's do the opposite.

Create a vision of your future that you'd be happy with.

What do you look like?

How wealthy are you?

Where do you live?

You need to create a clear picture of where you want to go, otherwise you'll never get there.

This may take some time, but it's worth it.

After you've created your vision, you need to reverse engineer the steps to getting there.

Instead of making lofty goals like most New Years resolutioners.

You need to set daily goals that you can stick to.

For example, don't aim for a million followers on Twitter.

Commit to writing one tweet, one Dm and one thread every day.

You need to win small before you can win big.

Consistency is what will set you apart from everyone else.

Anyone can go to the gym everyday for a week.

It takes someone special to go to the gym 3 days a week for 3 years.

You're not going to change your life overnight.

This is the essence of this message.

But don't underestimate what you can achieve in 1 year.

People are too focused on getting rich quick and getting the 6 pack in 6 weeks.

Stop it.

Nothing worth achieving in life is ever going to be easy.

You need to think of improving your life as your masterpiece.

Treat it like one.

Do you think Michelangelo painted the Sistine Chapel in a day?

It took him 5 YEARS!

Understand that this is all it takes to win.

You don't need one herculean effort.

You need to take baby steps every single day.

You can do it.

I hope you found this valuable.

If you'd like help improving your life, I'm always here for you. Message me on Linkedin Finlay Godfrey .

- Finlay