Why is it So Difficult to Ask for Help?

Previously posted on karlapamanes.com/blog

Let’s talk about asking for help. This is something I’m *not great* at, but I’ve had to become a lot better at it. I recently navigated a cross-country move by myself as a single mom and let me tell you, I had to reach out and ask for a lot of help during that process. It was immersion therapy!

I don’t know about you, but one of the worst aspects of moving for me is putting furniture back together once you get to your new place. I always go into it with an optimistic spirit, but after 10 minutes of trying to figure out which side is “Side C” or which bolt is the #14 bolt, I’m sweaty and annoyed and ready to give up and just buy inflatable furniture (remember that from the 2000s?)

After landing in San Antonio and attempting to tackle this awful task myself, I finally had to admit that this just isn’t something I am willing to do alone. I had to ask for help… just for my own sanity’s sake! I found someone on TaskRabbit and he took this dreaded task off my plate.

He also ended up helping with a bunch of other little projects that were overwhelming me. I wanted to kick myself for not doing it sooner. Why did I think I had to do it all myself?

I think my problem is I don’t like to “bother” people, especially if it's something I think I should just do myself. I am?capable?of assembling furniture, so there’s no?need?to get help.

But I am at a stage in my life where if I can reasonably afford to outsource things that are frustrating or challenging, I am going to do it. It’s just a little bit of kindness I can give myself.?

As a designer, I will have clients that come to me sometimes after attempting to DIY their branding and I can tell they’re frustrated. They thought they could handle it, but found it to be so much more than they thought it would be.

? This is an act of courage! ?

It’s not easy to admit that something is over your head or that you just don’t have the time or energy to take it on right now, especially once you’ve already started. It’s tough to bring someone in and at that point and admit that you actually don’t have the situation under control.

But I will tell you that I am always glad when someone does this. I am SO happy to take this task off your plate so you can do whatever it is that you do best and that lights you up and makes you feel excited. Just like the guy who helped me assemble my furniture! He was happy to step in and help because he knew what a relief it was to me that he was there to handle it!

When something feels like it’s stretching me too far, I’ve been working on reaching out to someone who can help or hiring a professional who can give me peace of mind. If design is one of those things for you — even if it’s just branded social media graphics or a quick logo update — I would be SO honored if you reached out to me so I could help you!

Can you relate? Do you find it difficult to ask for help sometimes? Leave me a comment below and let me know if you have any tips or advice for me! Yes, I am asking for help with asking for help! ?? Seems like the perfect way to end this blog post, don’t you think?