"Why Talking Less and Listening More Will Make You a Better Leader (Sorry, Talkers)"

You know that feeling when you're in a meeting, and someone can’t stop talking, and you’re just sitting there thinking, “Wow, I wonder how long this person can hold the floor before they realize the room is slowly losing the will to live?” Yeah, we’ve all been there.

So, what’s the secret to leadership that doesn’t make people want to fake an urgent phone call to escape your endless monologue? It’s simple, really: Listen FIRST, speak LAST.

Now, this may sound like some guru-level wisdom, but let me tell you, it’s actually quite the power move. Why? Because the real leaders, the ones who win hearts and minds, know that the best way to lead is to gather as much intel as possible before unleashing your own pearls of wisdom. Why go first when you could be gathering all the gossip, clever insights, and nuggets of truth before you even open your mouth?

I’ve tried it. And let me tell you, the moment I stopped being the “talking head” at meetings and started genuinely listening first, everything changed. Suddenly, I wasn’t just “that person who talks too much.” I was a mysterious oracle, letting everyone else speak first and then offering the perfect soundbite that made me sound like I had all the answers.

Step 1: The Power of Silence

Here’s a fun fact about humans: they can’t stand silence. Seriously, it’s like an itch they just have to scratch. So, when you sit there and listen, people are desperate to fill the space with their thoughts. You’ll get the most candid answers, the unscripted stuff, the good stuff. And you know what? If you wait long enough, someone will usually say something that you didn’t even know needed to be said. Suddenly, you have the perfect info to actually help the team make decisions, not just talk about them.

Step 2: The Great Reveal

Now, here’s where the magic happens: you speak last. You don’t dive in at the beginning and try to prove how much you know. Instead, after everyone else has had their turn, you swoop in with your carefully curated thoughts, which, by the way, are based on the insights you’ve just gathered. It’s like you have the cheat code to solving all problems. And trust me, people will listen when you’ve let them talk first. You’re not interrupting them or shutting them down. You’re giving them the space to vent, think, and sometimes even solve the problem for you—before you even said anything.

Step 3: Mastering the Art of the “Power Pause”

A key element to this strategy is the power pause. After you’ve spoken, don’t rush to fill the silence. No, no, no. Take a dramatic pause. Let the room soak in the brilliance that you’ve just dropped. It’s a tactical move that gives the illusion of immense gravitas. People will think you’re really processing something deep and meaningful when in fact, you’re just letting the silence work for you.

Step 4: The Unexpected Twist

And here’s the twist: when you master the art of listening first and speaking last, people actually start to trust you more. Why? Because they see that you value their opinions. You don’t need to be the loudest person in the room to be heard. In fact, you get to be the smartest person in the room without ever having to shout. And isn’t that what leadership is really about?

So if you want to lead like a pro, just remember the golden rule: Listen first, speak last. It’s a simple concept that makes you sound like a genius while giving everyone else the opportunity to help you lead. So, go ahead, use the silence to your advantage. Make your people feel heard. And when you speak, make them feel like you’ve been holding onto their every word. It's a leadership hack so effective, even your cat will be impressed.