Why Social Media Doesn't Tell the Whole Story

From the outside looking in, I seem happy. Successful. Well-minded. Inspirational.

However, I think I’m not good enough. I’m a great person. I’m overwhelmed. I’m thankful. I’m disappointed. I’m optimistic.

I think avoiding these thoughts will solve the issues. But the circumstances still persist, and I feel the next day the same way with a multitude of altering feelings like the changing of the seasons.

Throughout our lives, we go through different things such as dealing with the feeling of not being good enough, imposter syndrome, and negative thinking. However, social media usually only depicts the positive instances in our lives, followed by the sense of accomplishment rather than a source of transparency. Mental health is something that we are simply not aware of, not only because it is overlooked but because it usually is never depicted.

I’m here to tell you that (it is, in fact,) mental health is a real thing. I've had different experiences with mental health, ranging from when I was in high school to when I graduated college. We go through the ups and downs in our lives, whether it is after attaining our degrees, being rejected from our dream job, or just becoming the individuals we aspire to be. On social media, we can be seen as successful, as celebrities, as doing great things for others, but it doesn’t always tell the whole story.

How can we become mentally aware and overcome the negative aspects of our mentality not only in the workforce but in our everyday lives? Here are 9 suggestions:

1. Take time to reflect: Even if it’s for a few minutes, take time to write in a journal or even a personal blog. Research shows that by doing so, you’ll be able to think about the matters at hand and also make better progress in the tasks you do. As author Christina Baldwin says, “Journal writing is a wonderful pathway to self-awareness”.

2. Be with friends, not avoid: In other words, relationships matter. I always reiterate that the friends we associate with and those closest to us not only reflect who we are but also affect how we feel, whether it is regarding specific topics or throughout the day. It’s very important to surround yourself with friends who have a positive impact in your everyday life, and although friends come and go, the ones who are the closest and stand by you are the ones worth fighting for.

3. Do what you love with the people you love: Don’t like what you do? Find something that you’re passionate about. In the book “The Happiness Advantage” by Shawn Achor, it talks about how there’s three different types of work: a job, a career, and a calling. A job is something you go to everyday, a “nine to five”, where you only go through the motions. However, a career is something you do everyday that you love with the people you’re with while a calling is giving back to the community through your everyday work. Find something that is both of these for yourself.

4. Take risks as if you have nothing to lose: Scared of sending that email asking for a raise? Worried about how someone feels about you? As the Nike slogan says, “just do it”. You sometimes have nothing to lose. It’s best to know instead of always thinking about the “what ifs”; let’s change our “what ifs” into “what is”.

5. Everyone has their own story; therefore, create your own: We all have the chance to put ourselves in better positions, whether it is through networking or by thinking strategically. Create your own story and others will recognize your hard work and aspire to do the things you’re doing. Remember to not compare your situation/life to others because we all have different career paths to get where we are and want to end up; it’s all about patience and hard-work, and in a matter of time, we’ll get there.

6. Opportunity doesn’t always knock; it’s up to you to make those doors open: Sometimes, we are privileged or simply lucky to come across different opportunities, whether it is for our careers or different instances; however, there are others who don’t have those privileges and therefore have to work 10x harder than others. Remember that there are many doors we can open, and the decisions we make now will set ourselves up for success in the future.

7. Others accomplishments should also be your gains: One of your friends got a dream opportunity that you’ve always wanted? Instead of being envious, embrace and congratulate them. Sometimes, we become envious of those who land opportunities when we should think differently; instead of being envious, ask them how they were able to do it. They may just be open to helping you reach that point as well.

8. Happy music = happy mental state: When I felt down, I noticed before that I’d listen to negative music or music with extensive profanity. However, we have to realize that music does have a direct reflection of our moods, therefore affecting us both positively or negatively. Listen to music that uplifts you and makes you want to go out there and be the best version of yourself! (My favorite is Africa by Toto).

9. Celebrate good times, cmon! (As Kool & The Gang say): In other words, take pride in small wins, whether is is towards your short or long-term goals. Remember that although there are bad times, there will always be good times as well as long as you put the work in.

Remember that if you’re going through things in life, whether it is regarding work, a relationship, or your personal life, there are others who are going through the same thing. Don’t be afraid to reach out (I’m always here for you!) and talk to someone about these things on your mind; you’ll see that social media really doesn’t tell the whole story.

JonathanWordsofWisdom.com #JWoW

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Jonathan Javier is a graduate from the University of California, Riverside. He has worked at prestigious companies including Snapchat, Boeing, and currently at Google. He is also the ALPFA Nationals Program Lead and works on a ton of different initiatives including #JWoW and #WeeklyWordsofWisdom. Last year, he led 21 workshops/webinars at 10 different universities. He is passionate about making a difference in his community, especially for students and young professionals.

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