Why Wait?
As a child, I remember my grandfather asking me what I wanted to be when I grew up. My love of reading inspired my response, “I want to be a writer.” Authors were like superheroes and celebrities in my eyes. Books continued to have such a profound impact on my life that the desire to make such a powerful contribution to the world through words continued into my young adult years.
When I received an email in 2005 that said, “Congratulations, you are a published author!” for my contribution to Chicken Soup for the Girls' Soul, a mighty fire was sparked in me that fueled my momentum for years to come.
I began to immerse myself in all facets of the literary world. My energy and excitement for the work drowned out any need for approval, acceptance, or permission. I reached out to my favorite authors for guidance and attended writer’s conferences all over the country. I planned epic book launch events, book signings, and even my very own book tour which included stops at independent black-owned bookstores, book clubs, and events throughout the United States.
In hindsight, I am proud of my younger self because I did not wait for someone else to tell me I was worthy of that whirlwind of unforgettable experiences. I was able to meet and share space with many of my favorite authors who I read growing up. My most cherished memory is having my favorite author recognize me from Facebook and then buy me a glass of wine. If I had waited, I would have never gotten that beautiful opportunity to meet him because he passed away earlier this year.
What dream or desire are you putting on hold because you are waiting for someone else’s approval or permission? It’s time to take that power back into your own hands. Here are a few strategies to support you along the way.
Choose Yourself. Whether it’s publishing books or buying houses, we’ve been led to believe that there is only one right or best way to make these things happen. Rejection was my greatest gift because it inspired me to find another way. I decided to trust that my truth was good enough to share.
Prioritize the Process. Writing, planning, meeting other aspiring and established authors, and learning about the writing and publishing world were the fun parts. It wasn’t about the outcome, accolades or awards. For me the joy was in the process of commitment, completion, and promotion of the writing projects that were important to me.
Permission for Imperfection. Many great writers have penned books that we will never read. Our need to do things perfectly is often prompted by our desire for acceptance and awards from others, so we wait for their permission to proceed. I chose vulnerability instead. The pain of opinions and bad reviews is just like the soreness after a workout. It’s the good pain that reminds you that you did a hard thing that will make you stronger. I’d rather that to the pain of having silenced the art through which I express my emotions and my truth.
This week I challenge you to take one small step toward the deferred dream that has been lying dormant, waiting for someone else’s permission to launch. Give yourself permission. Approve, accept and award yourself. Choose You. Why wait?