Why We Say What We Say: In 4 Languages

While words are defining, context is far more powerful.

Culture is one of those words that has 100’s of meanings. And the words/phrases particular to each of those cultures have 1,000’s more... before you mistake this with a “philosophy of linguistics” exposition, do not fret. This piece is meant for all readers, regardless of background or interest area, and has a simple, narrow focus. It posits that the contexts for which certain expressions exist in a language say a lot more about its native speakers than do the words that constitute a language. Bear with me for a few more sentences, and the ambiguity will dissipate.

For many years, there has been an active debate among linguists and sociologists centered on this simple question: if a culture has 100 words in their native tongue for X object, does that signify something about that culture group? Here are a few examples to help clarify. Since Hawaiians have 47 terms for bananas, 42 for sugarcane and 108 for sweet potato, many conclude that Hawaiians have much agricultural prowess. Similarly, to many observers, the fact that Brazil’s Baniwa tribe defines ants and their various edible varieties in 29 terms speaks to their affinity with nature. Or, the fact that certain Arctic languages have 99 names for different sea ice formations implies (to some) that people groups of the Arctic can adroitly navigate glacial environments. In my experience, as a polyglot who is fluent in 4 languages, I say it’s fair to assume that having numerous words in a language for the same object has some significance. Perhaps, it does speak to the tendencies of that language’s native speakers. However, I believe that this debate should run much deeper.

This article dives deeper, presenting a new angle that goes beyond just words - an angle of seeking to understand a people group not by the number of words used for the same object, but by the context for which certain expressions exist. I reiterate: while words are defining, context is far more powerful. Many of us have had cross-cultural encounters with individuals who have either: offended us with vulgarity or “tasteless” jokes; have perturbed us with incessant requests to indulge in more food and drink; or have made us scratch our heads with their perceived rigidity, lack of punctuality, or perhaps workaholism. We cannot help but inflate these observations into cultural stereotypes. In making these stereotypes, we subconsciously infer things about certain people groups and internalize prejudices, such as “Do these people have any manners?,” “Why are they so pushy? I said I don’t want anymore.” “Gosh. They obviously have no sense of time management.” “Do they care about anything other than work?” These are just some examples of conclusions we could make from our cultural observations; the full list would never end. So are these conclusions accurate or do they lack foundation? Well sure, they are accurate, but only to an extent. You see, it is all a matter of perspective. If we isolate one’s words and behaviors, the only thing we can judge them by is what they say and do. Well, that is just the tip of the iceberg.

Let’s flip the script for a moment and dig deeper, focusing not on what they say and do, but instead, why they say and do. To make sense of all this, we will examine common expressions in different languages. Rather than focusing on the words in these expressions, we will make sense of the unique contexts for which these expressions exist in each language. We will learn 18 expressions from 4 different languages that speak volumes to the cultures they represent. By analyzing the cultural context behind these expressions, we are looking to identify key cultural characteristics of the respective people groups. In short, what do the expressions in a language reveal about its native speakers.

Put on your thinking cap for this little exercise. Below is a list of commonly spoken languages, each with a bullet point list of phrases unique to the language. In addition to the literal definition of each, you will see the context in which they appear in their respective languages (aka, the implications). As a disclaimer, I’ve chosen these because they are the languages I speak and, thus, the ones with which I am most familiar. For the more widely spoken languages, I have chosen particular dialects, as it would be inaccurate to make cultural inferences otherwise. Within each language, the expressions tie together to imply something about the native speakers of said language. Let’s see if you can make the inference prior to reaching my brief analyses following each bulleted list.

