Why The Struggle to Juggle?

In a #LinkedIn poll that I recently did asking women in my professional network to vote for their most significant career challenge, 40% of the 82 respondents voted for work-life balance as the biggest challenge.

This is not surprising as many studies and stories indicate this tip in balance more for women than men. For instance, the Women in the Workplace report by Leanin.org and McKinsey indicate that women leaders are overworked and under-recognised compared to men. Research also reveals that women shoulder more household responsibilities than men on average globally (1).

It is easy to imagine the struggle for working mothers treading the work-life tightrope with kids, household responsibilities, and work demands. However, a senior woman leader in science, who is single, said that she is overworked all the time as the bar is constantly raised each time she meets it.

Additionally, she is a voice for women in science, but the vast amounts of energy and effort that go into such work is hardly acknowledged, least to say, in performance reviews. This is supported by the Lean In report, which highlights that women leaders spend at least two times more time than men in Diversity, Equity and Inclusion (DEI) work which improves retention and employee satisfaction but is not formally rewarded in most companies.

Work-life balance has indeed become a struggle, as further shown by the rising proportion of an exhausted workforce which includes both men and women (Microsoft Work Trend Index, Deloitte Workplace Burnout Survey, Gallop Employee Burnout).

So what is work-life balance, and why is it so sought after and so hard to achieve?

Work-life balance, as the phrase suggests, is that sweet spot where people expect to devote equal time and energy to a job as well as personal aspects such as family, hobbies and other interests. It is the space where stress is countered through relaxation.

When the balance tips more towards one side, most often towards work, people struggle to keep up with personal needs, demands and interests, in turn affecting people's health and well-being.

What makes the balance tip? So many factors are at play, and it is complex because work-life balance is subjective and depends on each individual's specific life phase and environment.

This makes it harder for people to achieve it because the standard advice to improve work-life balance doesn't work for everyone. You may find an example of such common advice, including prioritising, setting boundaries, delegating, self-care and seeking support, in my post here: shorturl.at/doEN9

How, then, to tackle the struggle to juggle?

1. Reflect: First and foremost, what does work-life balance mean to you in this phase of your life? Why is it important for you now? It is essential to understand one's own expectations about work-life balance as it can differ between people, circumstances and life phases. Therefore it is worthwhile spending time reflecting on that. For instance, for some, work-life balance may mean being able to spend good time with family; for some, it may mean being able to devote more time to fitness and health; and for others, it may be having more fun and entertainment in life. Do note that one may also want a good mix of everything as well :).
2. Analyse: Secondly, think about what's currently preventing you from meeting your expectations of work-life balance. Note that it is easy to blame the workplace and employers for your lack of work-life balance. But do take some time to think about your distractions (digital and others), routine or lack thereof, energy levels and health conditions that may be reducing your overall efficiency. This is because when efficiency at work reduces, pending work can creep into personal space. Also, think about the quality of your thoughts and emotions. Is it overwhelming and draining or empowering and energising?
3. Seek Support: Are you receiving the support you truly need? If not, are you communicating the help you need clearly? Interestingly, a study shows that men are doing more at home, but not as much as they think. Funnily enough, a friend once shared that her husband thinks he is helping her a lot by asking her whether he should order in food just when she has done the groceries and started to cook. In my own personal experience, simply asking for the exact help I need from my husband and letting go of the expectation that he must do it my way changed the game for us. In the process, I also had to let go of my mother's guilt and sense of duty to be able to ask for support/delegate.

• It is also essential to communicate to employers the level of support one needs to complete tasks efficiently. Beyond this, organisations have a significant role to play in helping employees find work-life balance. We shall discuss this in another Newsletter.

Translate your learning and understanding into actions

Reflection and analysis alone doesn't work without concrete action. Sharing a few questions below to chalk out your action plan. Do take a journal or open a Word document or Excel sheet as you reflect on these questions:

• What is my expectation regarding work-life balance?
• Is my expectation realistic? Why?
• What external barriers prevent me from achieving a work-life balance? ( Job nature, demands, people, situation, environment etc.)
• What are the internal factors preventing me from achieving a work-life balance? (too many distractions, lack of focus, lack of motivation at work, not in good health etc.)
• Who can I turn to for support?
• Have I specifically communicated the help I need?
• What's one small action I can take today to move closer towards work-life balance?

The last question is especially important as small actions are much more effective in yielding sustainable results. So try one small action at a time and keep going. Remember that it takes time to change things and get things to work the way you want. So be patient and enjoy the journey.

References:

1. https://www.gendereconomy.org/work-life-balance/

Author:

Hi, I am on a mission to inspire and coach people to live a productive and fulfilling life. Join me on this exploration to P.O.W.E.R UP!

I found my Ikigai through many challenges and changes, after spending two decades in science careers, with a PhD in Cell and Molecular Biology from the US.

I now work as a career and professional development specialist, designing and facilitating courses for students and early career professionals.

I aim to share science-backed tips to live a productive and fulfilling life including career, skills development, and worklife balance.