Why Major Rosie Wild isn’t lit up by goals, the benefits of complacency, and how being willing to lose helps her win.

Major Rosie Wild is an officer of the British Army and a professional athlete who despite serious injuries won the Sword of Honour at Sandhurst — the first woman to do so since men and women were integrated into the same platoons in 2015. She is also the first woman ever to pass the gruelling Pre-Parachute Selection Course (P Company). Rosie understands challenge.

In this first podcast of series 3 of Better Under Pressure, Rosie and I talk about her favourite reframe, the power in being willing to lose and more. Here, a few takeaways from our conversation.

1. The Magic Of ‘I Get To …’

Rosie shared a shift in perspective that is beautifully simple and transformative. It lives in the tiny space between two phrases: "I've got to" and "I get to."

What strikes me about this reframe is how instantly it can transform our relationship with pressure. Whether facing a health challenge, relationship struggle or a daunting project, this small linguistic flip opens up a whole new energy field.

This is not about denying the weight of what we're carrying. Rather, it's about choosing how we carry it. Sometimes, our greatest power lives in the smallest choices.?

What we focus on shapes how we feel. This simple change can help activate gratitude by reminding us that things can always be more challenging than they currently are

Ask Yourself: What am I carrying right now that feels heavy and would benefit from shifting "I've got to..." into "I get to..."??

2. The Freedom Of Being 'Willing To Lose'

I talk a lot about ‘playing to win’ versus ‘playing not to lose’, but the point Rosie lands so powerfully in our conversation is that, for her, it's about being willing to lose entirely.

It really forced me to reflect on the energy difference involved in that statement. When we are playing not to lose, we contract. We get careful. Tight.?

Being willing to lose? That's where boldness lives. It's where we find the courage to truly go for it. By facing our worst-case scenario head-on, we actually free ourselves to be bolder than ever.

Sometimes, our greatest achievements lie just beyond our willingness to fail.?

Ask Yourself: Where might I be playing it safe right now? What could shift if I were truly willing to lose?

3. Go To Bed Better Than When You Woke Up

When Rosie first mentioned this, I thought, ‘Wow, that’s a pressure in itself’, but as she shared more (and it’s worth listening to how she describes it), I realised the concept of going to bed better than when you wake up, is about setting the intention of micro goals. In other words, introducing small improvements that ignite a bit of healthy pressure to make sure the muscle is used.?

This reminds me of the importance of practising pressure when we’re not under pressure, so that we build our own tried and tested ways of managing it. Regular practice sets us up to choose how to respond when real pressure turns up.

Ask Yourself: How can I stretch my ‘better under pressure ‘muscle every day?

4. You Never Know Who You Are Inspiring

Rosie shared a chance moment when she read a quote that had a huge impact and boosted her determination to achieve a goal that no other woman had previously achieved. The quote was, ‘Be Strong. You Never Know Who You Are Inspiring.’?

She talks about the power of connecting whatever challenge you are facing to whoever is going to come after.? It can be useful to remember in moments of extreme pressure that someone somewhere might be inspired by what you are doing … Someone who might think: ‘if she can do that, then maybe I could do… this’.?

Ask Yourself: Who might I inspire as I face this challenge?

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