German

• alles in Ordnung: When looking to assure that everything is okay with you, one may ask “Ist alles in Ordnung?” - literally, “is everything in order?” - to which you’d normally respond "Alles in Ordnung” - “everything is in order”
• in Ordnung: If one is looking to express agreement with another, they may say “in Ordnung” - as I’m sure you have gathered from above, this means “in order,” but in this case it implies “Yes, I agree with that”
• Ordnung muss sein: A very common German saying, “Ordnung muss sein” literally means “there must be order” and is used in many different contexts
• Ordnung hat Gott lieb: Another common expression, “Ordnung hat Gott lieb” literally translates to “God loveth orderliness” and implies that orderliness is next/close to godliness

Too easy, right? Thought to start off with a simpler one, perhaps one that’s all too-familiar, given the widely known stereotype of German process-orientedness & orderliness. These common household expressions are representative of ‘the German way’: efficiency, orderliness, and punctuality. They contextualize orderliness into expressions of assurance, agreement, and even into proverbs. Promise one thing, though? Do not mistake the orderliness for dryness. While few things sound more pleasant to a German than “Alles in Ordnung,” the people surely know how to have a good time. As they have one of the most active beer garden cultures worldwide, you will never need an excuse to drink. And one final point. Maybe I am not helping my case by mentioning this, but I would be remiss in leaving it out. Did you know that even garden gnomes must follow strict protocol in Germany? A beard, a red cap, and an apron are a must.

Arabic

• ???? ?????: When you ask someone for a favor, they respond with this expression; pronounced “tikram aayounak,” it literally means “may your eyes be honored or delighted” and implies that their eyes will be pleased to see you acting quickly on their request
• ??? ????: Another common response for when you ask someone a favor is this expression; pronounced “ala rasi,” it literally means “on my head,” and implies “I’ll do anything for you”
• ???? ?????: When somebody serves you something, you would likely use this expression; pronounced “esalim idek,” it literally means “blessings on your hands” and implies that you are thanking the hands that served you
• ??????: If someone is offering you something - most likely food - and you decline, they would respond with this; pronounced “Aabet wafer,” this expression is rooted in the historical reality of scarce resources and literally means “are you trying to save this for us?”; the implication is “don’t save for us, please eat to your filling”
• ????? (double health) & ????? (on your heart): Typically when you have finished your meal, anyone with whom you are eating may wish you this; pronounced “sahhtain,” it literally means “double health”; the intention behind it is wishing that your body be nourished for a prolonged period of time; in response you would say use the following expression; pronounced, “Aa kalbak,” it literally means “on your heart” and is a reciprocation for the wish of good health

Selflessness and abundant generosity are two characteristics easily associated with the Arab people. If you have any Arab friends or, better yet, have traveled to the Middle East, you have likely made lifelong friends within a surprisingly short period of time & have even more likely gained some weight in the process. It’s a secret to none that a “Yes please” or “No, thank you” at the dinner table will yield the same result. More food on your plate. The Arabs have contextualized their selflessness and generosity into expressions of hospitality, charitableness, and compassion. The sincerity and “other focus” of the Arab people is immediately evident and present in every interaction: whether it be a waiter taking your order at a restaurant, a friend taking care of your drinks out in the town, or a mother incessantly imposing a 3rd or 4th serving of her home-cooked meal.

Spanish - Mexican dialect

• no rompe un plato: You would describe someone who is clean-cut with the expression “no rompe un plato” - literally meaning “he wouldn’t break a plate,” this implies that there is not a rebellious bone in that person’s body
• no te hagas bolas: When trying to express that someone is confused or rambling, one would tell the “rambling individual” “no te hagas bolas;” literally this means, “don’t become balls,” implying that the other person is dissociating into many pieces and scattering all over the place; contextually, you mean “Alright, calm down.”
• el Satanás, el sapo, el relámpago: Nicknames are often used among friends and families, describing one another based on a defining characteristic or a fun/funny experience; here are 3 examples: “el Satanás - the Satan” (if one swindles often), “el Sapo - the toad” (if one is conventionally unattractive), “el Relámpago - the lightning rod” (if one completes his work very quickly)
• calaveras: These are humorous epitaphs written about friends who are still alive; in these mock up scenarios, one is taken away by the grim reaper for some quality/characteristic that is unfavorable or “deserving of punishment”

If you feel that there’s a joke laden in most Mexican expressions or day-to-day discussions, it’s no coincidence. Humor dominates Mexican conversation; this humor is often undergirded with ridicule or dark undertones. While to an outsider, it may appear that the intent behind these expressions is to offend, that is not the case. While death and laughter seem oxymoronic to most Americans, Mexicans proudly sport their jocular approach to things many would consider “dark.” Humor is a Mexican hallmark, having been contextualized into expressions of playful ridicule, endearment, and even death. That being said, there are a few topics that are considered off-limits; among these are their national symbols and their Lady of Guadalupe.

