Why negative emotions are useful.

I'm not proud of what I did yesterday.

I was feeling low and short-tempered, but that doesn't make it any better.?

I was in Tesco buying a Monster energy drink before a workout which I needed to get approval for. (If you're non-UK, someone has to verify your age to buy high-caffeine drinks).?

This got the attention of the checkout lady and her customer who then gave me a lecture about how bad they are for you.

The checkout lady told me that she saw in the news you should only have one a month and that they can mess with your sleep and give you a stroke.

Maybe, if you consume a shit load of them and that's only down to the caffeine content.?

So I asked her about coffee and if it was the same for that. She had no answer.?

That was phase one.?

But then the old chap chimed in.?

“Don't you know how bad all the chemicals are in those things?

That was the tipping point.?

I went off.?

Not because all I wanted to do was buy my drink and get to the fucking gym in peace free from other people’s opinion, but because I can't stand people who chat shit without knowing what they're chatting about.?

I should have let it go.?

I didn't.

Instead, I read a few ingredients from my drink and asked him what they were and the harm that they would cause me.?

He said nothing, just that he knew they were bad.

Red flag, time to ramp it up.

I went over to his meal deal and pointed out all the shit that was in it. The 'chemicals', additives, everything.?

I asked him why it was OK for him to consume all these in what he was buying, but different for me and my energy drink.?

Truth is, there isn't a lot of crap in either, but I was playing him at his own game.? If you don't recognise an ingredient, or it has a long confusing name, it must be bad for you.?

Again, I got no response, picked up my energy drink and walked out.?

And it sat with me for the rest of the day.?

This feeling of guilt.?

Not because I was wrong in what I said, but because that's not the kind of person I want to be.?

I am not someone who has nutritional debates at the checkout of a bloody Tesco.?

I am not someone who concerns myself with other people's thoughts, inaccurate or not and feels the need to correct them and prove them wrong.

My emotions and ego got the better of me and I reacted.

The reason I share this story is simple.

Negative emotions can be useful, but only if we don’t ignore them.

I felt bad because I acted against my values.

Those people weren't responsible for me feeling bad, I was.

And this is why I tune into negative feelings.?

Rather than being all 'positive vibes only', we can become better when we learn from what makes us feel bad.

The guilt I felt was a sign that I acted in a way not in accordance with who I want to be.

And as I sit here writing this, I know not to repeat that if I don't want to feel the same way again.

It was a mistake, but I have turned it into a lesson.

But this only happens if you don't ignore the negative, but instead reframe it as a signal that something isn't right and needs work.?

We don't want negative emotions, but they exist.?

Rather than trying to eliminate them, we can approach them with curiosity and try to work out why they are there.?

When you link the negative emotion to a potential cause, the solution becomes clearer.?

But if you ignore it, nothing changes and you're destined to experience it again and maybe more often.

People often say, "Why do I feel this way?", but they say it as more of a throwaway comment rather than a valuable question that deserves some thought.

It's not easy or fun, but it's necessary.?

When you approach all emotions with curiosity they loosen their grip on you and you create more self-awareness.?

And with this new level of understanding, you can make better choices in the future, or at least not repeat the same ones.?

Going through this process helps you grow as a person and develop a healthier relationship with your emotions where you're not as controlled by them.?

The effort is worth the reward.?

Thanks for reading this today, I appreciate it.?

Karl?