Why is Men's Mental Health ignored?

Research reports highlight that men in India are lonelier than ever. In this context, the emphasis is particularly on the deeply embedded cultural norms and traditions. Speaking from a traditional perspective, the “alpha male” has been considered as the head of the family, generally because he has achieved something great after establishing his social status. For example, a man with a wife and a high-paying job is generally celebrated among other men. Not only does he become the epitome of masculinity, but also an admirable figure envied by other males. ?

The problem, however, arises when some men do not fit into this mold. This is the real point when most men begin to feel isolated. Men tend to face a different dynamic when they are perceived as unsuccessful, lacking in charm, or unable to keep up with the social banter. The fear of being perceived as a ‘loser’ leads most men to isolate themselves when they find themselves amidst financially successful friends leading fulfilling lives. The fear of the stigma associated with being less accomplished, acts as a major contributing factor towards the isolation of most men, as compared to women who turn to their female peers during such tough times. ?

The basic but most important point of difference between men and women here is how men perceive failure as a significant blow to their ego. We must keep in mind that men are strictly conditioned since their childhood to strive for success in every domain; be it academics, professional life, social status, or even marriage. This relentless pursuit of excelling in life and maintaining a certain image in society can severely impact their mental well-being. ?

Studies show that loneliness is a significant contributor to depression. Since depression often goes undiagnosed in men and is therefore left untreated, it is extremely crucial for us to investigate the specific causes of loneliness in men and how it can negatively impact their mental health over time. This becomes even more necessary when we consider that loneliness is also associated with an increasing risk of death among men. ?

As has been previously mentioned, men and women have different coping mechanisms when it comes to handling their emotions, in terms of how they choose to experience and express them. According to another study, it was found that men have a more intense emotional experience while women are more expressive about their feelings. Loneliness, in this respect, can be defined as a deep emotional disconnection, that you experience when you feel as though you are finding it difficult to meet your needs from social contact and relationships. Loneliness ends up turning into a craving for social contact. ?

Research highlights how women express feelings of loneliness more often than men. However, it must also be kept in mind that women are more comfortable admitting they feel lonely. This stems from the notion of toxic masculinity where generations have been raised with the belief that “men don't cry”. This notion means that males must not complain about their negative emotions; rather, they should bottle it all up. ?

Expressing emotions openly is considered more of a ‘female trait’, which also somewhat makes sense because women are more comfortable and likely to express their feelings of loneliness. ?

Here’s what men can do to cope with such an overwhelming feeling of loneliness:?

• Though the connection is tough, it is extremely essential to overcome feelings of isolation. Reaching out can be done by joining a club or sports team. Any mutual interest bridges gaps and ignites conversations that help develop meaningful relationships. As you connect with other individuals in these social circles, it is equally important to be open and more than willing to share your emotions, and become vulnerable, to deepen relationships. ?
• Self-care by doing things that rejuvenate you can help address the mental and physical health aspects. You might engage in activities like exercising regularly, developing better sleep patterns, and improving your diet. These activities can help maintain your emotional balance and ultimately reduce feelings of loneliness.
• As the modern world is becoming increasingly digital, you may explore several avenues like online support groups and therapy platforms along with virtual communities that offer comfort and remind you that you are not alone in this struggle.
• If this loneliness gets chronic, it might be time to seek professional help. Remember that therapy and counselling provide effective tips to manage your emotions more effectively. ?
• Therapeutic sessions can offer a wide range of benefits including anxiety management techniques, cognitive behavioral therapy, and solution-focused therapy. ?

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