English - American dialect

• Go the extra mile: An incredibly common expression used in numerous scenarios, “to go the extra mile,” implies that one exerts an unanticipated level of diligence in completing some task
• Pull your weight: Also a very versatile expression, “pulling one’s weight” implies completing a fair share of work; this could apply to one’s contribution to a team, involvement in an organization’s success, or maintenance of relationships
• Fight tooth & nail: Tinged with an element of competitiveness, the expression of “fighting tooth & nail” implies that one is working tirelessly to accomplish some feat or to triumph in opposition to another
• A penny saved is a penny earned: A common household expression “a penny saved is a penny earned” implies that money is more valuable if saved rather than spent
• To grind/to hussle: Two very common colloquial terms in our present culture, “to grind” or “to hussle” connote being highly productive, while working nimbly and keeping flexible; these terms are frequently used in the context of entrepreneurship and business

Emblematic of the foundation of America, hard work and diligence have not lost their importance through the present day. The ideals of exerting immense effort, contributing fairly, and harboring an investment mindset constitute, in big part, the conventional American mentality. This mentality persists into the present-day, with the numerous business and investment opportunities available to all who embrace the mindset. Americans have contextualized their grit and savviness into expressions of undying diligence, fairness, and investment thinking. It becomes clear, then, why many people identify Americans as work-obsessed. Here is an interesting trend to note on the matter. With the rising spirit of entrepreneurship and freelancing (*an estimated 40-50% of American workers will be independent workers by 2020*), perhaps attitudes toward work, contribution, and investment may soon be facing parallel transformations. Time will tell how these shifts will further shape this “American mentality.”

Are you now convinced that language reveals more than you originally think? Not just the words in the language, but the contexts for which certain expressions exist. The fact that German contextualizes the idea of “orderliness” in expressions of assurance, agreement, and characteristic parallels to godliness is rather telling. On the same vein, Arabic’s vast pool of expressions surrounding hospitality and charitableness speaks volumes to the boundless generosity of its natives. Humor, clearly characteristic of Mexican culture, has worked its way into a great deal of their expressions; everything from playful terms of endearment to grave jokes about death (no pun intended). And lastly, there is no mistaking the presence of American ideals like grit and savviness in expressions of hard work, fairness, and investment thinking.

So, what then? Firstly, understanding leads to acceptance. Too often, we are judged by or judge others by our words or behaviors. While I am a strong believer in taking accountability for what we say and do, I am an equally strong believer in understanding why we say and do. Depending on the angle of perception, one could view certain attributes of ours with great admiration while another could view them in complete discord. Despite this variation, seeking to understand the context behind our attributes, utterances, and actions is a step we can all take toward mutual acceptance and appreciation. Rather than limiting one another with false, narrow perceptions, we can contextualize and consent. Secondly, contextualization and understanding creates an open dialog. The next time we are ascribed a wacky nickname, are offered a 3rd or 4th serving at dinner, or undergo some other peculiar cross-cultural experience, let us take a step back. Once we identify the context, any assumptions we have made of others’ imposing or harmful intentions will dissipate. Coming from a place of understanding, we are able to appreciate the manner of expression in context and to then peacefully share our own cultural viewpoint. Rather than becoming confused, offended or remaining silent, we can build upon our understanding by further questioning their way of seeing the world. And that’s all this is. A means to becoming more curious, more driven to know why we say and do. And, in turn, to become more forgiving of what we say and do.

Author Dennis Prager once said, “Judge people in the context of their time, not in the context of ours.” In a direct parallel, I tell you to judge people in the context of their own culture, not yours. And to judge them in that context, we must first seek to understand their culture. Only then can we become part of it.