Why is Purpose Elusive

 The purpose is something that is very elusive for people. This is because the human mind is very complicated. Everyone’s story is different. Having said this, the main challenge is finding one’s purpose in life. The question is how many people have found their “real purpose” in life? If the answer is yes of having found a purpose in life, is it a means goal or an end goal?

Vishen Lakhiani, founder of Mindvalley and author of “Code of the Extraordinary” mind and “Buddha and the Badass” tells a very interesting story in one of his videos.

There was a woman who came to him saying that she is frustrated in life with a low-paying job and wants to get a job as a secretary, which she was qualified for, with higher pay. This is because her mother is staying in another city and she wanted the money to be able to afford to bring her Mother so that they could stay together in a bigger house and have a better life than they both had now.

Vishen asked her why does she want a better job as a secretary. She then repeated to bring her mother to her city so that they can afford to stay together. He then asked her why she wants her mother to come to her place. This series of questions got her thinking. Then she opened up and said that it is because there are some family heirlooms which are in her Mother’s house which is small and she is not able to keep them properly and wants to sell them off as she has no space. He then told her she wants a higher paying job as a secretary to be able to bring her Mother so that they stay together and preserve the heirlooms. She said yes. So he then told her that does she need to get a higher-paying job as a secretary which was a means goal. Her end goal was to bring her Mother to stay together to preserve the family heirlooms and she could do something else. She then went and did something which was her passion, got a higher paying job, brought her Mother, and preserved the family heirlooms, which was her end goal.

The above story illustrates the difference between a means goal and an end goal. A means goal is something that has an “If’ behind it. As if she gets a higher paying job, then she can bring her Mother. If she brings her Mother, she can then get the family heirlooms and live together, which was her end goal. You will notice, there was no if after living with her Mother and getting family heirlooms This is an end goal. Money cannot be a purpose because it is a means goal and not an end goal. An end goal does not have an “if”.

For example, getting a job is a means goal, while making a difference to your client’s life is an end goal as there is no “if”. By making a difference in your Client's life, you do not get anything tangible, like getting a job and getting paid for it. If it is an end goal, it could be to better lives, teaching to influence young minds, or doing something for the environment to make life better for everyone, these are all end goals which bring satisfaction and contentment in one's life and help a person find a purpose in one's life!

As people confuse between end goals and means goals, purpose becomes elusive and people do not find their purpose in life.