Why is no one listening to you?

Why is no one listening to you?

Noise. The workplace is full of it. Competing to have your voice heard over the rest is one thing, but actually being listened to presents an even greater challenge – especially when you’re positioned on the lower rungs of the ladder. 

In the midst of the politics, personalities and pretext, attempting to successfully deliver your message to its intended target can be like trying to sink a basket with your eyes shut. You feel like your only choice is to shoot and hope it sinks in, and when it doesn’t you’re left feeling disheartened, perhaps even undervalued. 

Out of frustration, many people facing this problem will default to the misguided strategy of saying what they think people want to hear in order to feel like they’re making a valued contribution. Or, even worse, they’ll ignore their instinct and join the bandwagon of popular opinion. 

Please don’t do it! 

Simply agreeing with other people will serve you absolutely no purpose. It will limit your personal and professional development and, believe me, certain individuals will start offering you the opportunity to be heard only out of their anticipation of your support for them. 

Instead, focus on building your personal reputation and brand as someone who is collaborative, respects other people’s opinions, but clearly has a mind of your own and isn’t afraid of expressing it. And before you post your comment “sure, that’s easy for a CEO to say”, trust me, I didn’t get to where I am today by always taking the popular side. I experienced my fair share of deaf ears and closed doors as I was climbing the ladder, but I never let this deter me from articulating what I truly believed was the right course of action. Naturally, speaking my uncensored mind from a young age rubbed some people the wrong way, so I quickly learnt I would need to improve how I expressed myself. I vividly remember working hard at that; doing so made a significant difference. I began to earn respect and, whether my colleagues agreed with me or not, I had their attention. 

Here’s how I did it: 

1. One size doesn’t fit all

Not everyone likes to receive information in the same way. For instance, some prefer quick, to-the-point messages, while others go for the in-depth conversation that covers all angles. This is why it’s important to understand the individual you’re speaking with and mould your delivery accordingly. Observation is key in this: watch how they respond to others next time you’re in a meeting. What sort of delivery do they seem to respond to best? How do they deliver their own messages? I also see great value in attending external communication development sessions conducted by organisations such as Toastmasters. Objective, professional input can be extremely beneficial to your personal growth and confidence in this area. 

2. Be a collaborative individual, not a compliant groupie 

Pack mentality can be rife in any business. While it’s important to find a way to work with people, hear out and respect their opinion, you will never be truly listened to or earmarked for a leadership position unless you maintain a level of independence. Going against the flow once in a while because you believe it’s truly necessary is a character building exercise. Don’t shy away from the challenge. 

3. Put time on your side

Picking the right time to speak is imperative. Eagerness and impatience to get your message across can often misguide you on this: you rush into it, speaking when the person isn’t paying attention. Again, observation is key in timing. Watch for those moments during the day when the person seems to be relatively undistracted, then engage. Timing applies in meetings, too. I commonly let people exhaust themselves with conversation before making my contribution towards the end of the discussion. Edifying yourself with everyone’s perspectives before sharing your own will help ensure you deliver a comprehensive and pertinent message. 

4. Earn it

As you’ve likely heard before, respect is something earned not given. Being a reliable and consistent performer in all areas of your role can have a marked influence on earning the respect of the people around you and, in turn, their ear. Maintain a positive focus even when times are tough or seem unfair, and if you raise a problem with your manager, do so constructively by offering a possible solution. Nothing is viewed in isolation when it comes to your performance in the workplace.

5. Less can be more

Have you ever been in a meeting situation where someone takes an eternity to reach their point? Long-windedness is a sure-fire way of losing your audience. I’ve always been an advocate of making your point and backing it up with a concise and well-founded explanation. People are often pressed for time, so ensure you use it wisely. Also, be conscious of people’s body language while you’re speaking: it’ll tell you if you’re going on too long. 

Combining these five points will not only take you a long way to being heard, but also a long way in not being forgotten. Remember: take being respected over being liked any day of the week. 

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. 

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Cheers, Happy Reading

Gagan Malhotra

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