Why Nobody is Listening to You - And How to Fix It

Public speaking is simply about delivering information, right? Wrong! It's about connecting with your audience. Building rapport transforms a monologue into a dialogue and makes your message resonate.

Let's have a look at 3 practical techniques to engage your listeners including body language, storytelling and empathy.

1. Body Language - More Than Words

Your body speaks volumes before you utter a word. Effective body language can captivate your audience and reinforce your message.

? Maintain Eye Contact - Engage with your audience by looking at them directly. It fosters trust and shows confidence.

? Purposeful Gestures - Use hand movements to emphasize points, but don't overdo it. Natural gestures enhance understanding.

? Open Posture - Stand tall with shoulders relaxed. Avoid crossing your arms; it can seem defensive.

Let’s look at Open Posture in more detail:

Why Does an Open Posture Matter?

Your posture speaks before you do. A closed-off stance - hunched shoulders, crossed arms, or hands in pockets - can make you seem nervous, defensive or disengaged. An open posture, on the other hand, projects confidence, credibility and approachability.

What Does Open Posture Look Like?

? Stand Tall - Keep your back straight, shoulders relaxed, and feet shoulder-width apart. Avoid slouching or shifting weight from foot to foot.

? Arms Open and Relaxed - Keep your hands visible and use natural gestures. Avoid crossing your arms, which can signal defensiveness or resistance.

? Face Your Audience - Square your shoulders toward them instead of turning sideways or retreating behind a lectern.

? Balanced Stance - Keep an even weight distribution between both feet. Avoid leaning on one hip, which can appear casual or uncertain.

Why Does This Work?

? Makes You More Approachable - An open stance signals that you’re comfortable and welcoming, encouraging the audience to connect.

? Boosts Your Authority - Upright, relaxed posture exudes confidence, making people more likely to trust what you say.

? Reduces Nervous Habits - A steady, balanced stance helps control fidgeting, pacing or defensive gestures such as folding arms or gripping a podium.

When Open Posture Made a Difference

I caught myself crossing my arms during a talk. The audience looked disengaged. When I remembered and relaxed into an open stance, their energy changed - more eye contact, nods, even smiles. A simple shift can transform how your message lands.

2. Storytelling - The Power of Narrative

Stories are a universal way to connect. Why? They make abstract concepts tangible and memorable.

? Relatable Scenarios - Share experiences your audience can identify with.

? Clear Structure - Every story should have a beginning, middle and end.

? Emotional Connection - Tap into emotions to make your message stick.

For example, while discussing teamwork, recount a specific time when collaboration led to success. This illustrates your point and makes it memorable.

3. Empathy: Walking in Their Shoes

Understand your audience's feelings and their perspectives and you will forge a deeper connection.

? Active Listening - Pay attention to feedback and adjust your message accordingly.

? Adapt Your Message - Tailor your content to meet the audience's needs and interests. For example: If you're aware that your audience is anxious about a new policy, acknowledge their concerns and provide reassurance through clear information. - Address doubts or questions openly.

Let’s look in more detail at how you can acknowledge concerns:

How to Address Doubts with Skill and Empathy

Ignoring your audience’s concerns is a fast way to lose their trust! Whether it's scepticism about your message, uncertainty about a concept or a difficult question, addressing concerns directly shows your confidence and builds your credibility. The key is to do it without ever getting or feeling defensive or dismissive.

5 Key Steps to Acknowledge Concerns Professionally

1. Listen Fully Before Responding

o If someone raises a concern, let them finish because Interrupting or rushing to respond can seem dismissive.

o Maintain open body language - nod, make eye contact and avoid crossing your arms or wearing an impatient look on your face.

2. Validate Their Perspective

o Show you understand their concern before you offer your response.

o Phrases such as “That’s a fair point” or “I see why that might be a concern” will help defuse tension.

3. Address the Concern Directly

o Provide clear, honest answers and if you don’t know, admit it and offer to follow up.

o Use examples or data to clarify but avoid overwhelming them with information.

4. Reframe Doubts as Opportunities

o You can turn concerns into a discussion - “That’s a great question, let’s break it down together.”

o If there is a misconception, correct it gently without making them feel wrong.

5. Check for Understanding

o After responding, ask if that answers their question.

o If they still look unconvinced, invite further discussion rather than forcing agreement.

A Talk That Almost Went Sideways

During a workshop I was running someone bluntly challenged my point: “I don’t think this applies in my industry.” My first instinct was to push back, but I paused, nodded, and said, “I get why that might seem the case. Can you share more about your industry’s challenges?”

That small moment changed everything. They explained, I listened, and we found some common ground. Instead of a confrontation, it became a productive discussion.

Why Acknowledging Concerns Works

? Builds Trust - People feel heard and respected.

? Strengthens Credibility - Openness shows confidence, making your message more persuasive.

? Keeps the Audience Engaged – When you addressing concerns you create a two-way conversation not a lecture.

Acknowledging doubts and concerns is not a weakness – it is in fact a genuine opportunity to connect and strengthen your message.

The Benefits of Building Rapport

Establishing a connection with your audience leads to:

? Increased Engagement – Your listeners are more likely to participate and retain information.

? Trust and Credibility - A strong rapport makes your message more convincing.

? Positive Feedback - Engaged audiences provide valuable responses, improving future presentations.

By building effective body language, storytelling, and empathy into your public speaking you will transform your presentations. And by building rapport, you are able to get your message and to create a meaningful experience for your audience.