WHY ARE SOME GOALS SO HARD TO REACH? -- THE ASWER MAY SURPRISE YOU

Have you ever asked yourself why it’s so hard to reach some of your most important goals?

·????????Greater income…

·????????More free time…

·????????Better balance between your professional and personal life…

Think about it.

What stops us from reaching so many of our most important goals?

As one of America’s leading behavioral management specialists, this is a question we’ve faced with the thousands of professionals and executives we’ve worked with over the years.

The solution, it turns out, may be easier to implement than you expected, especially once you realize how your own INNER-CHILD is trying to sabotage you behind the scenes.

ONCE HE REACHED HIS GOAL… HE STARTED TO VOMIT

To better understand how your own inner-child is trying to block you and how to overcome it, let’s look at my youngest brother, whom I helped reach beyond the glass ceiling he faced in his mind, to finally get the job of his dreams.

As the senior financial person who helped his company grow from $56 million to $1.1 billion over about ten years, life was terrific for my brother. Even though he had never done anything like this before, he progressed from in-house accountant to THE person who analyzed and financially integrated every company his firm wanted to acquire, while helping assure their core company thrived during this period.

Then he got fired, because of a personality dispute, and suddenly, he became an emotional basket case.

His words heralding the great successes he had achieved. But his inner-child deep inside his psyche reminded him that he had simply been an accountant who got lucky.

As I reviewed his resume, it became obvious to me that he should be promoting himself to recruiters at a significantly higher level than his inner-child was allowing. Because he trusted me, he went along.

I helped develop a plan, rewrote his resume, pushed him to promote it to top recruiters, and provided the pep talks and training he needed to shine on the interviews.

Then, it happened…

The job of his dreams landed in his lap.

Suddenly, reality replaced theory, and he began to panic.

“What if they discover I’m a fraud and fire me in disgrace?”

I remember him calling me, telling me he was in the bathroom, throwing up, afraid he was in way over his head.

Yet, in the days and months that followed, not only did he do an incredible job that no one else could have done, but he was heralded in many parts of the industry as a superstar in his field.

But…

If he was so perfect for the job, why did his body and mind go through such a profoundly cathartic transition?

The answer helps explain our own limitations that need to be conquered if we ever want to realize the life we’ve always wanted.

FAMED ACTOR DUSTIN HOFFMAN – SHARED HIS SECRET NIGHTMARE

Here’s something that may help us better understand how universally our inner-child remains with us, even as we achieve the success we want.

When my son Jordan was young, he was in a ton of movies and tv shows, including a critical role in one with Dustin Hoffman, one of the world’s most acclaimed actors at the time.

In a discussion about my career in behavioral management, Dustin confided in me that he has a recurring nightmare that everyone suddenly realizes he’s a fraud and takes everything away from him.

He wakes up in a sweat as he becomes overwhelmed with this frightening feeling.

You might ask yourself, how could one of the world’s most successful and wealthy actors suffer such a recurring fear?

The answer has to do with our inner child, that talks to our deep-brain even when we may not realize it.

More specifically, whenever an emotional event happens to us, especially when we’re younger, it embeds into our psyche. It cannot be removed, but over time its impact can be reduced.

So, where did Dustin’s deep fear come from?

When he was a young struggling actor living in an apartment with his best friend, Gene Hackman, whenever someone would knock at their door, they would sit in terror feeling it was their landlord demanding rent.

Like Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), the moment of fear from hearing a knock embedded deep within him, like a trigger that would periodically get ignited, causing him nightmares.

So, what about you?

How has your own inner-child been limiting your ability to reach your most important goals? ?

SO WHAT’S THE ANSWER…

Yes, there is an answer. But it involves the intervention of a third party.

You see, because our inner-child is working so hard to protect us from what it perceives as DANGER, it will actually sabotage us if we try to circumvent its power over us.

That’s why we need to either hire a coach or therapist to overcome the limits our inner-child is subconsciously putting on us.

Or at a minimum, find someone we trust and use them as an accountability partner – someone we commit our weekly goal to, who will hold us accountable to achieving that goal.

Tony Robbins was on the cover of Fortune Magazine, where they talked about how his pushing Mark Benioff, founder of SalesForce-dot-com, was critical to Mark's becoming a billionaire. At about a million-dollars a year, not many people can afford Tony's help.

My own firm has also had incredible success using behavioral management to gently push our clients to reach incredible goals. For us, we’ve often been able to accelerate something that’s taken years of effort, and gotten our client to achieve it in just two or three months.

That’s the power of a professional pushing you towards your most important goals.

However you do it, remember, your inner-child thinks it controls you.

If you're serious about stretching to greater heights in your life, it’s definitely possible to overcome the stranglehold it has on your expectations and results.

But with the help of someone pushing you, overcoming its stranglehold on which goals you ultimately achieve could be much easier.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

James I. Bond is the inventor of BRAIN GLUE? – the secret to making your pitches and ideas “sticky,” so they stick in your prospect’s brain like glue.

As one of Americas leading behavioral management specialists, he has been a popular speaker and workshop presenter for the resource partner of the U.S. Small Business Administration. For more than 13 years he ran one of Southern California’s leading behavioral management firms, working with a Who’s Who of American business.

Early in his career, he founded and ran a regional advertising agency in Montreal, working with such major firms as Seagram’s Distillers, Avon Cosmetics, Timex Watches, and Abbott Laboratories.

He is also the founder of The Father-Daughter Project? and author of The Secret Life of Fathers, with a commitment to helping strengthen the relationships between fathers and daughters worldwide.