Why should one be careful ?

The Background...

I am not normally a supporter of bigoted politicians of any hue, especially those who believe it is their God given duty to tell women how to dress, behave and in general, live.

However, the sad incident in Goa and the response of the Goa Chief Minister Pramod Sawant caught my attention. As expected in todays social media era, the guy got panned. I tweeted in his favour. I do not have more than two followers on Twitter so you can be excused at not having read the tweet.

What did he say?

Please read this . He said it is the responsibility of parents to ensure that their young children are careful and stay safe while going out to places of danger especially when these places are deserted. What was wrong in that? Many said that girls should be allowed to go anywhere at any time and it was the government's responsibility to ensure their safety.

My contentions :

Would you allow your teenaged daughter to stay at home alone with a close male relative, who is a guest? Even if his behaviour has normally been impeccable so far.

You stay fifteen kilometers out of town and the roads can get deserted at night and your daughter has gone to a party in town. Will you say it's okay for her to drive home alone at midnight?

Will you allow your friend to stay at your house alone with your wife/ partner, while you are away on an office tour? Will the friends wife/ partner agree? Even if they do will there not be a hint of discomfort?

Be honest with yourself...the answer may lie here.

On another level, if you are travelling somewhere at night and have to cross a forest will you really want to do it? Even if the forest had guards? Why would you think again? That is because you fear the unknown.

It is this fear of the unknown, the unknown behaviour within us that we should be careful about.

Think about this..

For those of us who grew up ( rather spent our early twenties) watching Bill Cosby, would we have had the remotest doubt that the man would do what he did. Cut to the present - would anyone think that another Bill - Gates, would possibly qualify for #Metoo? What's with the name Bill and women?

My take..

I have two daughters. My advise to them has always been, stay careful. Do not dress to provoke, intentionally or otherwise. Men, boys, girls - we are all social 'animals' who have been suppressed by the code of behaviour given to us by civil society. The 'animal' in us is kept under control.

This behaviour can easily change under the influence of alcohol, drugs or just an increase in testosterone levels. So, what do you do? You try and stay safe by either staying in a large group, being careful with your alcohol, watch out for behaviour changes or whatever. Can not walking at 2.00 am on a lonely beach be too much to ask?

Of course a majority are 'well behaved' people who will not do anything not acceptable to society but I presume that the minority is itself a large number. I hope you are getting my drift.

We are, after all , a species that has no hesitation in killing millions with the drop of a bomb. Smugglers, large Corporates think nothing of destroying millions of acres of natural forests to smuggle timber, to mine for natural resources .We kill , we maim - sometimes for fun. We are a dangerous species and it just takes a spark to ignite the fire that burns and destroys.

Do we really want to encourage the spark to light a fire? It is finally your decision but I, personally, would lean on the side of caution. Then again, it's only my view but do think about it.