Why Taking Less Responsibility Might Be Good for Your Leadership

“Michael, I think you’re taking too much responsibility.”?

Wait, what? It took a second to register.???

I didn’t expect to hear advice like this from another leader—let alone one of our ministry’s board members—about being “too responsible.”???

Honestly, I wasn’t sure what to think at first…? Is there such a thing? Isn’t taking responsibility part of the leader’s job description?????

At the same time, I knew this advice was coming from a trusted source. And deep down, part of me got the sense that he might be on to something based on how I had been feeling lately.???

So, I took these words to heart and committed to doing more soul-searching.?

To give a bit more context, this conversation took place as part of an ECFA board committee focused on leader care. I’m blessed to have this small group of board members who meet with me periodically outside of formal board meetings to check in on how I’m doing and to invest in my well-being as a leader. This committee is one way the ECFA board is investing in proactive leader care within our own organization, consistent with a proposed new leader care standard for our accredited members (see ECFA.org/LeadershipStandard).?????

Back to my recent interaction with the committee, I had been sharing candidly about some leadership challenges that left me feeling abnormally tired and drained. The group was kind to patiently listen, encourage, and process the situation with me.???

Then came that thought-provoking challenge from one of our board members… could it be that my fatigue had less to do with external factors and, instead, was more related to how I was approaching my leadership responsibilities???

It didn’t take long to realize just how spot-on this board member was in his assessment.???

In the weeks following, as I continued to reflect and ask God for guidance, I found myself drawn back to Jesus’ words in Matthew 11:28: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” While I wasn’t proud to admit it, the words “weary and burdened” accurately described my condition. I took great comfort in Jesus’ invitation to come to Him for rest.?

But it gets even better! The next two verses go on to address some of the root causes and give us instructions on how to avoid being weary and burdened.

“Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matt. 11:29-30, NIV)?

In these verses, Jesus gently reminds us to work with Him and not fall into the trap of trying to take on too much in our own strength. When we live this better way in Christ, the result is an easy yoke, a light burden, and rest for our souls.???

But the opposite is also true. Things get out of balance when we carry an extra load beyond what God has asked. We find ourselves exhausted with an unsustainable and devastating burden to our souls.?

Yes, part of being a mature Christ-follower and serving faithfully as a leader is taking responsibility. We don’t get a free pass from doing our part. But there also comes a point when taking responsibility becomes irresponsible and is really just another form of pride in trying to shoulder more than we should.???

When we start to feel an abnormal level of weariness or heavy burden in our lives and leadership, as Matthew 11 describes, that’s a sign we need to step back and evaluate what might be out of balance in approaching our responsibilities.???

For me, it was taking on too much responsibility to see our organization achieve certain goals and outcomes this season. It wasn’t intentional, and I wasn’t aware of it at first, but once the wisdom of others and the truth of God’s Word helped me see this clearly, it became obvious how I became weary and burdened by unnecessarily carrying this weight of responsibility for how things would turn out. When I placed the responsibility for outcomes back in God’s hands where it belonged, I began to feel that weight lifted and rest for my soul like Jesus promised.?

There are countless other ways in our leadership where we can slip into carrying too much responsibility. It might be stressing too much over how our ministries will be funded, staffing our teams, and what other people think of us, to name a few.???

It’s appropriate to take responsibility for all these things to a certain level. But for many of us, when we are passionate and care deeply about our work, the danger is usually not in shirking responsibility but more easily in crossing the line of taking too much responsibility in unhealthy ways.?

What I’m learning is the need to daily reflect on what it means to yoke with Christ as I approach my leadership responsibilities. I need to regularly and honestly assess whether I’m taking on the appropriate level of responsibility or if I’m starting to carry more load than what God has asked and is healthy for me. In addition to this ongoing self-assessment, I’m also inviting trusted others around me to help me see these blind spots.?

By no means have I “arrived” or gotten this perfect. But each day that I’ve been on this journey of intentionally staying yoked with Christ, I’m finding His promises to be true. With this better way of living comes a new lightness to my leadership load and rest for my soul.??

I’ll conclude with the same challenge that my board member shared with me. If you’re feeling an unusual heaviness or weariness in this season, are you taking too much responsibility in your leadership? Have you paused to discern what burdens might not be yours to carry? Will you experience the gift of soul rest that comes from fully trusting in God???